Ladder to the Sun
by txffics
Summary: Head completely buried into work, Arizona fails to notice the missing piece in her life, until she finds someone who will make her question her life style and emotions.
1. Chapter 1: Long and Lost

**Chapter 1: Long and Lost**

 _"_ _Sometimes  
I'm terrified of my heart  
of its constant hunger  
for whatever it wants..."_

It was late. Tonight was the fifth night in a role in which Arizona rested her head on the pillow after 2am. Blonde hair carefully brushed, shinning with the reflex of the lamp on her bedside table. She blinked her eyes towards the clock and sighed. She had only 3 hours and 23 minutes before having to wake up and get ready for work once again. At the age of 31, Arizona did everything she could to maintain her body healthy, except when it was about sleep. It didn't matter how many times she had put "going to sleep earlier" in her new year's resolutions. The number of times she tried was the number of times she failed, mostly when she was working on something big.

Turning off the lamp, she closed her eyes and made a mental list of things to do the next day. Even if she had it typed in her phone and written in her assistant's notebook. It was something she had to do before going to sleep. Waking up at 6am, 20min for breakfast, a 40 min run on the treadmill, a quick cold shower, make up, hair, a call to her mom. Julie would have the new marketing analyst coming at 8am for a meeting and there was an interview for the "Living America" newspaper about her column in the "Nation" magazine at 9am. Then, a meeting with the commercial editor for the launch of a Brazilian clothing store in the summer. Oh, and Gina should be coming at some point in the afternoon for her first try of the dress for Tim's and Emily's wedding.

And as she wasn't one to believe in working at home, she would seclude herself in the silent space of her office at the night hours, immersed in her own world. And those hours were when she was more productive. There was just something about the late hours that brought the creation process to a more fluid completion. She had a lot of work to do apart from bossing people around. She started her career with nothing but imagination and creativity. And even though she was CEO of her own marketing company today, she still liked to put her own ideas in some of the projects of "VOX", the ones she thought would be valid to expose her opinion about and maybe make people see things differently. To work with marketing was to have the power of influencing people and their thinking. And she was very aware of the fact that her company was behind the ideas and thoughts spread in the media. She, somehow, felt responsible for the way people would think and act towards whatever was the subject her company was exploring and disseminating.

Feeling her body relax, she thought that maybe tomorrow she would be able to come home before midnight. Letting the exhaustion take over, she soon came to a dreamless sleep.

* * *

The doors slid closed behind her when she walked through the room. There was a commotion, immediately interrupted as they saw her imposing figure entering the building. She didn't have time to give importance to the matter; she was already 10 minutes late, thanks to the idiots who decided it was cool to ignore a red light and cause a crash in one of the busiest avenues of Los Angeles.

A great start for the day, getting pissed at 8:10 am, because Arizona Robbins was never late, something her father made sure to be a part of who she was. In fact, lot of Arizona's personality was inherited from her father and molded by his principles of honor, pride and respect.

"You're late, Arizona", said Julie as soon as she saw Arizona going in the direction of her office. As much as Arizona expected people to treat her with respect, she and Julie were way past the formality of calling themselves for their last names. Walking fast, the assistant tried to alert her about the presence of the marketing analyst already waiting.

"I have a watch, Julie. I know what time it is", she snapped, not a bit of remorse on her face after pronouncing the words.

Julie was taken aback, but she somehow understood the pressure the other woman was under. "Aaall-right!" The other woman half spoke, half sung. "Before you enter your office, Jason Newman is already waiting for you." Arizona stopped in front of her office's door and sighed, giving an exasperated look at Julie. She had told her many times not to let anyone alone in her office. "Before you bite my head off, Mr. Karev is there, too." Well, then.

"Okay, could you please order or get something for us to drink? A coffee or something?", she ate not long ago, but she felt her body screaming in need of some more energy to get through the day that had barely started. Today was still wednesday, but she knew the weekend wouldn't be enough time to recover, because, well, weekends could mean free time for everyone, but not for her.

"I already took care of that. I brought some coffee, tea and some goodies from the pastry you like for them to eat while waiting for you. Your coffee should be still warm." Julie saw Arizona's face soften after that. She knew about her boss's sweet taste. Arizona appreciated the fact that Julie was always a step ahead of her thoughts and needs. It was always like that, even more when they had a "thing" a year ago. She thanked God that they being sexually involved in the past didn't affect the way they worked together. It was good that, even if young, Julie, who was 25 now, was a mature woman.

"Thank you, Julie. And I'm sorry for snapping", she smiled, receiving Julie's smile in return. It was not a good way to start the day if she would let every little thing upset her. She put her hand on the doorknob and opened the door. "Good morning. I want to apologize for my belatedness. But I see Julie has treated you both well", she smiled, watching the men taking a sip of their coffee, both in suits, sitting in front of her desk. She put her bag beside the chair, before going to the men, now standing, and shaking their hands in greet. "It's nice to meet you, Mr. Newman". The man nodded and said his pleasantries. "Karev." She walked around the table and sat down looking at them. "So, right to the point, shall we?" After seeing their nods, she resumed talking. "You were very well recommended to us, Mr. Newman. And without any more delays, we would like to introduce you to the team after this meeting is finished. Right, Mr. Karev?"

Karev was the COO, he had a say in basically everything. She liked to think they were good friends. Not the kind of friends who eat ice cream late at night while watching a movie, but friends nonetheless. The kind that gives you a place to sleep after a night of free alcoholic beverages. Or that talks you into your senses after having an argument with your girl. She trusted his decisions and he trusted hers. And even with Karev's jerk personality, they worked well together. They met seven years ago. Arizona had graduated and was working at home, doing one or other small work. At the time, Karev was a trainee in one of the biggest companies in LA. They were introduced by a common friend, Jackie, in Boston, where Arizona lived with her parents. Karev told Arizona about a project his company was starting in the next month. As brilliant as the blonde was, three months later, Arizona was stepping in sunny California with her right foot. She'd created the best promotional content to a campaign to support public breastfeeding and started working at the same company as Karev. It was a big step in her career. Three years later, she was writing two columns in magazines and two newspapers from three different states, publishing her second book and working directly with the president of the company. It was time to build her own business. Karev came along.

"Yes. You should meet our current marketing analyst and she will be giving you all the information you need. She is willing to take calls and e-mails from you as often as you need for the first month to help you out with any doubts you have", Karev explained, watching Arizona agree with an affirmative shake of her head.

"I think that works really well", Newman exposed his agreement.

"I'm sure Miss Julie Wright has sent you a copy of our contract a few days ago. In it you had all the information about working hours, payment and another bureaucratic stuff. Our people will be talking to you before you sign the papers. That is, after your probation period, which should be one month. So, if there is anything you would like to make clear, ask or request, make sure you let them know so they can change the contract accordingly", Arizona pointed out.

"Okay. That sounds good to me. ", Newman smiled and Arizona stood up from her chair.

"There is one more thing we would like to discuss, Mr. Newman. The initial proposal for your stay was four months. However, we just approved an internal regulation that gives women working at this company a paid maternity leave of six months instead of the normal unpaid three. Before we sign contracts we need to know if you are available and interested in the additional two months of experience in our company."

Arizona watched his look of surprise at her declaration. Unable to read if it was related to the prospect of staying at VOX for a longer period or the fact that she was paying for women to have the opportunity to spend more time with their babies at home. It just never made sense to Arizona the fact that someone would have to be without payment at a time of their life in which they would need it the most. How to provide for a kid if you're not receiving money? It sounded for her as if women were being punished for deciding to start a family and have babies. It was not right. She wanted to approve that regulation right at the beginning, but starting your own business, even when you have money, is never easy.

"I would love to stay as long as you need me", came his response.

"You're invited to stay here for the day, if you'd like. You can get to know the people in the company. Meet Miss Wright outside and she will walk you around and make sure you talk with Charlotte Hill. She will explain how we work", she smiled and shook his hand when he stood. "Have a good day."

"Thank you for the opportunity. It was a pleasure, Miss Robbins." Turning to Karev, "You too, Mr. Karev", shaking his hand too, before exiting the room.

Arizona sat heavily, and sighed, looking at Karev, who was smirking at her. "What?"

"You amaze me when you're all serious and business like. What would people say if they knew the perky side of you?", he questioned, mocking her.

"There is no perky side of me, Alex. Or, at least, it doesn't appear as often". That was a truth anyone who knew Arizona could question. Though, no one was able to say why. Arizona took a doughnut from the box and took a bite, closing her eyes at the taste. It was one of the really few unhealthy foods she allowed herself to have. Anything sweet, really. "You left me my favorite one", her mouth was yet half full.

Karev laughed a bit. "Yeah, Julie made sure I knew what your favorite was. Your coffee is probably cold, though." He saw her taking a sip and making a face.

"You think if I pretend it is warm it will get better?"

Karev laughed. "You can always ask Julie to get you another one", he said and smirked. She knew what he was trying to imply. It was no secret to him the involvement they had. And for Karev, it was no secret the CEO's assistant still had feelings for her.

"Do not start, Karev." Arizona put the doughnut back in the box, suddenly losing her appetite. The coffee went to the trash can.

"I'm not starting anything, Arizona. She is your assistant. That is what she does."

"Alright. Alright." Julie was a sweet girl. Those five months they had together were actually good. Julie would come to her house in the mornings and make her breakfast before going to the office. And sometimes Arizona would come home to a single red rose on her bed. It was sweet and she liked how thoughtful her assistant was. The young woman was nothing bad to look at either. A dark blonde hair and hazel eyes, tanned skin and luscious lips. She had no doubt whoever Julie ended up with, the girl would be lucky. But somehow, Julie was not the one for her. There just wasn't a connection. Or at least Arizona didn't feel it. And she couldn't keep going with something she knew was not right, making the woman fantasize about a future that would never happen between the two of them.

"You were late, today. You are never late", Karev said, out of nowhere, taking Arizona from her thoughts.

"I was ten minutes late, Karev. It's not like I haven't come at all, as you sometimes do when you're not feeling like it", she argued, not feeling like she had to explain anything of her personal life to Karev.

"I can work from home with a cellphone in my hands." He had a point. And she couldn't deny the fact that he never once disappointed her in his duties. The man had the position of COO for all the right reasons. He was loyal, responsible and incredibly intelligent. She didn't need to worry if he was at the building surrounded by papers or at the beach with the phone on his ear. She knew everything that was needed to be done would be done.

She sighed and got her phone out of her purse, dialing a number she knew by heart. "Julie, could you please bring me another coffee? The one you got me is already cold." As soon as the words came out of her mouth, she saw Karev laughing at her. "Sure. Thank you!"

"Now you call her on her personal phone while she is right outside?", he mocked and could see the annoyed look on her face.

"If you don't remember, she is with Newman somewhere else", Arizona said and locked her phone, putting it on her desk.

"You won't tell me why you were late, right? Was there any hot lady at your house this morning?"

"Well, I'm a hot lady, so the answer is yes for your second question." He laughed. It was true. She was hot! There was no denying it. Her hair had grown since they started working together and she wore it now at the level of her breasts, curled in large waves. Her eyes were an intense and vivid blue. And as long as those dimples were on her face, there was no way one could resist her smile.

Karev noticed, though, that his friend had become more serious. A hint of sadness could be seen in her face and something was weighing on her shoulders. Even if she did a good work trying to hide it. He wasn't sure if it was a consequence of her business becoming so big or if there was anything else making the woman lose her interest in all the things she once liked, except work. For a little time, when she was with Julie, he could see she had gained some of her vibrant mood back. However, after they ended things, she was back to her introspective, isolated self. Maybe even more than before. He wondered when would be the right time to bring that up without upsetting her.

"You sure are. Don't let Jo know I said it, though. She's put in her mind that after the day we got married, she is the only hot girl in the world. Or, at least, that is how I have to think." It was time for Arizona to laugh.

"She is a really hot girl, Karev. You got lucky! I have no idea what she saw on you", Arizona insulted in a playful tone. She had no idea what any woman thought was interesting about a man. There were no breasts, body hair was everywhere and their skin was nowhere near as soft as a woman's skin, no soft lips either. Besides, men in general stink. Alex was never the wedding material, either. Sure, he was a good guy and she knew many of his qualities, but she could clearly see the mess Alex always left behind him. If anything, she could say that living with Alex Karev couldn't be easy.

"Hey, I know how to rock a woman's world." He laughed at her disgusted face. "Well, I should go. You have that interview in a few, right?", Alex said while he stood from his chair and walked to the door.

"Yeah…" Her phone rang, impeding her to continue. She looked at him and they both smiled knowingly.

"I will see you in the afternoon for the meeting with the director for the commercial." Arizona nodded and saw him leaving.

"Arizona, Cindy is already waiting for you at the studio. It's 8:45." That was Julie's voice in the phone. She definitely had an obsession with hours that was worse than her own. She probably should be thankful for that.

"I know, Julie. Thank you." She said and got up from her chair, getting her bag and opening the door listening to Julie say "I'll bring your coffee there before the interview starts." She disconnected the call and Arizona smiled lightly. Why couldn't she like Julie? Had she not tried enough? But then again, was love something you should put so much effort into to be able to feel? Maybe to be able to make it work. But to feel? No.

* * *

"Alright, people. That's it for today. I know this wasn't planned for this week, but that is what we got, so let's work on it." Arizona saw everyone standing from their chairs after she spoke, one by one leaving the meeting room while saying their goodbyes. The Brazilian company had called early in the afternoon to ask if they could have the material for the launch of their store and the commercials for TV ready at the beginning of march. And, to Arizona, everything the client wanted was possible. They would have to reschedule basically everything already planned, which meant they had to contact a lot of people and give them a new deadline for everything. Having a big staff helped, she wouldn't be the one doing all the work. But since Arizona had the need to know every detail about everything happening in her business, delegating tasks didn't exactly mean less work for her.

"What do you think?", asked Karev, when they were alone.

"I think we had a productive day. Charlotte said Mr. Newman seems really good and proactive, so we will probably be hiring him after the probation period!" She looked at Karev and saw him nod. "If we follow the plan we can finish the commercials in 16 days, I think. I will want to participate in the edition process. I have to see this being done and getting ready and let's hope the model they want is available." Arizona walked to a near table and got some water to drink, Karev watching her from where he was sat by the big meeting table.

"We better make sure we have some other models to suggest to them. Just in case", he suggested.

"That is on you. I did what I could in the shortest period of time that was possible. You were there this afternoon. I didn't even get a chance to try my dress for Tim's wedding." Tim, her big brother, was engaged for 5 years now, with a very lovely and very, very patient woman called Emily. He had just returned from his third deployment, 6 years ago, when they first met in San Diego. He had come to California to visit his little sister and made Arizona take time off of work to travel around the state with him for 10 days. San Diego was only their second stop when he met Emily and decided that there was no need to continue traveling. At the end of the 6th day, Arizona decided she didn't need to be the third wheel and returned to LA. No one saw Tim for the next 6 weeks. But Arizona was happy her brother was enjoying his time off, even if she would have liked to be with him for longer. Soon, it was time for him to go, leaving four people behind this time.

By the time he was back to the country, a year and a half later, he proposed to Emily at the airport, before going for his 5th deployment. He didn't come back for two and a half years. At that time, his relationship with Emily was in a difficult position. Understandably, she couldn't take it anymore being away from him and worrying about him every second of every day. Pretty much like the rest of their family. Except that the romantic love between two people brought the distance to another level. It was not like they could talk by phone and internet all the time like other people in a long distance relationship did. Spending, sometimes, weeks without knowing anything about the person you love was not an easy thing. For the sake of their relationship, Tim requested that his next deployment was the last one.

He went away without anyone knowing if his request would be accepted. Until four months ago, when he called and announced that he would be coming back home definitely in six months. The wedding date was set for two months after he landed on United States, much for their mother's pleasure.

"Why would you be trying a dress four months before the actual wedding, anyway? What if you suddenly get fat?" Arizona's face looking at him was one of shock and he laughed. Sometimes Arizona was just too easy.

"Have you ever seen me fat, Karev?", she declared flatly. "And blame my mother for the wedding dress fitting plan. She just can't contain herself. It's a bless that Emily lives in San Diego. Otherwise, my mom would have made her crazy already." Last time she talked with her mom in Skype, she had showed her a book with all the things she had planned for the wedding. From the bride's wedding dress to the cutlery that would be used. Barbara made sure to talk to Emily every other day to see how things were going. As the sweet person Emily was, she didn't dare to stop her mother's craziness. Maybe the fact that Emily didn't have a mother was what made her accept and, to some level, enjoy all the things Barbara was trying to do. The older woman considered Emily one of her children since the couple's engagement.

She took the last sip on her water and gathered her stuff from the table. "Anyways… We should have an answer from the model tomorrow. So, be sure that there is a contact list of other options by tomorrow morning. I don't want to waste time", she told him before looking at her phone to see if she had any new e-mails. "Now, my bed is waiting for me. We haven't spent much time together this last month. And I'm sure your wife will appreciate you going home earlier."

"Yeah. Maybe she will let me get lucky today." Arizona rolled her eyes and they walked together through the door towards the elevator, with Karev laughing at his own joke.

They came to a stop before entering the parking lot. "Oh, you know what that commotion was about this morning? There was a bunch of people talking loud about something."

"Apparently, someone took a picture of Caitlyn Jordan without her bra at the beach", he laughed.

"Why do people do things like that?" She never understood the need some famous people had to have everybody's attention towards them. She found it suffocating, the paparazzi, the crazy fans, the sensationalism. But then again, everyone was free to do whatever they wanted in their life without having to worry about what others would think.

"People will forget about it tomorrow when another celebrity decides to get naked in public too." She knew it was true. They lived in LA, after all.

"Well, see you tomorrow", she squeezed his arm and walked out.

It was the beginning of february and the wind was a bit cold in Los Angeles. She put on her jacket and walked to her car, blonde tresses flying at every step. With her body exhausted, she couldn't think of anything better than a hot bath right now. It was still relatively early and she didn't remember when she last had a little time for herself before going to sleep. She unlocked her car and got in, putting her bag in the passenger's seat and turning on the music. She had bought some CDs last week with piano solos. It was something she learned to appreciate when she was in her seventeen's, after a play in school. There was this character that played the piano and she had to listen to an infinity of piano solos for them to choose which one would be the main soundtrack. She smiled to herself at the memory and turned up the volume of the song.

As she was about to turn on the car, her phone started ringing. Looking at the screen, she saw Julie's name and sighed. What could she possibly want at this time? She turned the volume down again and answered.

"Hello." And by that hello, she knew Julie would notice how tired she was.

"Hey, I'm sorry for calling now. I know you are tired." The other blonde said in a low voice and was silent for a few seconds before continuing. "You forgot your laptop at the office and I wanted to call you and see if you were still here and wanted to take it home with you."

Thinking for a bit, Arizona decided that she wouldn't need the object until the next day and… "Are you still in the building? I can bring it to you, I'm about to go home."

"Yeah, I'm in my car at the parking lot." She didn't try to argue, she could wait some minutes.

Arizona rested her head in the seat and closed her eyes, being startled by the light knock on the window of the car 10 minutes later. Squinting her eyes, she tried to focus on the image of Julie and pressed a button on the door, opening the window. The dark blonde was smiling at her.

"Here", she handed her the laptop. "Is there anything else you need for tomorrow?", she asked seeing Arizona put the laptop at the back seat of the car and turn her attention back to her.

"No. Thank you, Julie." Arizona smiled and waited for her to go before putting the window up again. But she didn't move.

"I see you still like it", Julie pointed her head to the sound system in Arizona's car.

"What?", Arizona asked, confused.

"The piano solos. You still like it." Julie smiled and Arizona could see the memories coming back to Julie at the same time hers came to her mind. "We made love to the sound of your solos once."

Arizona tried hard not to look uncomfortable with the situation. 'Make love' was a little too much to describe what they did. That was sex, not making love. She couldn't think of a time in which she made love. Her sexual life started when she was 18, in her last year of high school. The girl was called Laura and they had been dating for three months. They had a good time. It was satisfying and it had the young Arizona completely amazed by all the pleasure sex could bring. They started having sex every opportunity they had. But it was all it was… Sex. They broke up two months later when Arizona started college. She had been with her fair share of woman, had sex an uncountable number of times. But again, that was all it was.

It wasn't until grad school when she finally had her first serious relationship. She liked Camille. The redhead was the one who brought Arizona closer to feeling love. She was sweet, kind, smart and had beautiful green eyes. At some point, Arizona thought that it was love. But even though she felt really good with Cammie, there was something missing. She couldn't put a finger on it, but the empty space was there. They were together for two years and when they ended things, Cammie tired of how distant Arizona had been acting, she felt bad for an entire week. That was as far as she could go on mourning a relationship. For years, all the other women in her life after that were one night stands.

Five years ago she met Clara, with whom she was in a relationship for almost one year. It was easy between them and comfortable. Until Arizona started noticing all the things she didn't like about Clara. Every little thing would annoy her. Like the habit the other woman had of clapping hands when she was excited. Really, at some point, she was looking for things that would be enough of a reason for her to break them up.

She loved and respected women. And her love for women didn't let her delude them or herself. She ended everything the night she knew Clara was going to ask her to move in together. The woman was heartbroken, but it would definitely be harder to end it later. Since then, she just decided to give up trying. Julie was the longest "relationship" she had after that. They were together for 5 months and the only thing that was different about Julie was the fact that Arizona definitely nurtured for her an affectionate feeling which was different from the one you feel for a girlfriend. She trusted Julie and yes, at some level, she loved her. As a friend. Or a family member.

"Julie...", Arizona said in a low and exhausted voice. As tired as she was to talk about that topic, she couldn't hurt Julie's feelings.

"I know", she interrupted. "I won't bring it up again. Have a good night, Arizona." Julie smiled and stood up, walking away without looking behind.

* * *

As soon as the door of her house was closed behind her, Arizona took off her heels, walking bare feet. Black pointy shoes in hand, she made her way around the empty living room towards her bedroom, straight to the walk-in closet, putting the shoes high above her open sandals, beside her other pairs of black shoes. She went to the bathroom and started the water in the tube while stripping down and folding her grey pencil skirt and white blouse, putting them away to wash, along with her matching white matching underwear. Walking around naked, a liberty she loved to have, she chose a bath bomb and dropped it in the tube, watching for a few seconds the light blue dissolve in the water. She put her hair up in a bun and went to the kitchen. The chilly air made her shiver and she felt her nipples getting hard. Ignoring her body's reaction she grabbed a glass and a bottle of white wine and went back to the bathroom. Putting the bottle near the tube and holding the glass of wine, she closed the water tap, immersed herself in the hot water and sighed, putting a towel behind her neck before resting her head on the tube.

She fought hard not to sleep after the warm water enveloped her body with a sense of comfort, thoughts of a time when she had someone's shoulder to rest her head instead of the hard border of the tube playing in her mind. Warm hands caressing her abdomen while lips traveled up and down her neck, hard nipples rubbing on her back. That someone could be anyone she had ever been with. None of them having enough meaning to be chosen as part of her fantasies in the present. It was about having the comfort of someone else's body after a long day of work, not about who that someone was. After two glasses of wine, and before the feeling of failure in her love life could completely take over, she got out of the tub.

The blonde put a towel around her body and washed her face, applying some of the cosmetics she gave herself the luxury of having. With her teeth and hair brushed, she went to put the glass and bottle away and brought with herself a glass of water to put on her nightstand. Freeing herself from the towel, she applied moisturizing in the whole extension of her skin and got under the covers, black panty and a tank top on. She settled the alarm for the next day and delighted herself in the time she had to sleep, 6h and 34 minutes.

Waking up at 6pm, 20min for breakfast, a 40min run on the treadmill, a quick cold shower, make up, hair, a call to her mom. She had a video conference tomorrow at 9am. Teddy was going to meet her for lunch. There was a charity event to be attended at 8pm, what meant she should be done with work by 6pm. She closed her eyes and as soon as her body relaxed and her breath started to get even, her phone rang. Groaning at the sound, she grabbed the device without opening her eyes and put it under the covers to muffle the sound for a few seconds. She brought the phone to her ear, after sliding her finger on the screen.

"This better be important", she said to whomever was at the other side of the line.

"Is this Miss Arizona?", a calm voice sounded through the speaker of the phone. She could hear voices in the background and someone distinctly saying 'She's at room 342, Mr. Parker'.

"Yes? Arizona Robbins.", she answered confused.

"Miss Robbins, would it be right to assume that you know someone called Julie Wright?" Again, the voice sounded calm and collected, as if there was no hurry. This was becoming strange. She wasn't about to give free information about her life to someone she didn't know. And how come this person had her private and very personal number?

"I'm sorry, who am I speaking with?", she inquired to know. It was late and she was tired. As much as she was a very patient person, she was starting to get irritated.

"I'm sorry, Miss Robbins. I'm nurse Charlie Bishop, from the Cedars-Sinai Hospital. We have a woman in our care that we believe is someone you know. She gave us this number. Unfortunately, we can't give you more information if you do not confirm that you know our patient."

Arizona listened to the nurse intently, her heart constricting as she started to put the pieces together. As it seems, Julie was in the hospital. More than that, Julie was in the hospital and couldn't call Arizona herself, which could only mean it was not a scratch or a broken wrist due to a fall. Suddenly, worry started to fill her body, making it move almost involuntarily while she got up from the bed and walked to her closet.

"I'm Julie's boss", the blonde said, with her voice of authority, without noticing, as if there was nothing she wouldn't get when using that tone. "And I know what you will ask me, now. That would be 'Do you know any family member I could contact?'. My answer to that is 'No'."

She knew Julie had parents, but they definitely weren't people the younger woman would like to see, much less take care of her. Julie never talked much about them, all she knew was that they barely had any contact and that their relationship was always a bit dysfunctional.

"If you could, please, skip all the formalities and tell me what happened to her, I would appreciate it. If not, we can talk personally in 15min, when I arrive at the hospital." Arizona really hoped it would work to put up her serious manners. Right now, all she could picture in her mind was a lifeless Julie and that image was too disturbing. She had to be fine. She was fine, right? Or at least she was definitely going to be.

"Miss Robbins, Julie came to our ER in an ambulance after being shot in her right leg. She was conscious when she arrived at the hospital and is now in surgery."

 _"_ _Sometimes_

 _I'm terrified of my heart_

 _The way it stops..._

 _And starts…"_

 _(Terrified Heart - Poe)_

* * *

 **AN:** I've wanted to write and post a fanfiction here for so long. There are a lot of reasons why I didn't. All the reasons are still reasons, but I decided that I needed to try. So, this is my first fanfiction and I hope you guys are receptive to it and are able to respect what I'm trying to do. Also, English is not my first language.

I didn't want to post this fanfiction till I had at least 10 chapters written. However, I really needed some feedback to keep me going. I want to make it clear that this is a slow burn fanfic. And there will be quite a few chapters before we see Callie and Arizona together. I hope I can make the story interesting enough for you to keep reading.

I don't know how often I will be updating. It will depend on a lot of things. As english is not my first language, a single chapter takes a long time to be completed. I have to write it once, then read it and fix all the grammar errors and vocabulary stuff. And then read it a third time, just to make sure it is good enough to be posted. And I'm still sure I made a lot of mistakes. So, please, bear with me

Oh, also, I don't know everything about medicine, Los Angeles, the marketing industry or anything really. To live in a different country can make my truth become your lie. So, if there are any errors about anything, I accept comments correcting it. But please, no judging or being rude. I apologize for any kind of mistakes I made or come to make in the future chapters.

I hope you enjoyed this first chapter and I'll be waiting for your reviews. Feel free to ask anything. Before you can start wondering, Callie and all her beauty will be present in the next chapter.

Lastly, I'm sorry for the big author note. I needed to clarify everything.


	2. Chapter 2: Fazed

**Chapter 2: Fazed**

 _"_ _Don't get any big ideas_

 _They're not gonna happen_

 _You paint yourself white_

 _And fill all with noise_

 _But there'll be something missing…"_

The elevator's doors opened in the ortho wing and Arizona started walking towards Julie's room. She was in a hurry. There were a lot of things happening at VOX and not having Julie helping her was making everything harder. The woman insisted on making her calls and working her magic, but there was only so much one could do from inside a hospital room. Besides, her laptop and cellphone had been stolen. Arizona had get her a new one to days ago. Julie was getting crazy with nothing to do. A simple case of robbery cost Julie an injury on her leg, a surgery, days at the hospital and a psychological trauma. Apparently, LA was not secure enough to walk alone after 10pm. And apparently Julie didn't know that or didn't mind it, since she decided to sit on a park's bench, on her way home, to have a cigarette. She didn't know what was more stupid of her, sitting in a park alone late at night or smoking. Arizona was not hypocritical and she knew that the fault was never on the victim, but if this is what world had to offer right now, there was not much one could do besides be careful.

The police was working to find the responsible. One camera at a street near the park captured the sound of a gun and a man was seen running seconds after. Julie gave them her statement and they were able to do a drawing of the man's face. It was in their hands now. And after 5 days in the hospital, Julie was being discharged today. That was something everyone was looking forward.

The door to Julie's room was slightly open. She could see the woman talking on the phone, her hand in the air, high voice complaining about deadlines. Arizona observed her with a smile and when the woman finally ended the call, she entered the room with a smirk.

"If you keep doing that, you will extend your stay in the hospital, because I'm sure you will have a heart attack or a stroke", said the blonde, resting her bag on the small chair beside Julie's bed and walking closer to her assistant, who just looked at her with annoyance.

"As if you are any better than me in that aspect", she contested.

"I don't need to stress. I have you for that", Arizona joked. She was happy Julie was going home today. It would still be a couple months before she would be completely back to work but she couldn't deny her affection for the younger woman. And after their time working so close, she saw a friend in her.

"My point exactly", she huffed. She couldn't wait to go home. She would be walking with crutches for a few weeks and then start physiotherapy. But still, anything would be better than the hospital.

"Why all the fuss?", the blonde asked, holding Julie's hand between hers. "You're going home in few hours. So, stop being grumpy."

"I'm not grumpy. I'm anxious to go to my house and have a two hour long shower", she huffed. "I stink, Arizona. Do you have any idea how are my baths now that I can´t get my leg wet because of the dressing?", she rhetorically asked, disgust evident in her voice. Arizona laughed. "You laugh because you are not close enough to smell it."

"Who said I don't?" Arizona tried to keep a straight face, but at the look of horror on Julie's face, she couldn't contain herself, a chocked laugh leaving her lips. "I'm kidding. I'm kidding."

"You're too funny today, huh?", Julie said back with a small smile, looking at her hand between Arizona's. Her right thumb was doing circles on the skin there.

"And you're too grumpy", Arizona repeated, seeing Julie roll her eyes and steal her hand from between hers, crossing her arms. "Oh, I think I know what this is about…Has Dr. Torres been here today yet?" Word was that she's a really hot doctor. Julie's words. She had yet to meet the woman. She started to wonder if she was even real, because there was no sign of Dr. Torres in any of Arizona's visits to Julie.

"No. But she has to come and see me one last time before signing the papers so I can go home."

"I see…", she smiled.

"I know what you're thinking. But I can assure you that she does exist. And I bet everyone else working here can assure you she IS sex on legs."

"Yeah. Yeah", Arizona dismissed. She didn't doubt Julie, but discussing the topic women with her former lover… It was not something she was looking forward to do now. The blonde just wanted to take Julie to the safety of her own home and end the nightmare that started 4 nights ago.

At that moment, a light knock on the door made both their heads turn to look at a very tired raven haired doctor. She had a small smile on, while waiting by the door for permission to come in.

Arizona turned to look back at Julie, in time to see her smiling and nodding to the woman. When she turned her head again, there she was, three feet away, extending her hand politely.

"I'm afraid we haven't met yet. I'm Dr. Torres, Julie's doctor."

"No, we didn't have the opportunity to meet. I'm sorry I couldn't be here during your rounds. I'm Arizona Robbins", she apologized and took the caramel hand, receiving a firm shake.

She could tell, just by briefly looking at her, that Dr. Torres seemed too young to be an attending doctor. She thought about the responsibility of carrying someone's life on their shoulders in such a young age. However, she couldn't feel anything but competence and confidence emanating from the woman. The firm hand shake was enough for Arizona to know that Julie had been in good hands.

"It's okay. Julie was well taken care of and the surgery went as smoothly as it can be in her situation. She is doing great", the brunette said, now looking directly at her patient. "Right, Julie?"

"Absolutely. Send me home, please?" That got Arizona and Dr. Torres sharing a small laugh, upon seeing the desperate look on Julie's face.

"Well, fortunately for you, that's what I'm here for. Your scans are perfect. We've put you standing and walking as early as possible and that is an important part of the recovery. You will be using crutches for a few weeks. Now I just need to take a look on the surgery site and give you all the information about how to take care of your leg till our follow up next week..."

Now that she was looking more intently, while the doctor examined Julie and explained everything she should do and care about for the next days, she could take into the doctor's features. There were remnants of makeup on her eyes, result of what she thought was a long night of hard work. Big eyelashes danced when she blinked and dark circles were starting to appear. Her lips were bare and dry while she spoke, showing her perfect white teeth. Her lab coat was wrinkled on the sleeves and her name was embroidered in dark blue, 'Calliope Torres M.D.'. Calliope Torres.

She was brought back from her haze by the melodic voice calling her name. "Well, it was nice to meet you, Miss Robbins", the doctor smiled widely, hugging her tablet with her right hand while burying the left in the lab coat's pocket.

"Arizona is just fine. And it was nice meeting you too, Dr. Torres", the blonde said and saw the woman's smile grow bigger while she turned to the door. A smile Arizona's lips were tempted to return.

The young doctor left and while she walked out, freeing her raven hair from the pony tail and letting it fall on her back and shoulders, Arizona couldn't help but notice… She was beautiful.

"I told you", Julie's voice resonated after the door clicked shut.

* * *

"Hey, Arizona", Barbara called and the blonde turned her head towards the voice. She noticed a hint of hesitance in the other woman's face, as if she was afraid of saying the next words. Barbara had taken Julie's place while she was injured in the hospital six days ago. The young woman had been giving her sweat and blood to prove that she was capable and Arizona was grateful for that. She wondered if it had anything to do with the name she carried. As her mother, the woman was always proactive and tireless. To sum up to that, she had gentle eyes and an innocent soul. And because Arizona knew well the woman who had been working as her receptionist for 3 years now, she knew for sure that something was not right.

"Hey, Barbara. Is everything alright?", she asked while walking to the desk in front of her office door.

"I don't think I'm the right person to tell you, Miss Robbins. But… Mr. Karev is waiting for you in your office. I'm afraid he may have some not so good news."

Without responding her new temporary assistant, her feet involuntarily walked through the door. Alex didn't raise his head from his laptop to look at her while speaking. "Take a sit, Arizona." He pointed his finger to the chair by his side.

Okay. Was it that bad? What the hell had happened? She was sure that by now her face was the image of worry, her blood starting to boil in her veins. She looked suspiciously and a bit angry at him, his authoritative voice contributing to her sudden bad humor.

"I know you're the boss. But, really, this is not the moment. Sit down, because you have to take a look at this."

Complying, she went to sit beside him, his hands automatically turning the laptop so she could see it. There, plastered on the screen, was a picture of her, naked, laid on her bed, sleeping. Her bare back and half of her butt were in display, a thin sheet covering the last bit of her butt cheeks, just enough to maintain one ounce of her dignity. Arizona was never ashamed of her body. But right now, she felt violated, exposed, vulnerable.

"My God, what the hell?" She was certain that all the blood that was before boiling had drained from her body, because she could feel it becoming cold. And if she could bet, her face was now as pale as the white walls of her office.

Before she had time to process, Alex scrolled the page, showing her yet another pic. This one showed a recently showered Arizona, with wet hair and bare feet. She was adjusting her towel, the left side of her body in display, the contour of her breast, her waist and the curve of her ass.

"What are we going to do about it?", Alex asked, clearly concerned. She tore his eyes from the screen, trying not to embarrass his boss for now having such an intimate image of her body in his mind. He could wait till later to be an idiot about this and comment on how hot she looked. But right now just wasn't the time.

"Where did they find those freaking pics?", she questioned to no one in particular. She had yet to move, her eyes still glued to the pictures. "I don't even remember taking them."

"It's clear you didn't know the person was taking them", he pointed out. "What makes you more as a victim than someone who was trying to get attention from the media. But still… This is not good."

Just days ago, she was commenting on why people would do that. Expose themselves on internet to become famous and get attention. And now… Now she was the one naked on internet. She just couldn't believe it. The shock was starting to fade and rage starting to appear. This was a crime.

"But who? How?"

"When was the last time you were with a woman, Arizona?", inquired Alex, calmly, without accusation in his tone.

"In my house? This is my house, Karev. It's been like a year since I brought someone there." She scrolled to the beginning of the page and started reading. 'We all know how hot Arizona Robbins is wearing clothes. And I bet everyone, men and women, had imagined her without them. Well, now we don't need to imagine anymore.' Urgh, this was disgusting! And a terrible, terrible use of words, she had to add.

"Your hair was a little shorter", pointed Alex, referring to the pic of her after the shower. The one they could see more clearly the size of her hair, touching her shoulders and letting the drops of water fall on her chest.

"Yeah…", she clicked in the X button on the corner of the internet page and rested her back on the chair, sighing, thinking, digesting…

"You know, Julie's phone and notebook were stolen", he suddenly said, as if a little lamp had light out in his head.

"Oh, my…" Frustated, she stood from the chair, toke her phone out of her purse and started looking for the page on internet again, saving the pics in the device.

"I just hope your assistant is not some kind of pervert and took other pictures of you in this same context because, even if they are good pics, it won't be good for this company image if they keep leaking."

"It shouldn't reflect in the company, Alex. One thing technically has nothing to do with the other."

"We know that. But other people may not think the same."

"I'm not interested in working for those people." She knew things didn't work like that. Even if she wasn't that famous celebrity the whole country knew, LA definitely recognized her face and her work. She worked for the media, she knew how people usually worked in that line of business. There weren't many merciful people when money was in game.

"But the people you work for have them as a public." She knew that very well, she just didn't want to believe that people would be like that today, tomorrow, forever.

"My pics being out don't bother me like that, Alex. I'm not ashamed of my body. I'm ashamed for being a victim of this. I'm ashamed for the people who expose others like that. I'm ashamed for the people who give them credit and make that kind of news degrading for me and not for the ones responsible for it to happen. I'm not ashamed of myself, I'm ashamed of who took those pics, who leaked them, who published them and the ones looking at them as if I'm a product to be sold…" Karev's phone rings, interrupting her somewhat furious rant, and he shows her who is calling. "Shit…" Mr. Colleman, the one with whom she was about to sign the biggest contract of her career.

"That's why I'm asking again. What are we going to do about it?"

"There is not much we can do, Alex."

"Arizona…", he warned, pointing to the phone still rigging. She seemed to consider it for a bit.

"Talk to Garner, make him get that page to be taken out of internet. He must process the website, too. And I must receive a good big amount of money for moral damages."

"Okay, now that's my girl…", he smiled while rejecting the call. And dialing Mr. Garner on his phone.

"I have to make sure these were the only compromising pics she had on her phone." Arizona said while making her way out of the office.

"Where are you going?", he asked with the phone on his ear.

"I'll pay Julie a visit", Karev listened, before the sound of the door closing was heard.

* * *

"Arizona Robbins!", her best friends voice sounded through the speaker in her car.

"OMG, you saw it already, didn't you?", she answered, turning right while driving to Julie's apartment.

"I didn't know you aspired being naked in the front cover of a magazine". Teddy's voice sounded both surprised and amused. Everything Arizona needed right now was someone joking about it.

"You're kidding, right? In a magazine too?"

"Yeah. I bought you one so you won't ever forget this fine moment of your life", she laughed.

"Oh, shut up, Theodora." Teddy only laughed more on the other end of the phone. "It's not my fault, alright? In case you didn't see, I was sleeping in one of the pictures and not really paying attention in the other." A red light stopped Arizona and she sighed resting her head in the car seat.

"You put yourself in danger when you bring to your home people you don't actually know." Two people in a role thinking she was an inconsequent person who simply brought people home to have mindless sex. Not that she didn't usually had mindless sex with people, because she did, on those rare occasions she was in a bar or party instead of buried inside her computer's screen working. But there were hotels for that.

"It was Julie, Teddy. Her phone was stolen. I didn't bring strangers to my home." There was silence for a few seconds, as if Teddy was considering what Arizona just said. The light turned green and Arizona stepped on the pedal, moving the car forward.

"Look, I know it's not your fault and you know that I don't really care about it or about what people will say, but the Colonel…" Yeah, there was that too. Arizona had painfully remembered, when she got in the car and saw the small American flag stamped on her license plate, that her parents would sooner rather than later be surprised with their daughter's half naked pictures. She could hear Sheldon's, her mom's annoying friend, saying 'Oh my God, Barbara! Jimmy showed me today some pictures of your daughter naked on the internet.' Just the thought of Jimmy, who had disgustingly stalked her those whole teenager years, looking at those pictures and fantasizing about her made a nauseous feeling grow in her stomach. She was sure her face looked disgusted right now.

"I know."

"He will be pissed, Arizona." Oh, good way to state the obvious.

"I know", she said at the same time she heard Teddy's pager blaring.

"Stop saying you know and figure it out. Otherwise you should be prepared for a visit from your dad and mom very soon." The call ended without her friend saying goodbye, after her pager blared again. And just now she became aware of something. Did Teddy know one Dr. Calliope Torres? How much of each other they knew, working at the same hospital? Had the beautiful doctor seen her pictures too?

"Urgh…"

* * *

Arizona stood in front of Julie's apartment door. Looking at the number 352 hanging on it, she took a deep breath and knocked. She had no idea what she would say to the other woman. Her mind was still fighting between 'you bitch…' and 'I know it wasn't your fault'. For someone who would always have a fast answer for all of her problems, she wasn't really right about what she should do about Julie.

"Hi", she heard the voice coming from inside the apartment. Her head turning up to look at the mess Julie's face was right now. She had clearly been crying. "Hm… Would you… Do you wanna get inside?"

Arizona simply looked at her, suddenly feeling very vulnerable herself. Julie had seen her naked many times, but somehow the conscience that there had been pictures of her in her phone made her extremely uncomfortable.

"Arizona…", Julie called, to get her attention. "Please, come in. I… Can get you something to drink?"

And then, that was enough to set Arizona out of her hazed state. Something to drink? Was she serious?

"I think you owe me more than an invitation to get in and a glass of water...", she declared as calmly as she could, minding the fact that she was still in the hallway.

"Arizona... I'm sorry." Julie's voice was scared and conflicted and sad. It somehow made Arizona get mad. And then feel guilty for being mad because she didn't really know who the bigger victim here was.

"You owe me much more than a freaking sorry too, Julie." Her voice was loud enough to resonate in the hallway. She sighed frustrated and put her hands on her pockets while averting her eyes to the corridor, as if waiting for someone to open the door and yell at her for yelling.

"Get in… Please!"

She saw Julie give some small and slow steps back so she could enter the apartment. She walked past the injured woman, getting attacked by the memories. It had been a year since she had entered this apartment. The last time was when they ended things. It looked almost the same. Except for the frames she had added to the wall above the couch and the light grey that took the place of the baby blue that there was in the living room before.

She turned back and saw Julie standing by the door, now locked. "All I came here for was an explanation."

"It wasn't my fault, Arizona. My belongings were stolen. I've never shown those pictures to anyone." Arizona needed to understand that she would never leak those pictures on purpose. She was not a crazy ex looking for attention. There was so much at stake in her life right now. She was injured, she could lose her job and the woman she had feelings for was now exposed to the world. She could lose her friendship now too. Arizona had done so much for her and…

"Exactly. Not even me. Why the hell did you do it, Julie?"

"We were together at the time."

What was that supposed to mean? "And why would that make you think you had the right to take pictures of my almost naked body without my consent? I wasn't yours, Julie. My body didn't belong to you just because we had sex. It's MY body. And now there will be men and women out there using it as a source of pleasure against my will. That is degrading. "

Julie took a step and her face scrunched in pain. Arizona held herself not to walk and help the other woman. They were having an argument. She should stay firm.

"Sit down, Julie", she simply said. She watched the other woman slowly walk to the couch and sit down, resting her crutches on the coffee table in front of her. She looked at Arizona, standing with her arms folded, her back resting on the wall near the window.

"It was never my intention for it to go public, Arizona. And I don't really know what to say besides apologizing. Mostly because I know nothing I say will make it better." Arizona unfolded her arms and brought a hand to her temple, massaging it. Taking some courage to say what she thought was needed, Julie waited for Arizona to look at her again.

"I think you don't really understand that at some point I thought we were going to last. I loved you. I know it had a completely different meaning for you, but just because you felt different, you can't expect me to just pretend my feelings for you didn't exist. I loved you. And if you loved me you wouldn't be here now, pissed because I took those pictures. They weren't indecent pictures. They were images of how I saw you."

Arizona couldn't deny her shock at hearing those words. She knew Julie had loved her. She had never really said those words before, though. They wouldn't change things now. And they certainly wouldn't have changed things then. But to hear someone saying they loved her? That was something she haven't heard coming from another woman for a long time now. It sounded weird. As if the concept of someone actually loving her was absurd.

"There weren't any more pictures like those two on my phone. Just one of your face, the one I took in your office that day we had to stay until very late and you dripped ketchup on your chin while we were eating burgers. You've seen that one."

"You didn't have the right, Julie", Arizona bluntly declared.

"I know", came Julie's simple answer, a sad smile accompanying it. She knew that it didn't matter what her relationship with Arizona was now or what it was before. The blonde would never belong to her. It would never be her right to do anything regarding Arizona. It would never be her right to hug her when she wanted, kiss her without asking for permission, to put her hand on the small of her back and guide her with pride in front of the people they know.

"Just because all you've said it's true, it doesn't make it right."

"I know… And I know that whatever we had, it won't happen again. I wasn't saving those pictures of you because I still had hope. They were just memories of something that meant a lot for me. Good memories. And I'm sorry. I'm really sorry that keeping them brought you trouble. I'm sorry I have no way of making this any better. I'm sorry that I betrayed your trust."

Standing from the wall, Arizona walked closer to the couch. She needed to finish this talk and things were clear, now. She was glad that at the end, even if their friendship was shaken, it didn't end up with them screaming at each other and hating one another. It was true, Arizona's trust on Julie probably would never be the same. But this was the first time Julie had actually let her down. It didn't make her a bad person.

"You take some time to heal. When you get all better you will be back to work, if you still want to work for me." Arizona offered, holding a white flag.

"I do", the injured woman was quick to answer.

"I will keep your payment while you recover and I will keep it the same when you come back, but you won't work directly for me anymore, Julie. "

"Oh… Okay." It was clear the disappointment on the younger woman's face. But right now, or in the near future, Arizona couldn't think about working closely with her again.

"I'm sorry."

"It's okay. I… I understand." And she did. She truly did. What was she expecting? That everything would be okay right away after some apology and that would be it?

"You can have Barbara's old job. And she will occupy your position for the time being. We can think about something better for you later. We both know you are an amazing assistant and that you are capable of a lot more than just assist. I won't harm you in any way, Julie. I just… I need some space, I think."

"You don't have to explain, Arizona. I understand. And thanks… For everything and… You know… For keeping me." There was a sad smile on her face and she tried to stand from the couch when she saw Arizona moving towards the door.

"Don't." She said, trying to avoid an even more awkward goodbye. "You stay there. I can see myself out. The door can only be open from the inside, right?"

"Yeah, just close it after you and it will be okay."

"Well, get better. I will check on you sometime later", Arizona said while walking herself out.

"Thank you", the blonde heard back before nodding and making the door click shut.

* * *

"How pissed is he?", Arizona asked from her place on her bed, hearing her father's feet going up the stairs of her parents' home in Maryland. Her notebook was open and her mother's face was on the screen.

This day would be considered a 'fucking fucked' day. That's how she named it on her head. After getting out of Julie's house she was back at VOX and dealing with all the stuff for the Brazilian clothing collection. Everything was going as planned. Her pictures naked on internet would not stop her from doing her job. Even if it was a ten times harder work when she had to stop what she was doing every five minutes to deal with calls from every one of her clients inquiring about how everything would affect the company's image. It sucked. The whole day sucked. Not even a warm bath was able to calm her. She needed sleep.

"A lot?", her mother's voice came from the speakers.

"Mom, it wasn't my fault", she repeated for the tenth time that night. When she got home, after doing her night routine, she put up a brave face and called her parents. She knew they would be already aware of everything, but she didn't want the drama of this day to be still present tomorrow or the day before. Or whatever day she finally decided to call them. And here she was…

"I know, honey. And he knows it. I think he just needs some time to digest it. As I know you need it too."

"Oh, no. I don't need time. I'm done with it already. The website is down. The magazines are sold out because I bought them all and they are now in ashes somewhere. I don't want to hear about it tomorrow."

"You really think it will be forgotten like that?", her mom asked with incredulity. "Besides, it was not like you had your lady parts showing, sweetie. They were good pictures. God knows that if there were smartphones when I was young and hot your father's would be full of it."

"Mom!" Arizona was sure her mother could see her eyes pretty much bulge on her own screen, her face getting hot from embarrassment.

"Oh, shush. I'm only old in age and in body, unfortunately. I know how people call it today. Teenagers are sending texts to random people asking for 'nudes'." Arizona couldn't stop her laugh. Her mother was an old lady, but she had such a young heart. It was refreshing.

"There are women out there posing completely naked and they are still respected by the media, by their parents, even by their kids. I'm not disappointed in you, Arizona. Neither is your father. It is more about the need we parents always have to protect our children. We can't always do that. And you've proven to be completely able to handle your own problems since you were a teenager. It will pass and soon there will be another person with naked pictures on internet, one that actually wants all the attention."

"Thank you, mom. I love you. Both of you."

"We love you, Arizona. Your dad will be fine in a few days. Now, go to sleep. I can feel your tiredness from here."

And she was. Tired. She never thought she would be so acquainted with a word, a feeling, as she was with the one called tiredness.

 _"_ _So don't get any big ideas_

 _They're not going to happen_

 _You'll go to hell for what your dirty mind is thinking…"_

 _(Nude – Radiohead)_

* * *

AN: Writing this fanfiction has been quite a challenge. Mostly because as much as I love reading slow burn fanfictions, I'm not that good at writing it. My favorite thing about writing are the dialogs. I love dialogs. What makes describing actions and feelings kinda hard for me. However, I don't want to publish content lacking the things that make you understand the characters and how they think. Because, for me, that part is what actually makes you enjoy reading a fanfiction.

I'm so so happy with the feedback you guys are giving me. I know I have many limitations when it comes to writing, but to know that you are enjoying this story and how it is written makes me really happy. And because of all your reviews, I feel propelled to always do better. So, thank you all for the reception and the kind words.

I would like to address a particular review here in the author note. It was from a guest, but I'm sure they will know who they are. I actually really like reviews like yours. It shows me you don't just read it, you pay attention to what you're reading and you analyze it. And that may be positive for me because people who do that may see things I don't see or don't understand the same way.

There are some really mature people out there that would definitely keep in touch with someone they were previously involved. If not for anything other than a mature behavior, Arizona can't fire Julie just because they ended a relationship. And Julie wouldn't just quit her job, a good job, might I add, just because her boss didn't want to continue having a relationship with her. Both of them would end up having big losses if that happened. What I do not want to do in this fanfiction is to make people act inconsequently, super childish or rebel. There will be some situations in which one or other character will lose their mind a bit because, at the end of the day, everyone is human. But my biggest purpose in writing all the characters is making them act like the adults they actually are.

In the actual Grey's Anatomy world April works with Karev, who she had an affair with, Teddy worked with Owen for some time before they both got married. Lexie still worked with Jackson. I know the situation is different because they all worked for the same boss. But at the end, the option of quitting was still there. Not all people make all the decisions in their lives based on sentimental issues.

About Arizona's age... For me the age of 31 is not too young to be successful! I can actually write a rather big list of people, famous or not, that have a pretty successful career even before 31. I have a colleague in work, for example, she is 28 and has a master's degree, a doctor's degree and works in one of the best healthy institutions you can work here where I live. There is this young woman here too that started a blog when she was 15, now, 7 years later, she is author of about 5 books. Arizona in this fanfiction is far from being a celebrity. She is well known. But she isn't someone who is constantly having to hide from paparazzi. What I like to believe is that Arizona he, is a really intelligent woman, emotionally intelligent. And her ideas, what she thinks about people and aspects of life in general is what made her sell books and have amazing campaigns in television regarding important matters. There are a lot of brilliant people in the world. Just because we weren't able to do it, it doesn't mean someone can't.

Arizona is 31 and Callie is 29 in this fanfiction. I'm not actually writting them underage if you think that in season 2 of Grey's, when Callie was first seen, she was just an intern. An intern is around what? 26 years old max? My Callie graduated school at 17, finished undergrad with say 21 and medschool with 25! One year of internship and 3 of residency and she is about to become an attending. I may have made all the math wrong. Because As I said in the last author note, to live in a different country can make my truth become your lie. And all of that med school stuff is totally different here.

At the end of the story, yes, Calzona is older than 31, but that is after 10 seasons! Besides, this is an AU, fanfiction. Lastly, don't worry, Tim will be definitelly alive at the end of this story! I'm not interested in writing anything involving deaths, car or plane crashes, leg losses, shootings or anything like that. No one will be ill either! I don't have any aspiration of writing any drama Shonda style. I hope you keep reading and giving me your feedback of any other stuff that 'takes you out' of this fanfiction. Thank you again for the review.

I think writing big author notes on the end of each chapter will become a thing in this story, because I talk too much. Also, I know we had really little Callie time this chapter. I'm sorry about it. But you will probably like to know that the next chapter is entirely Callie's.

All of the other reviews were answered individually in the review section. So, guys, I answered every one of you there, if you would like to read how much I appreciate your comments! Hope you enjoyed this chapter just as much as the first one.


	3. Chapter 3: Jell-O

**Chapter 3: Jell-O**

 _"Baby, you've been going so crazy_

 _Lately, nothing seems to be going right_

 _Solo, why do you have to get so low_

 _You're so? You've been waiting in the sun too long"_

"Looking good, Torres", Mark's voice came from the table he was sitting in the cafeteria, while she was in the line to get something to eat. She was back after three days off. She came to a point of almost collapsing on the floor after spending two days and nights without sleep, working. When you have a mediocre personal life, that's what you do, you burry yourself into work to forget how miserable you are.

"You think? I wasn't even trying", she said with a smile after sitting in the chair by his side.

"How was your mini vacation?", he asked while biting on fried fries.

"Boring?", she protested, sighing after taking a sip on her coke and starting to play with her salad with a fork. "I cleaned, I went grocery shopping, I slept – that part was good, sleeping is always good – and I watched crap TV."

"Wow! I'm impressed." There was this devilish grin on his face and she was just waiting for the bomb to drop. "You know, I could have entertained you once or twice. You just needed to walk across the hall." There it was. BOOOM!

"You are a prick", she said, mouth half full with her boring salad. Seriously, how could people live eating only that?

"You love me, Torres. All parts of me, if I can recall." He laughed when he saw her eyes rolling. "Or maybe you don't like me that much anymore, since now you are all about lady loving. What I totally understand because if I was a woman I would totally be a lesbian."

"Yeah, right now I don't know if I like penis or vagina anymore. Both have disappointed me deeply. Maybe I will start celibacy." Her salad was being murdered by a series of fork stabs right now. How mature! Fail in love and stab your salad for revenge.

"That would be just ridiculous. The only way you would be celibate is if: 1 – there is no man in the world, 2 – there is no woman in the world, 3 – no man and no woman would want to screw you, what we know would never happen either because you're a hot latina and everyone wants to mambo with a hot latina."

"Thanks, I think?" She took another mouthful of salad and pushed her plate aside. Why was she eating that anyway? Oh, yeah, the other options were day old lasagna and sandwiches. The coke will have to do tonight. Way to start a night shift, huh? She drank her black poison while scrolling through her e-mails on her phone. Mark was now too busy with his fries to talk any more of his stupidities.

She concentrated on reading an e-mail from a researcher, answering her questions about his new project on Perthes disease. Ten minutes later, averting her eyes from the screen, she chocked on her drink when she saw what Mark had in his hands. She coughed for a good two minutes, getting everyone's attention sitting on the tables around them.

"Have you gone mad, Torres?", he asked when she finally took a deep breath and wiped her mouth clean from the beverage that spilled. Her nose was burning! Stupid connections between nose and mouth!

"Since when do you read magazines?" She was a bit confused. She didn't even know why she reacted like that to the picture in the magazine cover.

"Since there are hot ladies in the front cover", he declared, shrugging.

"Where did you find it?" Food and drink completely forgotten now, she took the magazine from his hands and looked at the picture in amazement.

"Didn't you just say that you didn't like vaginas anymore?"

She didn't answer. This was her, right? The beautiful blonde from the other day? She looked through the pages, until she found yet another picture of her. In this one she was laid in bed, her bare back showing. Her skin pale and smooth, small brown dots covering all the expanse of it. The profile of her face, resting on a white pillow, revealed a sharp jawline, perky nose and rose lips slightly parted. She could almost feel the small breaths leaving the blonde's mouth and a shiver ran down her neck.

"Yeah, you will definitely be celibate", he mocked, the last of his fries going down his throat. She flipped the magazine closed and looked at him.

"Where did you find this?" It surprised her how possessive she had just sounded towards someone she got to know for barely 10 minutes. All she knew about the woman was her name and the fact that she was extremely beautiful.

"At the doctors' lounge. I thought it wouldn't hurt to bring it with me, since you were off and I had no one to sit with". There was a childish pout on his lips. Big kid Mark, a real pooper.

"That's what you get for being an ass", she simply declared, getting up from the chair and cleaning her mess. Salad now in the trash can, where it should be in the first place.

"Hey, I haven't finished reading it", his voice sounded behind her, his feet following her out of the cafeteria and into the hospitals halls.

"As if you were really reading it", she laughed.

"Well, I was. She is queen of kick ass commercials."

Mark knew her? How come Mark knew her and she didn't? Was she so oblivious to the world? Oh, yeah. She was. Being kicked in the ass by the two of her exes and ignored by her family had that effect on her.

"You know her?"

"Nah, they said it on the magazine. I wouldn't mind knowing her, though. Actually, I would like to really know her. REALLY know her. If you know what I mean." Callie was getting irritated. She didn't know exactly why, as that was how her idiot of a friend always talked about women in that disgusting pervert way. This time around, though, she wanted to slice him with a motor saw.

"Oh, shut up, Mark."

"Why are you all defensive, right now?" She looked at him sternly unconsciously hugging the magazine to her chest. "You know her?"

"Nope". Her answer was so quick in coming out he immediately knew she was lying. She stopped walking bringing him to a stop too, turning to look direct to her.

"You are so easy, sometimes, Torres. Where do you know her from?"

"I don't know her." She didn't actually know the other woman. I mean, she met her once. Was it enough to say that you knew someone? No.

"You're lying."

"I saw her once for ten minutes. We exchanged a total of about 5 sentences and that was it. I don't know her. I met her. It's different."

"Yet, you're hugging her picture in a magazine as if you were actually hugging her."

What? She looked at her chest and there was the magazine, squished by her arms. Oh! Where had gone her self-control? Mark laughed and she tore her gaze from the magazine to his face.

"Oh, my God. There it is. I would be killed if I didn't find this." Teddy's voice startled her. The magazine was suddenly being pulled out of her. "Did anyone else see this?" The new cardio surgeon asked. She was brought to the hospital by Owen only three months ago, after Erica went MIA on her.

"The two of us. Why?" Mark didn't really understand all the fuss about this woman's pictures.

"She would kill me if I let her pictures travel all around the hospital."

"They've probably traveled all around LA by now." At Mark's obvious conclusion, Callie felt surprisingly bothered by the fact that everybody saw the woman half naked. But why?

"No. She bought and burnt all of them."

Callie and Mark looked at Teddy incredulously, while she walked out, magazine in hand.

* * *

"Hi, Aiden. I'm Dr. Torres and I will be taking care of you tonight." It was a terrible crazy night in the ER. There where patients on the corridor, moans of pain everywhere, the ORs where all occupied. No fatalities, though, just a bunch of small simple cases. She didn't remember it being so packed. What the hell was happening in LA tonight?

"Hi, Dr. Torres", greeted the boy with discomfort all over his face. Aiden Carter, 12 years old kid, left leg injury. That was all the information she got. Everyone was running around trying to assist all the patients.

There was a man in the corner, looking at everything but the boy. His face was mixture of worry and anger.

"You must be his father?", she asked, extending her hand, which he took and gave a firm, but quick shake.

"I am", he simply said, going back to his previous position with his arms crossed. His face held a stern look after he averted his eyes to the kid.

"I will need to take a look at your leg, alright?", she informed the kid, approaching the boy and taking a look at his leg. No blood, no exposed bones, that's a good start. Maybe he will only need a cast and go home. When her hands just as much as touched the leg, however… Yeah, definitely not just a cast.

"Ouch…", he cried in pain.

"I'm sorry, buddy. Could you take it for just a few more seconds?", she asked, needing to examine more and see the integrity of his muscles. He nodded and closed his eyes, as if waiting for the worse. She tried to be as delicate as possible, but pain was evident when she saw him curl his toes in his other leg. "Can you wiggle your toes on your left leg too, Aiden?" He tried and the movement was barely there. "Could you tell me exactly what happened?" She ended his torture and took her hand off of him. Walking a little bit closer to the bed head.

"I'm a gymnast! I fell when landing from a jump on the Floor category."

"And earned yourself a double fracture in the tibia and fibula.", she gave the bad news with a small smile and a squeeze to his hand, to comfort him. Looking at his face, she could clearly see the tears collected in his eyes. He proudly hold them at bay, refusing to cry during the exam, as a young man would do. He was cute. Straight hair the color of almond, green eyes and freckles.

"Yeah. I knew it would be bad." He was a kid who loved a sport and now he wouldn't be able to do it like before for a long time. Cases like that were always a bit sad. Any case with kids was always sad, actually. She had no idea how doctors in pediatrics did it.

"As bad as the punishment you will take for going back to the gymnastic center." Now that he had decided to talk that was what came out of his mouth? What was happening here?

"Dad…"

"No, Aiden. You shut up and let the doctor fix what you broke." His angry voice resonated, too loud for her liking. This was a hospital. No one would scream in a hospital, no one would scream at an injured child. That was a bit too much, Callie decided.

"Mr. Carter", she firmly called. "You are in a hospital. Your son is hurt and he is in pain. You guys can talk about punishments when he is back home."

There was a moment of awkward silence. Callie held her serious gaze on the father's, defying him to disrespect her authority.

"I will need surgery, won't I?" Her attention was brought back to the boy, clearly worried about his state and clearly shaken by his father's behavior.

"I have to run some scans, but from what I've seen here? That would be a big yes. I'm sorry, Aiden." Callie gently ran her hand up and down his arm.

"Will I be able to go back to gymnastics?"

"What won't be letting you go back to gymnastics is not an injury, Aiden, it will be me." Even though his voice was now a bit more collected, his demeanor didn't change.

"Mr Carter", she criticized again, watching him open the curtains of the box and get out. This guy was a jerk.

She turned back to the kid and smiled sweetly at him, trying to soften his worries. "We will get some scans. You will have surgery, if really needed, and if you put enough effort into it, you can be back in gymnastics in maybe three to four months. You will need some time to completely heal." Giving him another smile, she gently messed his hair, to what she received a grin in return. "I will see you in a bit. Pretty soon there will be someone here to take you to get the scans, alright?". With that, she walked out of the ER box. What a waste of fatherhood! Okay, now she needed to talk to the pediatric surgeon about his case and come back to the next patient.

* * *

It was 10pm and her head was throbbing. Tell me about how three days off can ruin a person's routine. Routine? What was even that, anyway? She wouldn't complain, though. Teddy was in a worse state. Four people had coded in the ER. That no fatalities statement? Gone. An old gentleman with a heart attack and a pregnant woman who was in an accident didn't make it. And now? Now she needed to go to that poor kid's room and deal with his idiotic father.

"Alright, Aiden. What do you want first? The good or the bad news?", she asked putting on her best happy face, getting even happier when she saw Mr. Carter wasn't in the room.

"The good one."

"Oh, you go different than most people in this one, huh?" She walked towards his bed, holding the tablet with his scans. "Well, the good news is that the damage to your legs is not as severe as I thought."

"Bad now?" There was this funny look of angst in face, she couldn't help but laugh a bit at it.

"Yeah, buddy. I'm sorry. You will still need surgery." She tried to sound as cheerful as she could. There was something about being a doctor that absolutely every doctor should know. What you show your patient when talking to them about their problem, that's probably how they are going to feel about it too. Even more if your patient is a kid. If you show you're worried, they will be scared. If you seem relaxed, they will be calm. If you sound optimistic, they will have hope. "But your recover will happen much faster if everything goes well and that is a plus."

"Does that mean I can start exercises again sooner?" See? That was definitely a hopeful kid.

"The only exercise you will be doing, Aiden, is with your eyes. You will burn them, reading books and studying for those exams you forgot to pass. Remember?", came the voice from behind her, Mr. Carter having just entered the room. For Christ sake! She wanted to run. At the same time she didn't want to let the kid alone with the man.

She decided for the most mature thing. She talked the man through the surgery procedures and turned her attention back to her patient. "I will see you in a bit in the OR, alright? Just relax. It will be like taking a nap." She smiled at him once more and walked out of the room, questioning herself if it would be right to call the social worker.

* * *

The following morning, Callie's breakfast consisted of cereal. Followed by a big cup of coffee, which she was sipping right now, while walking to the nurse's station on the ortho floor. She had rounds. And then she was going to pass out on an on call room. Usually she would love this, the sleepless nights saving lives and changing medicine, the adrenaline of doing a surgery. Today she couldn't think of anything better than going home. She just didn't care if her apartment was cold and dark, she didn't mind if she would be there all alone. She needed peace. When her life had become this pathetic she couldn't put a finger on. It was like she was living on a limbo. As if every day she was living the same day. Nothing new. Life wasn't supposed to be like this.

"Hey, Dr. Torres, I'm with you today". She turned to look at a very excited Lexie. Interns! Yes. Just what she needed. Without saying anything, she grabbed the pile of charts and handed them to her. She took another big sip from her coffee and walked to the first patient. An hour later, there she was in front of Aiden's room. Save the best for last, she ironically thought. She sighed and opened the door, Lexie following right behind her.

"Hey, it's good to see you awake. You alone?" She said directly to the boy, his father nowhere to be seen.

"Dad went to get something to eat", he said shrugging. She quickly ran her exam on his leg, explaining what she had done in the surgery and what was going to come next for him. Lexie made her questions and the boy watched interested while she taught the intern all about spiral and green stick fractures, internal fixation, healing process.

"How are you dealing the pain?", she asked as her attention went back to him.

"Have I known drugs are this good I would have tried them sooner." She laughed at him. Was it any other occasion she would have scolded the kid. He was clearly joking, though, despite his tired look. And who didn't love some pain meds?

"That good, huh? You don't seem pretty happy, though." Callie observed him, who looked at Lexie. She followed his eyes, silently asking Lexie to give them some privacy. When they were left alone, she came closer to him, resting her weight on the bed, almost sitting on it and taking his hand. He looked at her, who gave him a little smile and sighed. His eyes went to the window. Light blue sky, always sunny LA.

"My dad, he… ", Aiden started, before taking a moment to think of how to explain it. "He's the only thing I have in the world. My mom died when I was seven. In an accident." There was this nostalgic feel in his voice, as if he was remembering her. He turned to look back at Callie. Her hand hold tightening to encourage him to continue. "She had been a gymnast too. He just can't accept it. He is not a bad guy, but after she died, I stopped practicing. Only two years ago I decided to come back. It hasn't been easy. It's like he hates me since the day he found out I was back. I love him, but… I love gymnastic. It's the only way I found to connect with my mom and it's sad that, even though she is dead, I feel like I have to choose between the two of them."

"I'm back", the man walked in, coffee and a bag in hands. Aiden quickly wiping the tears that threatened to drop.

"Good morning, Mr. Carter". There was now in her a dosis of compassion for the man. Not that his behavior was excused, but maybe she should give him a chance. He didn't look as aggressive today as he was yesterday, anyway. "I'm just checking on him."

"Is everything alright?", he asked, putting the food on the small table by the window, his hand going to inside of the pockets on his khaki pants.

"Yes. Absolutely perfect." Callie was standing and she walked closer to the man. "The incision sites are healing well, we need to observe for a feel days. If everything is good, he will be out of here in four to five days." She watched him nod and look at his son, the corners of his mouth slightly turning up. "Can I talk to you for a moment, please?" Looking back to her, he took a minute decide, finally walking towards the door and opening it. He indicated the exit for her with his hand as an invitation to go outside with him.

"I'll be back later to see you again", said Callie, as a goodbye for Aiden.

Outside the bedroom, door properly closed, she thought hard about a way of saying what she needed without being aggressive or rude. There had been already too much of that "Mr. Carter, I don't want to intrude in your relationship with your son, but… Having your support while healing is important for him. He will need help, and physiotherapy is hard."

"I will make sure he attends the physiotherapy sessions", he guaranteed.

"No, Mr, carter. You didn't understand." Come on. How do you say it nicely? "He needs your support. He needs his father."

"If he truly needed his father, he would have listened to what I've told him and none of this would have happened." Anger was back on his slightly raised voice.

"He loves gymnastics, Mr Carter." She tried again, her voice calm, even when her blood was starting to boil inside her veins. "Nothing you do will change that. You can forbid him from doing it all you want, it won't make him stop loving it. It will probably just make him love you less."

"What do you think you are?" Mr. Carter's tone was now a full out scream. Callie's eyes widening in surprise. "I thought I required you to be my son's orthopedic surgeon, not his psychiatrist."

"Every doctor is trained to care for the entire wellbeing of their patients, Mr Carter." She could already feel people watching, Lexie's scared form just behind the man.

"I don't give a shit about your training. And I want another doctor. NOW! I want another doctor RIGHT NOW! You have no idea what it's like to have to raise a kid alone. You probably don't have any idea about what it is like to raise a kid at all. Do you?"

You know what? Compassion be damned. "No. I do not have children, Mr. Carter. But you can be sure that when I have them, and I want many of them, I will make a better job than you're doing. I know nothing about being a parent but I know enough about being a daughter and what we need from our parents is to be loved, no matter what. You are doing a poor job of showing your kid you love him. And he has told me he loves you, but if the acting you have going on right now is what you will give him for the rest of his life, I'm not sure he will love you much longer." She took a breath and her angry eyes buried into the man's greens. "I'll make sure a social worker will be coming to speak to you."

Without as much as looking back, she stormed out.

* * *

After her outburst, Callie looked for the first on call room she could find. Her mind more exhausted than her body, she laid herself in one of the bunk beds and closed her eyes. The ER was a complete mess last night, she didn't have a minute's sleep and she still had two surgeries this morning. She needed to cool down.

This feeling was suffocating. Like the life she was living didn't belong to her. Her body was suddenly new. Her feelings completely changed. Her mind completely confused. Her soul completely abandoned. It was tiring. To not be able to solve the problems making your life as suffocating as drowning in cold water.

It wasn't about her feelings for Erica. It was about what feeling like she did with her meant. It wasn't about her dad hating her. It was about feeling it was her fault her family didn't want any sort of contact with her anymore. After 3 months she still needed to accept what her life had become. And it wasn't easy. Because one night she was discovering this exciting new part of her, she was thriving in work and her parents loved her. The other night, she was being left in a parking lot, her dad was bringing priests to cure her. She had just completely lost perspective.

After a crazy night of pile up accident, heart attacks and sport injures, she found herself taking a two hour nap. Two emergency surgeries and a lunch later, she locked herself in the safety of the lab, working on her cartilage. She had made progress in the last months. Her personal project being the only thing keeping her sane.

"Hey, Callie."

She was so concentrated she didn't see the other woman get in. "Oh, Bailey, hi." She averted her eyes for a few seconds, bringing them back to the table she was working on.

"How is it going?" The voice was coming from her right side now.

"Bad? As everything in my life?", she answered in an amused tone.

"Oh, sush. You're 29 and top of your line surgeon, trying to make cartilage out of nothing. You're not even an attending yet and works like you're head of the department. Stop pitting yourself."

Callie stood from her inclined position, looking at Bailey. Eyebrows raised. "You really are good at making people feel good."

"What happened with you this morning, Callie?" That was Bailey, always right to the point.

"Dad still doesn't talk to me. Aria's baby was born last week and I wasn't informed. Mom is probably looking for a legal way to make me not her daughter anymore." If it wasn't so sad, she would laugh at her own joke. "Anda that guy was an idiot."

"That bad, huh?"

"Worse", she simply declared, turning her attention back to her Jell-O. "I don't know why a father would treat their child like this for simply doing what makes them happy. I have no idea what parenting is like, but I'm sure it isn't supposed to be like this."

"It isn't. But..."

"I don't really wanna talk about it, Bailey. I will get my shit together. I always do." She rashly declared, shaking the tube she had put the Jell-O inside minutes ago.

"Callie… You are a beautiful, intelligent, independent, courageous, kind hearted woman. That won't change just because you discovered you can love people by what they are and not by what there is in the middle of their legs." Callie's giggle is heard inside the small lab. "There is nothing you can do to make your family change their minds about you besides being yourself. There really isn't anyone better for you to be."

By now her giggle has transformed in a full belly laugh. "Oh, yeah."

"Are you even listening to me?" Was someone talking to her? She couldn't hear by all the excitement running inside her body.

"Oh my god, I did it." Her mouth smiling so wide she was afraid her face would split in two. But who care, right?

"What?" What was wrong with that woman?

"Look, Bailey. Look! It's not liquid! It's not liquid! Oh my God, Bailey!" There was a millisecond of time before Bailey was hugged by the ortho resident.

"Oh, you stop that. Hugs are a bit too much." The hug around her got even tighter as Callie giggles. "Let go of me." She said in a high pitch voice, in an attempt to free herself from the strong arms. "Kids", she huffed, smoothing her lab coat with her hands after Callie finally took her arms from around her. "There it goes my Harper Avery…", she murmured to herself as she started walking towards the door.

"Bailey?", Callie called with a smile on her face.

"What?

"Thank you… For 'doing personal' with me." Bailey could say as much as she wanted that she didn't care about people personal problems. She always ended up by her side when she thought Callie needed.

"You're welcome, kid. Now go home and sleep. We can celebrate your genius brain tomorrow night.

* * *

It was 5:30pm in the next day when Callie was pulled into an emergency surgery. What made her celebration plans change a bit.

"Mark..." She yelled while running through the hospital hall towards OR 3 "Joe's tonight, 8pm. Be there."

"What? Why?" She heard in the distance, her feet had taken her far already.

"Just be there", she yelled again, turning right and disappearing from his sight.

* * *

Callie needed booze. And dancing. And singing. Because yesterday and today were the first days in the last three months she had felt truly happy. Her personal life was still shitty, but today she wouldn't let that ruin her night. She was a great doctor. Tonight, she was Dr. Badass Torres, who makes cartilage from scratch.

Joe's was surprisingly full for a Karaoke night. Those nights were not as popular as in the old days. Or maybe it was just something more common in Miami. The lights were lit towards the stage in which a couple was singing the corniest song she had ever heard. She couldn't help but laugh. It was actually all Karaoke was about, laughing at the bad singers, cheering the good ones. Guaranteed fun since ever.

Mark was late. Probably licking himself in the mirror while getting changed to come. She made a disgusted face to herself at the thought. The rest of the people were here, though. The ones that were not on call, anyways. Bailey, Cristina, Owen and Lexie. Oh, Teddy, yeah. Teddy had yet to arrive too. She hoped the blonde hadn't been pulled into another emergency surgery. It was like the whole LA was having heart problems, these days. It seems the old generation of California people weren't as fitness as the one in the actual days.

She had grown to like Teddy. She would probably love anyone who substituted Erica Hahn, though. Only not Preston Burke. Or maybe even him. But enough about idiotic cardio surgeons.

"Hey, Torres. Why are we here?" Mark's voice came from behind her, who was at the bar getting everyone's drinks.

"What? Can't we just have fun?", she smiled while taking the tray from the bartender, after smiling at him as a thanks. She walked towards the table, balancing the tray and diverting from all the people in the way.

"Well, yeah. God knows you need it. But even Bailey is here", he said, pointing to Bailey when they reached the table and she gave everyone their alcohol.

"Well..", she turned to look at him with a big smile. "You're looking to the new LA's ortho goddess ." The doctors on the table clapped their hands and whistled and she giggled. Mark's face was one of pure confusion. "I made cartilage from scratch yesterday." She simply declared, sitting on her stool and drinking her tequila.

"What?" His smile was probably as big as hers. He got closer and engulfed her in a big hug from behind, depositing a kiss on her head. "Good job, Torres. You're brilliant, you know that?"

"I'm starting to think that I am", she laughed.

"It's your time going there, Callie", Owen pointed out. "I've already embarrassed myself enough for today." Everyone on the table laughed. Cristina had challenged Owen to sing a Whitney Houston song. Yes, not his finest moment, she remembered, laughing.

"Alright. Alright." Callie stood up from the stool and looked straight to Lexie. "You are next!" Lexie could never dare to defy those demanding brown eyes. Yeah, at least not when she would be working closely with Callie for the next entire month. "And you too", she said to Mark. "It will be nice a duet."

She walked to the stage and whispered something to the man. A few seconds later, the melody of "Cry me a river" resonated in the space of the bar, followed by Callie's rich and strong voice. Much to every person hearing dismay.

"Now you say you're lonely

You cried the long night through."

Callie had always loved sad songs. Since she was a little kid. They made her happy. And while she sang that particular song, she closed her eyes, remembering how her father would always put a vinyl record on a phonograph every sunday morning. She would wake up and her dad would be closed in his office. The stuffy sound coming from behind the door. She used to eat her breakfast very slow because, from the kitchen, she could hear the faint melodies hitting her ears in calm waves. The entire song came out of her mouth as her mind was flooded with memories.

When the song soon came to an end, she smiled big when she opened her eyes again, watching her friends from afar, clapping. The memory of her dad was bittersweet, but tonight was a good night. And as always, the sad song made her happy.

The night progressed in a light mood. Lexie and Mark embarrassed themselves in the stage with a ridiculous version of 'Girl's just wanna have fun'. Yes, Mark had sung that song with Lexie. She had never laughed so hard in her entire life.

Only when the clock was hitting 9:30pm, the sound of the door signaled the arriving of Teddy. The blonde stopped at the entrance while her eyes scanned the place, looking for her friends. In the right corner, she saw them drinking and talking while a guy beautifully sang a Michael Bublé song. Callie had a straw on her mouth and the top half of her body was moving in synchrony with the melody. The heart surgeon walked to them.

"Hey guys. I'm so sorry I'm late", she apologized when approaching the table, as everyone directed their attention to her. "I spent almost an hour to convince this woman to come."

And that was when the beautiful figure of a blue eyed magazine cover was noticed by everyone, including a pair of brown eyes.

"Oh, blondie…" Mark said with a smirk.

 _"But if you sing, sing_

 _sing, sing, sing, sing_

 _For the love you bring won't mean anything_

 _Unless you sing, sing, sing, sing"_

 _(Sing – Travis)_

* * *

AN: I really love Callie. Somehow, though, I find her so much harder to write. That's part of the reason why this chapter took longer to be updated. Some will question "but Callie made her cartilage at 29 years old?" Yes and no. It's some kind of prototype. Something is created in the lab and that takes sometimes years to start being really used in real medicine. It was just the first step.

I hope this chapter was appreciated for those craving some Callie time. And for those hating the many scenes with Julie, know that she won't be present in the next chapters as she was in the last two. She won't just disappear, though. She is important in this beginning of the story. She won't be as important later.

I would like to address the people who have been sending me some not so nice messages. Well, I still appreciate your comments. If you wanna keep sending them, feel free to do so. I won't start moderating guests' reviews. I'm mature enough to know how to deal with criticism and free hate.

I was, during years, only a silent reader of fanfictions here. After posting this story I finally understand how much reviews mean for the writers. For those of you who don't really understand how much a review makes us happy and stimulates us to write more and better, just think that the desire to write and post things here surges from the need to share. Sharing and knowing that you made something other people like is truly all that makes someone keep going. Like when I hear a "Thank you very much for your help" from my patients at the end of a long 12h a day job. So, thank you very much for all of those who took a little time to review and everyone who read it. I've seen the Traffic Graph and there are actually a lot of people reading this story. Thank you, guys.

My answer for every one of you guys reviews is in the review section as the last time. It would really really make me happy to hear from you.


	4. Chapter 4: Twenty more minutes

**Chapter 4: Twenty more minutes**

 _"_ _Well, I'm just discovering I'm living in a different body_

 _Caught a little insight into_

 _Everything that's happening to me."_

Even after years living in LA, Arizona had never come to this bar. Teddy had dragged her here after half an hour of arguments, until she got tired of saying no and decided to come. It had been two months since she had gone to a bar, to simply drink and have fun. And even though she didn't know anyone who would be there besides Teddy, she made an effort to put on a pleasant face. Those were the people Teddy worked with, her friends. She would stay for an hour, be social and then go home. That couldn't be too bad, right?

She entered the bar with Teddy leading the way and looked around. There was something about this place that made her think of her younger days. It was crowded, people were dancing and singing in a stage. Oh, karaoke night. Yeah, this bar was like going back in time, to when she actually had a social life, in college. That bar she went two months ago? It was nothing like this. In her admiration of the atmosphere, she didn't notice they were now standing in front of a table, her eyes still on the stage, where a man was finishing his song and getting applauses from everyone. She smiled lightly.

"Arizona!", Teddy's voice brought her out of her reverie. She turned her head and was faced with a lot of knew faces. One familiar face captured her attention. Her heart skipped a beat in surprise. She knew there was a possibility of Dr. Torres being here. If she was being honest with herself, that was probably the reason she had decided to come. She didn't know why seeing the woman was a valid reason to get out of the comfort of her house. But here she was, in front of her and her beautiful complexion gave her the answer she needed.

She held her gaze on the expressive brown eyes she saw for the first time almost a week ago. "Arizona?!", Teddy called to get her attention.

"Oh, sorry", she said when she was finally able to take her eyes from the woman, her image still burning on her mind while she looked at everybody else. She greeted everyone, Teddy introducing them by their names. There was this man, she didn't really know what to think about him. But whatever it came to be, it wouldn't be anything good. He had a smirk on his face while looking at her. It was uncomfortable to have his eyes on her, as if he knew more than he should. But refused to look away. It wasn't an easy task to intimidate Arizona Robbins.

"And this is Callie Torres."

"Miss Robbins!" That was when her attention was brought back to the brunette.

"Do you guys know each other?", Teddy asked, curious, as she saw the distinct look of recognition in Callie's face.

"Yes. Dr. Torres was Julie's doctor when she was shot."

"It's Callie. You can call me Callie. We are out of the hospital." Callie was face to face with the woman. She thanked whichever God out there, that she had thrown some drinks down her throat by now. Otherwise se wouldn't be able to even move. Arizona was beautiful the first time she met her, in a brown leather skirt and a beige blouse, but today? Well, today she was something else. Light blue skinny jeans, white vans and a black simple shirt, hair up in a ponytail. If she wasn't seeing it with her own eyes, she wouldn't believe that someone like her was dressed like that. She wouldn't ever doubt, though, that the woman would be beautiful wearing anything.

"Well, Callie. It's nice seeing you again." Arizona's voice was soft and calm, even if her hands going inside the back pockets of her jeans, showed a sign of discomfort or hesitance.

"I'm glad you came." Callie gave her a big smile, hoping to ease the clear tension in the other woman's demeanor. She got a little smile back. And for now that small smile was enough.

"So, blondie… How are you this fine night?" That was obviously Mark, he didn't get any response, though. Arizona looked at everyone but him.

"I think he is talking to you", the beautiful brunette stated.

"Well, I only attend to Miss Robbins or Arizona", Arizona joked. Actually, no, it wasn't a joke. All the people in the table found it funny, though, because she could hear everyone laughing. Everyone but Mark.

"Alright, what does everyone wants to drink? I'm heading to the bar to bring us some booze." Owen got up from his stool and clapped his hands, waiting for his friends requests.

"I'll go with another tequila." So, she is the wild kind of girl, concluded Arizona, smiling to herself.

"Beer, beer, beer!" Those were Mark, Cristina and Lexie.

"Some vodka", "Yes, I'll go with vodka too", Bailey and Teddy said.

Owen looked at Arizona expectantly. "A glass of white wine."

Owen went to the bar and Arizona was suddenly completely lost. There wasn't a chair or stool for her to sit. She didn't know how to initiate a conversation with those people. Not about anything she thought would interest them. She averted her eyes to the stage. This blonde girl started singing a terrible version of Toxic, by Britney. She laughed at the woman and as soon as her laugh died, she was sure she was being observed. There was this feeling as if someone was staring hard at her profile. She could easily turn around and smile to whom she was sure was the owner of deepest brown eyes she had ever seen. But then, what? She was completely out of practice in terms of flirting, or even getting to know people. It had been too long. And when she wanted a quick lay, she didn't really have to put too much effort on getting to know them. There was barely any talk in those encounters, anyway. But this was different. Because Callie, well… Callie's presence made her feel different, in a really unsettling way. And, apparently, the confident woman she was didn't come to the party when Callie was at the party. A few minutes later, she felt the relief and the agony of being 'left alone'. There were no eyes on her. She took a deep breath and focused on the stage again. Much to her surprise, it was a man who was singing now, the chorus of a song. She didn't know where the beginning of the song had went, she was just too lost in thought.

"Well, we're here to celebrate, so let's make a toast to Callie's brilliance!" Owen said, giving everyone their drinks. She turned back to the people and grabbed her white wine, risking a quick glance Callie's way. She was laughing, with this captivating glow shining on the skin of her amused and embarrassed face.

"Come on, guys. It's only the first step."

"To the first step no one has ever taken." Mark raised his glass, encouraging all of them to do the same.

"To the first step!", they toasted.

Callie looked at her and smiled, before washing her tequila down her throat. She made a face, squeezing her eyes shut, what Arizona found weirdly cute.

"What are they talking about?", Arizona asked Teddy, curious about the reason why she was here, celebrating Callie.

"She just made synthetic cartilage from scratch."

"Wow!" It was interesting to observe moments like this. An extraordinary fact being celebrated in a really ordinary way. Extraordinary people behaving like ordinary people. She liked it, the normality of the scene unfolding before her eyes. They could be any group of friends, having drinks to acknowledge the fact that one of them got a promotion, for example. It was one of the things she missed from her young years. Her normal friends, attending to normal parties with normal people. She missed the joking around, the silly faces. For years, now, she had to deal with people in such a formal way that it seemed she had forgotten about how to really just be herself in front of everyone.

Her job had completely consumed her life. In a way that the parties she went were beneficent or media events. The late night calls were from clients living the other side of the country and not from her best friend to just talk or a lover telling her she was missed. Her time on the computer was to work, not to have a little fun browsing around on youtube, an old hobby of hers. There were just a few people who could bring her back to her old self and only in really rare occasions. And getting to that conclusion here, now, made her feel completely lost.

"Yeah. She is something else."

"She seems to be", Arizona simply declared, taking a sip of her wine as she observed Callie putting her hand over Mark's extended one. The man pulling her towards the dance floor. The karaoke was over and people started to get together in couples and small groups to dance. She was all of a sudden completely out of her lamentations because the ortho surgeon started to move in a way that made it impossible for her eyes to look somewhere else. The red dress she was wearing making her hips sway attractively. Arizona bit on her lips, thinking about what she had chosen to wear tonight. She felt ridiculous. Everyone around was dressed casually, much like herself. It didn't help her unexpected insecurity, though. What was it about this woman that made her feel this way?

She drunk more of her wine and forced herself to look away. Turned her attention to the other people in the table she sat where Callie was sitting before, engaging in a light conversation with Teddy's friends for about half an hour. They were nice. Miranda, the general surgeon, had this hilarious sarcasm in her sentences. Owen was a serious guy and she couldn't help but notice Teddy's googly eyes towards him now and then. Cristina was just plain weird. And Lexie was sweet. She pitied the girl, though, because she couldn't take her own eyes from Mark and Callie dancing. It was clear she had a major crush on him.

She avoided looking in their direction. But it became impossible when some kind of electronic salsa started to play. And there was her, dancing like a freaking competitor in that Dance with the Stars TV show, black hair flying when Mark started spinning her really fast. Yeah, fuck. She drunk the last of her wine and busied her shaky hands on drawing circles on the edge or her glass.

"You're staring!", Teddy's voice sounded in her ear after a minute.

"Can't help it", she chuckled. Teddy following.

"Why don't you go there and ask her for a dance? I know you want to." Her friend's voice was back on her ear, like the voice of the little demon inside her head.

"Can't deny it." The friends laughed together at Arizona's honest admission. "She's having a good time with him and I'm a terrible dancer." The blonde stopped the motion her fingers were doing on the glass and turned her body to Teddy, sighing deeply. "Besides, I'm about to go home."

"Maybe invite another woman to dance?" Teddy knew Arizona hadn't been involved with anyone for quite some time. She didn't want to push more than she already had, because her friend had never reacted well to anyone trying to take control of her life, but this was just a small intervention. She could try, right?

"I don't dance, Teddy."

"You did before." The blonde surgeon declared, knowing well her friend would instantly remember that one time they danced half naked, with a bottle of wine in each of their hands, after Arizona ended things with Camille.

"Yeah! That was fun." She smiled, reminiscing. "But really, I should go home. It's a week day, Tedds!"

"Who cares?"

"I do... I have an early morning." She put the empty glass on the table and took a 10 dollar bill out of her pocket.

* * *

"She's staring at you", Mark half yelled over the loud music.

"Who?", Callie yelled back, before Mark pulled her closer, his hands moving with her hips from behind.

"Blondie."

"Don't call her that. She doesn't like it." She said, fighting the urge to look towards their table and see the blonde.

"She is staring at you, didn't you get that?" Strong hands turned her around to look directly at him.

"Why does it matter?"

"Why does it matter?", he laughed snaking his hands on her waist and swaying their bodies together. "You don't know how to play it cool, Torres. Your movements are suddenly very unstable."

"My movements are always on point", she cockily declared, regaining the control over her body.

"She likes woman, you know?"

"She doesn't."

"She does. And If I'm correct, she likes your movements alright." The smirk on his face started to get her annoyed. She just wanted to dance. This was a good night, a fun night. She wanted to enjoy it. She didn't want to worry about people looking at her. She just wanted to get loose.

"Stop being a pig, Mark. Just dance."

"Want me to start conversation with her for you?" He was kidding, right? She laughed hard.

"No."

"You want it, Torres."

"You're terrible at starting conversations, Mark."

"That's where you always go wrong, you know, Torres?" Mark said in a serious tone, as he brought her closer and danced slowly, while hugging his best friend. "You always fall in love before you actually know the person. You get your expectations high and then you have your heart broken." The song was anything but slow, but his arms were comforting, his worlds were true and the alcohol was starting to get the best of her. She laid her head on his chest and sighed, trying to maintain her balance. "Just have fun once or twice. Don't fall." As if it was that easy. She wasn't in love, though. Not yet, at least. It was too soon. Even for her. She couldn't, deny, though, that her body always got instantly warm when she heard about the woman or saw her face. Magazine or real life.

"We're the complete opposites. You are the person someone gets high expectations about only to have their heart broken. I've seen the way Lexie looks at you." At her declaration, his arms tightened around her. "We're both losers, so shut up."

"True." He laughed on her hair. Depositing a kiss on her head.

* * *

The song soon ended and they came back to the table to see an annoyed Arizona discussing something with Teddy, a dollar bill being put on the table.

"You're going already?" Inhibition, something Callie was trying to maintain after her 4 tequila shot. She was bathed in the glow of the blue eyes as the woman turned her head after hearing her voice.

"Yeah. I work early tomorrow", the blonde shrugged.

"Would you… Why don't you stay a bit more? We didn't have the opportunity to talk." Nice one, Callie. For someone as tipsy as you are right now, that was a smart move. She saw Arizona slightly open her mouth and then close it. Her hands were back in her pockets.

"Oh...", she simply said after a few more seconds.

Callie didn't give her time to think of anything else to say. "Just one drink more." She seemed to ponder. All of her friends were already looking at them expectantly.

"Okay." The small smile on the blondes face was unsure, her body relaxed when Callie smiled back at her.

"You sit back there. I'll grab the drinks. White wine, right?"

"Yes, please."

Callie was now more confident in herself. She had dreaded this moment since the blonde arrived, because that beautiful woman sitting in a bar stool in Joe's was Arizona Robbins. Even if she didn't have any clue about what the name meant to the world, she knew the blonde was a big deal. Would she even pay her any attention? Would she be interested in what Callie had to offer in a conversation? She didn't know, but she was ready to find out. There was just something in the way she smiled. And she wanted to see more of that.

While Callie was at the bar, getting them both a glass of white wine, she looked at the table. Miranda was on the phone, instantly getting her purse, telling everyone her goodbyes and walking out of the bar, phone still on her ear. That was odd. She made a note to text her later. Cristina had already too much and was weirdly sleeping on Lexie's shoulder. Owen and mark were laughing at something while looking at the dance floor. The man behind the counter gave her the drinks and she sighed, making her way back to where she left Arizona waiting.

"So, you and Teddy know each other for long?", Callie asked after she gave Arizona her glass and sat in front of her. Even if the question was just an easy way to start conversation, she was indeed interested.

"Since we were kids. We lived in a military base together." She saw Teddy nodding her head, before taking a sip of her vodka.

"That's nice. To have a friend for that long." The oldest friend Callie had was still living in Miami. She didn't know anything about her anymore. It had been a long time since they had talked. And she thought that it would be cool to have had her by her side after she came to LA. She had lived a lot of hard stuff here. And good stuff too. All of it deserved to be lived with someone by her side, she thought.

"Eh, with Teddy I don't really know." The mischievous look on Arizona's face was amusing and quite cute. The blonde avoided looking at Teddy after saying it, chuckling to herself when she felt her friend nudging her on the shoulder.

"Heeey, I'm a good friend", declared Teddy, her voice feigning hurt.

A tall slender figure approached them, by Teddy's side and extended a hand to her. "A dance?", offered Owen with a charming smile. Yeah. There was definitely something there. She didn't want to speculate, though. Owen was in a very serious relationship with Cristina.

"Sure!" The blonde surgeon followed the lead of her dance partner with a smile, leaving them basically alone. Lexie too engrossed on something on her phone and Mark at the bar, getting more to drink. There was this silent staring contest between them after being alone, none of them knowing how to keep the conversation going. There were a lot of things she wanted to know about Arizona. But she didn't know how to start talking. The blue eyes burring on her started making her uncomfortable, so she averted her eyes to look at the beverage in her right hand.

"So, you're this big surgeon who makes cartilage out of nothing, huh?" The blonde's voice seemed excited about the subject and it was enough for Callie to smile and look back at her. She was proud of herself. It would be a big step in her career.

"I'm still a resident. You know that. I just... I have been having a lot of free time", she shrugged. It was partially true. After Erica left, Callie just couldn't spend her free time at home. That would end up with her thinking about the other woman and she didn't want to think about her. Like she didn't want to think about her now, while talking to the woman in front of her. She deserved her attention.

"Being a resident? You have free time?", Arizona incredulously questioned.

"Yeah. Sleeping at home is overrated." Arizona laughed, Callie's own laugh following. "And you, queen of the kick ass commercials?"

"Oh, so you know who I am." The blonde seemed more comfortable in her element now. Maybe because they were alone? She would like to think so.

"Barely", Callie faked a pout. "Unfortunately…"

"Well, I do work with marketing. And I write books."

"A writer! That's charming." It was indeed really charming. An image of Arizona wearing only a big loose shirt, hair in a bun, sitting on a chair in front of the computer, one leg up, while her glass covered eyes concentrated in the words of the bright screen in a dark room came to her mind. It was disturbing in a really pleasant way. The alcohol she had was not able to make her completely drunk. But her mind was definitely slightly altered.

"Yes, it gets the ladies attention", Arizona smiled and drank more of her wine.

"So, blondie..." Idiot Mark spoke, stopping by Callie's side. The brunette gave him a death glare. He didn't mind it one bit, it seemed. The alcohol was starting to get the best of him too. "A bird told us you deprived all of LA of being graced with your beauty by burning all of those magazines."

What the fuck? Is he crazy? Before she could say anything, Arizona started talking in a really serious tone and an icy glare. "The bird told you right. Unfortunately, there is no way of depriving the world of your useless existence, is it?"

Callie chocked on her drink. This was the second time she was choking on drinks because of the same woman. She couldn't help but laugh, though. Her laugh was immediately replaced by disappointment as she saw the blonde put her glass on the table and start to stand.

"Callie, it was nice talking to you", she said, looking directly at her. "I hope we can see more of each other soon. Have a good night. And congratulations on your cartilage." And just like that she started her way towards the exit.

"Arizona, wait!", Callie almost screamed over the loud noises in the bar. Mark completely forgotten, she walked to the blonde woman.

"What?" That was clearly annoyance in her face.

"You don't have to go because of him. He's… An idiot." She apologized for her friend.

"A man would never make me do what I don't want to do, Callie." The latina tried not to get offended by Arizona's tone.

"You don't want to stay and talk?", she insisted, trying not to sound too desperate. But she needed to somehow make fix things for the blonde. And it wasn't fair that Mark got to ruin what was starting to be an interesting conversation.

"I... I have work early tomorrow." Her voice was softer now and it was all the encouragement Callie needed.

"Aren't you the boss? I mean, you can go in whatever time you want, don't you? When the reason you're late is a valid reason..." That may be presumptuous of Callie to think she was a valid reason for the woman to stay and be late for work the next day. But hey, she had to try. When Arizona said nothing, she insisted one more time. That would be her last attempt. "20 minutes?"

"Did you see the pictures?", Arizona asked when they took a seat in a free table closer to the bar's door.

"Yes. I've seen them", Callie honestly answered.

"Great!" Arizona was uncomfortable again and Callie didn't know what it was all about. The way Arizona seemed to be okay for a couple minutes and then get tense.

"They were, actually." That wasn't supposed to get out of her mouth. But again, inhibition was something she was trying hard to maintain.

"They weren't supposed to be out." It was obvious they weren't, and both of them knew about that. She understood Arizona's need to reinforce that information, though.

"I know. But well, they are. There is no changing that. It's past, anyway. Soon nobody will remember it." It was supposed to be comforting to the blonde to know that soon no one would remember it. Except that… "I mean, not that you aren't memorable. Yeah. You are definitely memorable. People wouldn't forget you. Not in pictures like that, anyway. But, yeah... soon it won't be the news of the moment." Yeah, tequila and wine? Not a good combination. She was starting to embarrass herself and think that insisting on the other woman to stay wasn't that good of an idea when she was more than half way into a completely drunk state. The blonde didn't seem fazed, though. Giving her a small smile, instead, before getting serious again.

"I like having my privacy kept."

"I'm sure it's annoying having your intimacy go public like that, yes." Callie sighed heavily and concentrated in looking into the blue eyes to steady herself. They were gorgeous and there was never a possibility that looking at those eyes would make her concentrate. But all of the opposite.

"It's not that. Not only that, anyway. I have a big company, people who matter know who I am and what I do. I have a great job, I do what I love, I earn more money than I need by doing it. But I'm a normal person. I was, at least. I had the best of both worlds. The success and the anonymity. Now, everybody in LA knows who I am. People who 'don't matter'. Like I didn't matter to them. Even if they watched 30 of my commercials every year, the person behind them, in this case me, didn't matter to them. And now, just because there are pictures of me half naked out there, I will start to matter. Not because of my commercials or the books, but because of those pictures. And that is all I always tried to avoid. That's one thing I wanted to avoid for as long as I live. So, this is what truly makes me pissed about it. Not just because now I can have pictures taken of me while I get the newspaper from my front door wearing pajamas!"

It made sense. She understood now why Mark's comment bothered her so much. It wasn't really about the pictures. It was about her work, which she concluded by the brief interaction, was the most important thing in the blonde's life. "I'm sorry about it...", she said sincerely. Trying to lighten the mood, she thought of something. "Do you want to tell me some of the commercials you did this last year so I can remember you for being the queen of TV commercials instead of the beautiful woman in the magazine cover?" The blonde's face was still serious, but that little curve on her lips was definitely the beginning of a smile. "Come on. All I know about you is that you have a big company, you're Teddy's friend, your assistant was my patient and that you totally kicked Mark's ass right there, by the way." Mark was well used to have people calling him out. But what had just happened was something else entirely. "What makes me like you already! So, tell me more so I can remember you for other things beside that."

"Uh…", Arizona hesitated, sighing and resting her body on the back of the chair, as if pondering what she could tell or not. This woman was hard to get to know, what only made Callie want to know her more.

"I can start. That way you will remember me as more than your assistant's doctor", she offered, sending precaution out of the window. Mark said she never really got to know the person before she fell in love, right? She could try making things different this time around. If only Arizona let her brake the first layer of her walls. "I was born in Cuba. Came to The States at age 5. Which means I speak Spanish. I still talk to my parents in Spanish. Or talked, I don't know anymore because they refuse to talk to me these days." That was definitely too much information, but right now she was past the stage of being careful and walking on eggshells with people. "All I did my whole life was study. Dance classes, singing classes, piano classes, medicine. I lived in Miami almost my whole life. I came to LA for med School. And here I am..." All the while she was talking, Arizona just stood there, listening, surprisingly interested on her half-drunk rambling.

"Piano?", she asked, almost startling the brunette, because she thought she would have to continue talking for at least five more minutes, until the blonde was tired of her and said her goodbyes.

"I only play a little bit. It was my favorite instrument growing up. I took lessons for almost 8 years. "

"I love piano solos." That piece an important piece of information, Callie thought. One more thing she knew about the blonde and hoped to remember tomorrow when she woke up. "It isn't you favorite anymore?"

"I still like the piano, but I started appreciating other stuff too. So, to this day, I like it all." She saw Arizona nodding in understanding. They didn't have their drinks anymore and Callie was now very aware of the fact she didn't know what to do with her hands and didn't have the alcohol to somehow distract her from the way her body was reacting to the blonde's presence. "Your turn..." She tried passing the ball to Arizona's court. She didn't bite the bait, though. She just looked directly into her brown eyes and grinned, the blonde's hands resting in her lap while she shook her leg viciously. "Come on. I'm not a paparazzi trying to gather more information about you to go in the new edition of a gossip magazine." If she had she opportunity to hear what she had just said she was sure she would conclude that her tone had come out slightly irritated. But it seemed to work, when Arizona started talking.

"Okay. Hum... I grew up everywhere since I am a marine brat. Germany, Japan and all around The States." Impressive, Callie thought. But it still looked like Arizona was searching on her head for things about her that Callie could easily find in internet. She did understand it. And anything she got to know from the blondes own mouth, she would be happy with.

"You speak german?"

"Not anymore. It's a hard language and I don't practice, so..."

"Japanese?"

"That even less…", she chuckled. A chuckle was a good reward after all of the effort she had put on talking to this woman.

"What are your books about?

"Women, homossexuality, the influence of media on people's lives!" Mark was right, then? Arizona liked women? She didn't like reading, but right now she knew she needed to read the books. Maybe it would be a much easier way to get to know Arizona.

"Does Teddy have them?"

"This is looking like the twenty questions game", Arizona joke.

"I'm taking advantage of the fact that you finally decided to let me get to know a little bit about you." Her honest declaration was rewarded with a bigger smile, dimples and all, much to Callie's enchantment.

"All of them, yes! I'm not sure if she has read them, though! They're probably just accumulating mold on her shelf." There wasn't even a little bit of resentment on Arizona's voice. She was actually amused by the fact.

"Her loss!"

"You don't know about that."

"I don't. But I do, somehow."

"Well, thank you."

Silence took over them for longer than a minute. She watched Arizona for a few moments, while she pretended to listen to the song playing. There was this weird atmosphere around them. But she didn't really want it to be over. The music came to an end and the bar was silent for an instant. That was when Arizona looked at her watch and blue eyes smiled apologetically in Callie's direction, as she started moving from where she was seated.

"I really have to go, now."

"Oh, alright."

"I'm sorry." It was a sincere apology. Callie knew she had done everything wrong, but the other woman still seemed truly sorry for having to go.

"It's okay", Callie stood from her own seat, getting closer to Arizona.

"Congratulations on your cartilage, Callie. It is truly brilliant. I'm sure you will succeed and I'll be watching you on TV talking all about how you changed medicine." She talked in a way that made Callie believe it herself, all the while holding her arm.

"I hope you're right."

"I'm always right", she said cockily. Walking away in Teddy's direction, probably to tell her she was leaving, the blonde waved a "Bye", her dimples popping again. Not a minute later, Arizona walked out of the bar, living Callie alone and aware of the fact that she actually was alone. Not only in the moment, but in the world. Taking her cellphone out of her pocket, she did something she was trying really hard not to do since two days ago. Her fingers quickly typed a message and she hit the send button. Things had to change.

*So, I have a niece and you didn't tell me?*

 _"_ _Hopeless_

 _Everybody says it's just another decay of the soul_

 _But I know I'm hopeless, follower of anything to take me_

 _Away from this hole in the ground."_

 _(Hopeless - KT Tunstall)_

 **AN** : This chapter is dedicated to a special friend. She knows who she is. Originally, it was supposed to have three more scenes in it. But since it was getting too big, you will only see those three scenes in the next chapter. What I tried to do here, in their second meeting, was to bring the normal insecurity we feel when we meet someone we actually have interest in being in some kind of relationship with. Callie's insecurity comes from the fact that she had her heart broken twice not so long ago. But Callie is Callie, always impulsive. Arizona's insecurity comes from the fact that Callie somehow makes her feel different from all the other times she liked a woman. She recognizes it as more than attraction and none of her previous relationships started that way. Besides, she is living a really busy time in work.

Also, do you guys recognize the singer of the song in this chapter? I love KT Tunstall so much. A lot of her songs. I actually got to know her music before I started watching Grey's Anatomy, back in the 2007. That's long ago, huh? Oh, and I opened a twitter account recently. So, follow me there, if you would like. thewreckedship

I would like to thank the new people who reviewed the last chapter; it's really nice to have you here commenting on my story. And I missed some of the ones who previously reviewed, your absence was noticed. I really hope you guys liked this chapter and, as usual, I answered all the reviews in the review section.

What will happen next? Let me hear what you think?


	5. Chapter 5: Oh, you

**Chapter 5: Oh, you**

 _"_ _And I know you carry a sense of weariness I see_

 _You're the one I'm wanting with the plainest clarity_

 _Turning in me, burning in me"_

Tim was going to be back home today. Today! He would be landing in LA at noon, after a two year deployment. Emmy and their parents had come to LA to meet him at the airport. Only two months away from his wedding, he had decided it would be better com come here instead of their parents' home in Boston. Besides, he just couldn't be away of his fiancé anymore.

Arizona couldn't contain her excitement. She had woken up before the alarm clock and since she wouldn't be going to work today she decided to run outside in the open. It was a monday, early morning. There were only a few people at the Los Angeles State Historic Park, most of them doing exercises and walking their dogs. It had been a long time since she had had time during the week to run outside the walls of her own home instead of in a treadmill. She only realized how she had missed it when she stepped out of her car and looked around. It was refreshing. There was a lot of green, spring had just knocked LA's door.

She walked around for a bit and started a small warm up before actually start running. She made her way to the other side and run a bit around the Elysium Park, making her way back, half an hour before. It had been almost forty minutes since she arrived and she was back to State Historic Park. One more lap and she would head home to start getting ready to meet her parents and go to the airport. Stopping for a minute to drink some water, she took a deep breath and grabbed the small towel hanging from her tight gym pants. She was sweating profusely. Arizona LOVED LA, but she was definitely a winter girl. How to cope with it when you live in a city which is very hot more than half of the year and only chilly for a three months period?

She wiped the salty drops from her face and sighed, almost jumping when she opened her eyes and was met with a clear vision of someone she hadn't thought about in more than a month. There, sitting on a bench looking completely exhausted was one Dr. Torres. Arizona felt her whole body get tense. She was frozen in the spot. After that day at the bar, she had went home feeling like an idiot for the way she had acted. She felt like rusty iron, because she didn't know how to act around this woman. Should she go there and talk to her? Or just go home?

It was then that Callie looked her way. Recognition hitting her face, the brunette smiled a little. There was Arizona's answer. Now she just had to go there and say hi. Not that she didn't want to talk to Callie. She did. But she was wearing gym clothes and was sweaty and probably stinky. How much would that impress the other woman?

She took a deep breath and walked towards the other brunette. Okay. Let's do this. Approaching the young surgeon, Arizona noticed she was wearing scrub pants and a purple t-shirt with a pair of grey snickers. She laughed a little at it because, well, suddenly she didn't feel so bad about how she was dressed. It didn't matter, though. Because even with the dark circles around her eyes and the messy hair, Callie was just as beautiful as the Callie wearing that red dress two months ago.

"Would you like to sit for a bit?" A half of a smile was in the brunette's lips, over her super tired, but beautiful face.

Answering the surgeon with a smile of her own, she sat beside her, following the dark eyes to where they were looking to a group of young girls laughing while standing in the middle of the grass. A small Chihuahua was running crazy around them.

"It's a nice place here." It was very clear there was something bothering Callie. It wasn't just anything. The sadness on her face made Arizona feel like she was the one who needed to initiate the conservation even if it had been Callie who invited her to sit.

"It is."

"Maybe I should start running outdoors again." She really should. It had brought her not only a feeling of complete relaxation, but to an encounter with Callie and she was thankful for both.

"I think you should." Callie had yet to look at her again. Figuring the other woman needed some time to actually start talking, Arizona just sat there and looked around, enjoying the silent presence of the beautiful woman. She wondered what was on her mind and came to the conclusion that she didn't know Callie not even near enough to have the slightest clue about what usually went through her mind.

Finally, her voice was heard, small and apologetic. "I'm sorry. I'm just tired. I... I asked for your company and now I'm being a terrible company for you."

Now looking directly into the dark eyes, Arizona could see they were lightly painted in red. She guessed it was from crying and her chest constricted at the thought. "You're not being a terrible company. You're saving me from running 1 more mile." The joke earned her a small laugh.

"Don't you like running?" It was a simple question, but Arizona was still looking at small smile on Callie's face. It was very distracting to be sat so close to her, her features now much more visible, much more enchanting.

"I do. But right now it feels like an obligation." Who would ever prefer running over having a conversation with this woman? Callie averted her eyes from Arizona again. The blonde wondered if it was because she didn't know how to answer or because of whatever was bothering her this morning.

"Wanna tell me what's clearly bothering you?" Arizona asked, turning her body to sit looking directly at Callie's profile, she brought her right leg up and supported her head on her hand, her curved arm on the bench's backrest.

"Does the running feel more like an obligation than listening to me?" Arizona watched Callie turn herself to imitate her position on the bench.

"You're not on my list of obligations today, no." Now, face to face again, Arizona didn't know where on Callie's face to concentrate her eyes. There was this cold feeling in her stomach, like when you're driving your car and there is a big declivity on the avenue. It was as scary as it was good. And it was really good. Today felt different than the last time they met. Maybe because right now, this ambient and their clothes didn't represent more than two supposed friends talking. Right now, it felt like there were no expectations on their "relationship", and that made Arizona more comfortable in Callie's presence. Besides all of that, their friends weren't there, with prying eyes, ready to insinuate things. Because even if Arizona knew there was something there, she didn't know what it was and she didn't know if she was ready to find out. "I would actually like to apologize for how I treated you that night. I wasn't very... pleasant."

"It's alright. I wasn't that good of a companion either. Drunky me is not my best side." Callie declared, laughing while trying to restrain a strand of hair behind her ear; the wind making the task a hard one. And then, there was silence again. Their conversations were full of it. But it wasn't entirely bad, she was starting to think. It wasn't a weird silence. It was more like them, immersed in their thoughts, trying to put them into words. "I just got out of a 36 hours shift."

"And you chose to stay awake and come here because..." Arizona would sleep late and have only a few hours to rest at night, but she would never understand how people working in the hospitals made it through day and night, 24, 48 hours shifts. It was crazy.

"I lost 3 patients in the ER last night." Callie was looking so intensely at her right now that she could almost feel what the brunette was feeling. She couldn't bring herself to look away, though. "Two brothers and a friend of them who was traveling with their family. They were 9 years old kids." That last sentence came out in a chocked voice, breaking Arizona's heart in the process. She could see Callie's nose starting to get red. If it wasn't sad, it would be extremely cute.

"I'm sorry." It was all she could say. And she truly was sorry. For the kids' lives and for the obvious impact their death had had on Callie.

"Don't be. It's not the first time it happens. But it never gets easier. And I know I'm just beginning. Thinking about the next patients that will die on my watch terrifies me, right now." Callie was clearly shaken, her eyes now collecting stubborn tears, refusing to fall. She watched her take a deep breath and concentrate not to cry. Arizona was pleased by the fact that Callie confided her with her feelings about a hard case, a difficult day, a sad loss. And without needing more time with the other woman, Arizona knew, just by this moment, that Callie wore her heart on her sleeve.

"I know doctors tend to think that they have control over everything. But nothing happens solely because of one person. If someone dies, it's not only because of one doctor. If they are cured, it is not only one doctor that contributes to that."

"I know." Arizona knew Callie knew that. But maybe she just needed to hear it from someone else. Reassurance. Everyone needed that at some point in their lives.

"I understand why you're upset, though. It's not like you lost the contract deal of your dreams. Three children lost their dreams and that weights more on someone's shoulder." She paused to gauge on Callie's reaction to her words. She just nodded and kept looking at her as if waiting for more. "But as you said, you're just beginning, and I think that you should look ahead for the ones you can save in the future."

The young surgeon wiped her tears, impeding them to fall, and gave Arizona a small smile. "You lost the contract deal of your dreams?" That was the last thing Arizona expected to come out of her mouth.

"No. I actually just signed it. I was just thinking about how I'd be feeling if I hadn't got it. And losing three kids has no comparison to it."

"Well, congratulations."

"Thanks." The contract was a big deal, a pretty big deal, but this wasn't the right moment to brag about it. Their conversation was interrupted by the loud noise of a small boy screaming, chasing after a dog three times his size. They laughed and watched the kid play for a little bit.

"I've read some stuff about you these last months since we met. Your work is amazing."

What? Callie had read about her? Well, it wasn't that big of a deal, right? There were stuff on internet about her, interviews on magazines… She couldn't contain her surprise, though, and looked back to the tanned face. "You've read about me?"

"Since we met, it was like you were everywhere I went." Callie said before laughing, still looking at the kid. A blush was clearly evident on her cheek. "I saw something on TV, some other stuff on a magazine at the hospital. And one of your books was the first thing I saw in my last trip to Barnes and Nobles."

"I feel in disadvantage." That would be because she was in disadvantage. It was her own fault, but still…

"We could make that disadvantage disappear." Was that flirting? It was flirting… She may not know how to do it anymore, but she did know how to recognize it. Callie was flirting with her, right after crying in front of her. Arizona internally laughed at the prospect of a flirty banter with her. It was refreshing. The sadness and exhaustion momentarily forgotten, the small smirk on the full red lips made her insides turn.

"Is that an invitation for me to ask whatever I want?" Arizona tentatively asked.

"Maybe..."

"Maybe?"

"Each question I answer gives me one more minute with you here. Does that sound fair?" There was no denying she was currently witnessing Callie in her flirtatious mode, after losing three kids in a 36 hours shift, wearing scrubs and a "I just cried" face. It was adorably perfect, somehow. The effort this woman put into having her as a company.

"I should be the one proposing you that since you look like you're about to sleep here on this bench."

"Do I look that bad?" The fact that Callie hadn't given the circumstances a second thought made Arizona laugh.

"I didn't say it was bad… At all." In fact, it was a pretty good vision of what Callie was in a normal day, normal life. That was how she liked to get to know people. She hated appearances.

"Okay. First question?"

Let's start with the basics. "How old are you?"

"Seriously?" Callie asked confuse, as if wanting to know if it was a real question or if Arizona was just playing with her.

She had been wanting to know how old was Callie all along, since the first day they met. It didn't matter to Arizona. It's just that the way Callie behaved made the blonde a little confused. She was a great surgeon. Someone needed to be a mature person to be able to do what Callie did for a living every day. At the same time, she seemed carefree and impulsive, like every young woman used to be.

"What? I'm sure you know how many years ago I was born, since you've read about me."

"31", Callie answered with a smirk, clearly not ashamed by the fact that she had been stalking the blonde.

"So?", Arizona pushed.

Callie's face was invaded with something that seemed like fear and frustration as she answered, "I'm about to turn 30." Yeah, the thirties would do that to someone.

"Oh, well, once you're 30..." Arizona didn't quite know what she wanted to say with that. She just thought that being thirty would feel different.

"Aren't you enjoying your 30?" There was a frown on the brunettes' forehead as she questioned, denoting true curiosity and a bit of concern.

"Not as much as I thought I would." Most of the things she planned to conquer at her thirties, she had already accomplished. But she didn't feel as she thought she would being where she was now, in life.

"Why is that?", Callie asked and Arizona smiled at her eagerness in keeping the conversation going, even when her eyes were almost dropping every two minutes.

"Hey, I should be the one making the questions." Arizona didn't want to talk about how suffocated she felt these days with every aspect of her life.

"Right! You're right", Callie agreed, while changing her position on the bench, sitting completely straight. It was adorable to see how sleepy she was, but resisting bravely. Arizona decided to play a little with her.

"What are your thoughts about feminism?" Callie made and "what?" face, but Arizona just stood, waiting for an answer.

"Hum... Many. Would I even be here without it? Would you? That was a really random question."

"There are just some important things I really need to know about you." It was true, but at the same time, she thought it would be funny to see an exhausted and sleepy Callie trying to elaborate her thoughts about important matters.

"Oh, yeah?"

"Yes."

"You didn't seem so keen on getting to know me the other night", the latina mocked.

"I've already apologized for that."

"And I won't hold any grudges against you."

This conversation here, in a bench of a park, early morning on a Sunday, going in all directions imaginable. It was nice and natural. And she could imagine herself talking to Callie for long hours.

"Good. What is your opinion about breastfeeding?" Another tricky question to make Callie struggle.

"Essential?" Arizona laughed. Because it was adorable how she tried to give the right answer but in the most simple way.

"And what about maternity leave?"

"Well, I'm sure three months is not enough."

"Trump?"

"I'm just hopefully waiting for an impeachment." Callie was good at this game. Arizona gave her a pause and took a moment to admire her. She really was beautiful, sitting cross-legged, hands resting on her lap, concentrated as if waiting for the next question. It didn't come, though, because Arizona was the one who suddenly couldn't concentrate very well. "Don't you have any more weird questions?"

Being brought out of her reverie, she smiled. She couldn't believe in what she was going to do right now. "My list of weird questions goes on forever. But I have only one more for now."

"Shoot it."

"Would you like to have a coffee with me?" That was easier than she thought it would be considering it had been years since she last invited a woman to a "date". Wait, that wouldn't be really a date, right?

"Now?"

"Yeah? I mean... It's early in the morning, a good time for coffee." Is it a good time for coffee when your companion is clearly super tired and sleepy after two days of work? She started questioning herself. She just put herself out there and now she was sure she would fail because the circumstances wouldn't help her at all. "And I have some more weird questions for later…" Yet, she buried her grave deeper.

"Hm... Yeah. I..." Callie started, being interrupted by the sound of her pager going off. At this point she didn't know if the object had saved her from embarrassing herself or stopped her from going for coffee with the beautiful surgeon. And because of that, she didn't know if she felt relieved or disappointed.

"I'm sorry, I really have to go. It's a 911 from the hospital." Callie started standing up after checking her pager.

"It's okay. I understand", Arizona said, standing on her feet too, trying to find what to do with her hands. Usually, she would put her hands on her pockets when she was nervous, apprehensive or uncomfortable. She saw Callie gathering her bag from where it rested on the bench and pulling it over her shoulder, now much more alert than in the last half an hour they had been talking. Ready to do her job.

"You know how to contact me if you want to resume this 20 weird questions game later, right?" Callie had her car keys on her hands now, playing with it. "Don't be a stranger." She smiled.

"Hey. It was you who started it."

"It was really nice seeing you again, Arizona."

"The feeling is mutual."

Arizona watched her go, giving her a last smile from over her shoulder. She thanked God she had a busy day, otherwise her mind would go crazy with what had just happened.

* * *

"TIM!"

Her brother was finally back and seeing him walk in between the people in the crowded airport was just too exciting. This man… this man was probably the person she loved the most in the whole world. She loved her parents fiercely. But Tim? Tim was her special person. The one who was always by her side, no matter what. The one with whom she shared an indescribable bond. He was the one teaching her how to walk when he was only 5, the one helping her with her first rollerblades. He stood there, by the roof, waiting to catch her when she decided she just had to fly. Tim lied about that broken vase, being punished for something she did without thinking twice. He was the one who had read the stories she wrote since she was a kid. He had held her when she cried after coming out and who first told her it was okay. It was him who encouraged her to go ahead and be confident in her first kiss with a girl.

Tim was the only person who could get anything from her. There wasn't a thing she wouldn't do for him. Because he would never ask more than he knew she could give. And because there wasn't anything he wouldn't do for her too. Her brother was the most selfless, honorable, kind hearted person to walk on earth. And now, looking directly at him after years, she knew her composure was something long gone when she almost knocked him down when jumping on him in a big hug.

He was wearing an uniform that was rough on her cheek which was resting on his chest. She felt his own cheek on her head and held him a little tighter. The blonde didn't know how long they hugged until his arms dropped from around her and he pulled back, looking at her face, a big smile on his lips.

"Hey, little sis. It looks like you've missed me a little bit." His voice sounded relived, tired and a lot more real than in a skype call.

"No. I didn't, just go back already. I've had enough." He laughed and felt her hugging him again.

Kissing her head, he looked around, instantly finding the eyes he had missed so much. For the last six years, all he had done in his life was miss people. It was probably the feeling he was most familiar with. That aching feeling of desperately wanting to be near the people you loved. Emily smiled at him, from the place she patiently waited for the sibling's moment to finish.

Tim squeezed Arizona while asking. "Will you let me hug my woman, now?" She laughed and freed him from the hug, watching him walk towards his fiancé, who now had tears in her eyes. Barbara was emotionally holding her husband's arm, watching and waiting for her turn to hug her boy.

"Hi, babe." They heard Tim say when he was finally able to hold the woman he loved.

"You're back." She sniffed on his neck, pressed against him as hard as she could.

"I am." He was back. Finally. Completely away from the hell of those hot sandy deserts and in the heaven of Emily's body.

"And in one piece."

"Yes." He laughed, not believing his own luck. Not all of them were able to come back. And not many were able to come back with no serious injuries. People would never know what he'd gone through without actually living it. There was sun, his body would sweat, no one around them for miles. Day after day after day after day. And then noises and screams and blood. Tears. Fear. There was always sun. But his heart was always cold. Not now, though. Not anymore.

"You're all mine, now." Emily's voice sounded vulnerable and scared. As if she couldn't believe that Tim being home was finally happening. As if he would disappear in the blink of an eye. He took his arms from around her shoulders and brought his strong hands to gently brush her hair, pulling it softly to make her look at him.

"I am. I love you", he declared looking into her eyes.

"I love you too." She smiled through the tears, getting a smile back from him, while he wiped her tears away.

"You've gotten even more beautiful than the last time I saw you." Each of his hands now holding her face, he pulled her in to make their lips meet in a chaste kiss. They were at the airport and the idea was to get just a little taste of his fiancé and save the best for later. But it had been years since he had savored that mouth and he just kept going for more until he didn't have any idea for how long they stood there, lips glued. He knew it had been long, though, because the sound of his mother's fake cough and Arizona's small laugh were what brought him back to reality.

"Mom." He finally acknowledged the third woman of his life, after disentangling himself from Emily and hugging the old lady.

"Oh, son. It's so good to see you", Barbara said, caressing his cheeks, the recently trimmed hair tickling her hand. "You look so tired, baby." He smiled big at the term of endearment. It didn't matter that he was a 35 years old man who had just come back from his last deployment, after serving the country. He was her baby. He hugged her tighter to the point of taking her off the ground, under protests and laughter.

"It's good to see you too, mom." He pulled her back on her feet and kissed her cheek. Tim turned to look at his father and saw the same authoritative figure he always had on, only now laced with pride and happiness.

"Dad."

"Hi, son", he said, pulling Tim in a hug and tapping his back while saying in his ear. "I'm proud of you. You served your country. Now you will get to do what I wasn't able to. You will get to be with your woman in marriage and make her happy. Every day rather than once a year."

* * *

Arizona's time with her brother was cut short right after they went to have lunch and she was now back to the VOX's building. Getting a call from a client, there was just no way she could spend more time with her family right now. It sucked, but that was life.

She had called Alex and communicated him about the problem with the client and half an hour after being in her office, Karev knocked on her door. "Hey, I thought you would take the day off to spend it with your family."

"I will, tomorrow. I can't today." She didn't take her eyes from the computer and just waited for him to come in. "Martha Roberts is driving me nuts with that freaking jewel collection. What was I thinking when I signed that contract? I thought I would be able to deal with her, make her happy and still put her on her place. I've put her on her place, but she is still not happy. She wants me to change all the script for the commercial and the slogan of the new collection. I could change it all, yes. But I refuse to put my name on anything that has the message she wants to put on it. It's ridiculous." Her hands were going crazy on the keyboard, writing the content of one of the folders to present them in three days. She had yet to decide between the two slogans she had thought about and write a new basic script for the commercial so her people could start incorporating their ideas to the concept. "So, I came here to create an entirely new concept. I will show it to her and if she is not satisfied, contract be damned, I will break it and pay whatever I have to pay to get rid of her. Crazy woman!"

Even if she was really stressed about this, she was too a little bit glad she had so many things on her mind to distract her from the event of early this morning. After Callie left her on the park, she sat there for a few more minutes, thinking about the other woman and the possibilities around them. The possibility of them being friends, the possibilities behind her feelings towards the brunette. It was clear for Arizona that she was attracted to Callie. But it wasn't only that and when in the doctor's company she was always so uncertain about how to act. Maybe it was because she wasn't sure she was ready for what she knew interacting with Callie would lead to. There was a voice in her mind telling her that she would fall for the woman if she got to know her better. And she didn't know if this was the right time for it to happen. Work was consuming these days. There was too much happening at VOX. She had signed 4 new contracts in the last two months. That meant hiring new people and dealing with what expanding a business brought. Besides all of that, her editor was pressing her about the dead line of her new book, which was supposed to come out in three months.

After two months of not hearing anything related to Callie, she thought that that would be it. She didn't ask Teddy anything about the woman. And Teddy chose to give her an out of what would be a weird conversation about a gorgeous doctor she had met twice and already had some sort of feelings for. But now here she was, unable to do her work properly because she was now and then being brought to the thought of her face. And unable to really think about Callie and figure out her feelings because she was too busy buried into work, without any clue of when she would craw back up the pile of things she had to do. She needed a break, but the break was just a mirage in her life, right now.

"Yeah, on top of that, do you remember that today is Julie's first day back?" Oh, yeah. Put that on top of everything. The circus around her pictures had calmed down. The court hearing about her case happened two weeks ago and she had won the cause.

"Yes. I'm aware", she sighed, resting her back on the chair and finally looking at her friend and co-worker.

"And?"

"And nothing? She's coming only in the afternoons for the next weeks, since she has physical therapy in the morning for yet another month. I will deal with the problem when the problem is here." Taking her feet out of her heals, she brought her trousers covered legs to cross over the chair, sitting indian style and rolled up the sleeves of her black blouse. After a brief call to Barbara to ask to bring them some coffee, she turned her attention back to Karev, now sat in front of her, cleaning a small space on her desk to put his laptop on.

"Ready to help me with this?!"

"Am I paid to do that?" She laughed at his attempt of joke.

"Yes." Because he was. He was paid a fair amount of money, more than what someone with his job would normally receive.

"Okay." He simply said, starting to work.

Three hours later, they had finished everything and Arizona quickly grabbed her things to go home. It was past 6 pm now and her family had dinner planned at her house tonight. She said her goodbyes to Karev and Barbara and walked out to the building, completely oblivious to the person who would now be occupying the desk closer to the exit.

"Arizona." She instantly recognized the voice, turning her head to look at the woman. Julie! She really didn't need this right now.

 _"_ _So converse me with a steady tone of where you've been_

 _But I know that you're a timid love beneath the skin_

 _Breaking you in, breaking you in"_

 _(St. Clarity – The Paper Kites)_

AN: Hey, guys… First of all, I want to apologize for the long time I took to update. I'm back to work, had a test last Friday, a presentation last Tuesday and just finished writing a project today… On top of that I am dealing with some personal stuff. I don't plan on making you guys wait too long for an update, but I can't really promise anything. Just know that I'm really enjoying writing this story and getting your feedback is always awesome. Also, I didn't have time to double check this chapter and I'm sorry for the many mistakes it may have. If there is anyone out there who would want to beta this story, I would appreciate it very very much. Aaaaand, sorry for any wrong LA reference. This author note will be a small one, for once. Hope you enjoyed and keep the reviews coming, please? I love them all. I would really like to know your opinion. I'll answer everyone in the reviews section, as always.


	6. Chapter 6: Daisies

**Chapter 6: Daisies**

 _"_ _Would someone tell my heart don't even start_

 _I'm not in the mood_

 _Would someone tell my head give it a rest_

 _There are other things to do…"_

It had been a week since Julie came back to work. Arizona had avoided her ex assistant like the plague. It was as uncomfortable as it could be. They had a brief talk and Arizona went home lamenting the fact that she had probably lost the bond she previous had with the younger woman. She still needed some time to get used to Julie's presence back in her company. She had so much stuff on her mind right now that she couldn't deal with the Julie issue. So, she just let it be and hoped for the best. Maybe in a few weeks things would start being normal and natural for them again.

Walking around her house, she started collecting the things that she and Tim had used to eat dinner from the coffee table in her living room and went to the kitchen. Arizona didn't like having someone working for her and doing things that were her own responsibilities. Once or twice a month she would call someone to clean the whole house and that would be it. Her house was big. Too big for someone who lived completely alone. Thinking about it made her bitterly laugh. It didn't make any sense to have a house this big for one person just to have more stuff to clean up and end up paying someone to do it. Pathetic! She took a deep breath and started washing the dishes. Frustrated sighs living her lips during the whole process.

"Okay, spill it, Zona." Tim's voice startled her. She didn't see him following her to the kitchen. Her bother had come to her house earlier in the evening and offered to cook dinner. It was something he had been wanting to cook for Emmy at a romantic night he had planned for this weekend. He needed her approval on the fish with curry and steamed vegetables. Her belly was surprisingly pleased with the flavors.

"What?" She asked, watching him as he sat in one of the stools in front of the white kitchen island, resting his hands on the cedar wood countertop.

"You're different. The blue sky above your head have turned grey and it's like it is about to start raining at any moment. So, spill it…" His sister had been her perky self in the first days since he was back home. That had somehow faded away. Arizona wasn't someone who easily got stressed or fazed by anything because she always had everything under control. Even when she was a little girl and sat at the dining table in their home, her colored pencils would be lined up in order. She always had a schedule for everything. There was really little stuff which could make Arizona falter.

"It's nothing, really, Tim." She said, looking at the dishes she was washing. "I mean, Julie was shot, one of my campaigns had to start earlier, I just signed what I think is the most important project of my career with a big company. There is a lot happening." Arizona put the last dish away on the counter and turned the kitchen faucet off, drying her hands while turning to look at her brother.

"There is always a lot happening in your life." Tim knew her so well. Even after all of those years away.

"I know." Arizona crossed her arms and rested her body on the island. It was true. There was really a lot happening. More than ever, her life was completely crazy. But it wasn't all. She just wasn't in the mood to talk or to even think about it tonight, after a really stressful day.

"So?" So, she would just lie, play it cool, forget the fool she had made of herself the entire week in her illusion of meeting Callie again and afraid of it happening at the same time.

"Julie is back, the campaign is finished and I just hired 20 new people. I can barely get any sleep. Sometimes I feel like I'm going crazy." Well, she kind of was. She lost her temper with Karev yesterday because he didn't answer her call when she had needed him.

"And that is the reason?" He suspiciously eyed her.

"That's the reason."

"Oh, come on, Zona. I know you…" Tim stood from the stool and came over to where she was, mimicking her position in front of her, his body weight on the cabinets near the oven. He needed to be in front of her, looking directly at her if he wanted any chance of getting her to speak up.

"Too much for my liking. No one can keep secrets from you, can they?"

"Not you, little sis." He was all seriousness.

"Urgh… I… I met this woman a couple of months ago." Speaking about it was even harder than thinking about it. Speaking about it made it real. The fear and the need of whatever it was she was starting to feel for the brunette woman.

"And why the disgusted face?" Tim was trying to gather his sisters' reactions. She was as much as a lady lover as he was. Maybe more. And Arizona was confident in herself. She was confident in her sexuality and in her personality. He knew, though, that his sister had always had a hard time loving. That was her only vulnerability. She just seemed to not know how to give herself to someone. Maybe it was the fact that she had always fought really hard to become the honorable woman she was, raised by strict discipline. That had given her a sense of empowerment over herself. And that could be a hard thing to put aside when you get involved with someone. Because there isn't love without giving yourself to the other person. And Arizona was entirely herself. After the many conversations they had every time one of Arizona's relationships ended, he always wondered if there would ever be someone capable of making her feel different and at the same time give her the space she needed to be herself. Someone who would make her realize that, by giving herself to the one she loved, she wasn't exactly losing who she was, but adding to it.

"I'm disgusted by myself. Not her."

This conversation needed alcohol. Tim walked to the fridge and opened it, looking for any kind of booze his sister could have there. He smiled when he saw the beers. Arizona didn't drink beer. She was a wine kinda girl. Since her early years as a teenager. Those beers were clearly for him. It was sweet to have his sister doing little things for him like that. He took one out and pointed it to her. She just smiled and nodded, indicating that yes, those were for him.

"Can we go right to the point?", he asked after taking a big sip from the bottle he had just opened.

"I met her briefly two months ago. Last monday I saw her again. I decided to run at the park instead of the treadmill because… I don't know. I just felt like it. I was actually making some kind of circuit. And on my way through the park I saw her. Sitting on a bench. And she saw me… She recognized me and stared at me while I was there, paralyzed." Arizona could talk to Tim, right? He was her person, after all.

"Is she pretty?", he mockingly questioned, watching her eyes roll. "You were paralyzed. She has to be pretty." Tim shrugged his shoulders, smirking her way.

"She is." She was. The image of Callie came into her mind instantly, her puffy eyes after crying and the smile on her face while flirting with her. She was truly beautiful. Arizona went to the fridge and got a beer for herself, opening it with her own hands and the help of the fabric of her large shirt. She gulped on it, much to Tim's surprise, who laughed after a moment of shock. Well, fuck it. She was exhausted and frustrated. A beer was an act of rebellion against her confused feelings. It still tasted as bad as any other beer she had ever tried.

"I'm not following you here. I don't get your mixed feelings about this woman. And, I thought me coming back would be enough of a reason for you to act like a unicorn shitting rainbows. I'm disappointed." Tim feigned hurt and Arizona laughed. Boy, she loved this guy.

"I truly am happy that you're back." She offered and Tim came to her side, enveloping her in his free arm, bringing the beer to his mouth. He took one, two sips and squeezed her shoulder encouraging her to speak. "Thinking about her makes me nervous and anxious and all kinds of nauseated. But feeling her presence makes me feel good. Does it make any sense?"

"Yeah. You like her and when you just feel it you are happy about it. When you start really thinking about a relationship with her you get anxious because you are afraid?"

"I'm not going to get into a relationship, Tim." She declared firmly.

"Why are you nervous about her then? You like woman. I know you enjoy them. In every aspect. And if she is into you… It doesn't have to be something more."

If only it was that simple. It had been months since Arizona last had sex with another woman. She made good use of a few toys and her fingers, yes. But actually being with a woman, that happened long ago. And even though Callie had all the attributes necessary to make Arizona get all kinds of worked up, she felt like she needed to know more about her, everything about her first.

"This is different. I don't want to have sex with her."

"You don't?" He sounded so incredulous that Arizona laughed.

"It is not what I first envision when I look at her, Tim. I don't want her to be just one more woman in my life. And I'm just not in the mood for that kind of encounter anymore." She was done with one night stands. She just didn't have it in her anymore.

"You could make her your last one", he bumped her on the hips, drinking his beer in one last gulp and walking away from his sister.

"Tim!", she chastised.

"What?" He has never known his sister as a coward. But that's what she was being right now about this whole situation. Okay, she didn't want one night stands anymore. But she didn't want relationships either. What the hell did she want, then? Platonic love? No one can live off of that forever.

"Urgh…"

"You are afraid. I've seen you get involved with women before, Arizona. And that phrase you just used… You never referred to any woman you were with as someone who you didn't want to… let go. You have to figure out what you want from her before you actually meet her again. Because if you don't want to fuck her but you don't want a relationship either, what is there for you to give to her? Friendship? Because that doesn't sound like what you feel for her either."

"Where the heck did this come from?" She could always count on her brother to give her the hard and ugly truth. Couldn't they begin as friends? But how is a friendship built when she felt more than that for the woman since the beginning. It would never be just friendship, but she didn't think she could be in a relationship right now. And it wouldn't be fair to Callie. Oh, well, she didn't even know if the other woman wanted a relationship with her. How presumptuous of her to think that just because the gorgeous brunette flirted with her a couple of times she wanted to be in a relationship.

"I'm a wise man."

"Yeah, we share genes." She joked, while putting the beer bottle in the trash can she had reserved for glasses, and walked out of the kitchen. Tim was left behind, laughing. Entering the living room, Arizona turned the TV on. A few seconds later she felt Tim sitting beside her on the large grey couch with what she thought was another full bottle of beer. Yeah, he would probably crashing here tonight if he kept going at it like that.

"How is she?", he asked, eyes fixated on the interior design TV show on the screen. He was actually interested in stuff like that recently, because Emmy and he were looking for a nice house for them to live after they got married. His fiancé was more of a classic kind of girl when it was about decorations. Tim would be happy with anything, really, after living years in the desert. But he liked modern things and technology. They had to incorporate both of their preferences in the house. They just needed to figure it out how to do it.

"She's ordinary… In an extraordinary way." Tim turned his head back to look at his sister's face after saying that. Yes, that was definitely a dreamy smile. He laughed because it was funny to finally see Arizona in his shoes. When they were growing up, Arizona was always the unattached kind of girl. And she usually mocked him for being so romantic with the girls he dated. Now look at her. This could be the beginning of something good for the blonde. He knew it. Arizona needed to realize that too. She needed someone. To ground her, to put limits to the crazy schedule she had going on with work, to warm her feet on the cold mornings, to love her, to make her feel life was not only about working, paying bills and breathing.

"What?" The annoyed expression on Arizona's face wasn't able to cover the amusement of the moment.

"You're stupid."

"You're in love."

"It's been one week, Tim."

"It's been two months."

"It's been one week."

"Okay. You have a crush."

Oh my God! And here she was, thinking she was happy her brother was back. Not so much right now. "A crush, really? How old am I?"

"Apparently, 16." He didn't have time to react as he felt a pillow hitting him hard on his face, making him laugh. Arizona was just so easy sometimes. He had missed this in his time overseas. The way they used to tease each other. Suddenly, he wasn't 36 years old, but back to his twenties.

"You're impossible", Arizona stated, smiling. She couldn't be angry at her brother.

"Come on. I need the rest of the story", Tim demanded after a few moments of silence, her eyes pretending to watch the TV show.

Arizona sighed before telling him what had happened during the week. "I sat with her that day and we talked for about half an hour. About everything and anything. She was called at work. After that, I've went running there every day in hopes she would be there again. But at the same time, while I'm making my way there, I keep wishing she won't be. So, yeah, I'm disgusted by myself." It was hard to admit to herself she had done such a silly thing. Admitting it out loud to her brother was even harder. She made a fool of herself the whole week. Because if she truly wanted to meet Callie, she knew pretty well how to do that.

"Why would you go there to see her and wish she is not there? What?" Tim's confusion was the same as her own. She didn't know why either.

"I don't think I can deal with a relationship right now, Tim. And even though she suggested that I should contact her to continue our conversation, I…"

"Wait… Wait there", he interrupted, putting his bottle aside on the coffee table and taking the remote control to turn the TV off. He turned his body to look directly at her. "She asked you to call her?"

"Not exactly. She asked if I knew how to contact her in case I wanted to continue the talk." The absurd of it all was starting to hit her. Maybe talking about this was what she really needed. Avoiding it wouldn't make her any good.

"And you know how to?"

"She was Julie's doctor, Tim. I know where she works at. Teddy works with her. And getting her phone number wouldn't be hard, I think."

"You are an idiot, you know that, right?" Yes, she knew. Oh, wow! "Why didn't you call her?"

"I… don't know." Because she wasn't as mature as she thought she was? Because she was afraid. Because she was a coward. Because all of her previous relationships turned out to be meaningless and she didn't want this one to be. Because she was really an idiot. It didn't make any sense. Not even to her. Arizona rested her head on the couch and sighed looking at the tall cathedral wood celling.

"You should just go with the flow, Zona. She implied she wanted you to call her. So you call her. If she invites you to go on a date, you accept. If she kisses you, you kiss her back. And if you feel something while doing all of that, you will know you are doing the right thing."

"Like you did with Emmy." Arizona remembered when they were traveling and Tim met Emily. She had asked him what he thought he was doing when he gave up the rest of the travel to stay in San Diego with Emmy. And he had said "I'm going with the flow". He was just being. Free. What he didn't get to be while deployed.

"Exactly. Which brings us back to the reason why I am here, in the first place. Bachelorette party." He thought like he had said enough to Arizona about her 'situation' with the woman. He would let her think about it later, when she was in bed, maybe. Arizona was never one to like being pushed too hard on her personal matters. She liked her space and he was not about to cross the line. He just hoped she did the right thing. "You know, I don't think I want to spend the night out with the guys while my fiancé is out there with a bunch of crazy ladies pushing her over a half-naked man."

Arizona laughed. It was so much like Tim to be concerned about that. He wasn't worried about his fiancé liking the show or about her doing anything too forward with the man. He was actually worried about the man taking advantage of her or being disrespectful. He knew how those places could be. And Emily would drink. Her friends would drink. That could end up bad.

"What? Doesn't that image disturbs you even a little bit?"

"It actually terrifies me, yes." God, she didn't even want to start thinking about it, no.

"My point exactly", he said after seeing the disgusted expression on her pale face. "Guys are disgusting. I don't want their hands all over my girl's body."

"But wouldn't it only be fair when you would be doing exactly the same?"

"I'm not going to a stripers place."

"No?" A bachelorette party without stripers? That wasn't something that happened often. She didn't know what Tim's friends had prepared for him, but she wasn't sure if they would agree with that.

"Who do you think I am, AZ?"

"A horny man? Like all the men in the planet?"

"Well, yes to that", Tim smirked. "But have you seen my girl? I got lucky. There is no other woman I want a lap dance from."

"TIM!" A 36 years old man without filter. Her brother would never grow up.

"What? Wouldn't you want a lap dance from your hot Doc?" He mocked, with a mischievous grin.

"Oh my God, what have I done wrong to have to put up with you?" She had let the mental innocent images she had from Callie slip out of her mind to be replaced by a very sexy latina walking her way in a red lingerie. This was wrong. Tim was mean. And now she was extremely embarrassed by her own thoughts.

"You love me."

"Not so much right now. I have a terrible, terrible image of Emmy rubbing herself on your man parts and it doesn't look appealing at all. Gross."

Tim laughed.

* * *

"You reading things about her again, Torres?" Mark joked when he entered the doctor's room to see Callie lying on the couch with a book in her hands.

"Yes, because I'm that pathetic. But technically I'm not reading 'about' her. It's one of her books." For the whole week Callie had expected a call from a certain blonde. Which didn't come. As much as she wanted to get to know Arizona better, she didn't want to force things. Maybe it wasn't supposed to be. "She hasn't called. And it's been more than a week." Callie closed the book and put it aside, sitting on the couch and putting the snickers on her sock's covered feet.

It had been one hell of a night and she had surgery in two hours. She should have spent the last hours sleeping, but instead, she chose to read the book from a woman who apparently didn't give her a single thought the whole week. That day, after coming back to the hospital, she had discovered that a patient on which she had performed a hip replacement had complications and she had to operate on him again. She went home mid afternoon and as soon as she laid in bed and her body was able to relax, the blonde was the first thing she thought about. And she was the first thing she thought about the next day, when she woke up. Not able to contain herself, she went online and ordered one of her books. It was silly, but she was a curious woman and she needed to somehow know how Arizona's mind worked. So, three days later, when the book was delivered, she brought it to work with her to read when she got a few minutes between surgeries. The prospect of a relationship of any kind with the intelligent blonde woman was put aside. Callie was simply enjoying to get to know what for her was a character. And if nothing ever happened between them, to have read this book would still be a good thing, because it was remarkable. That woman had a really brilliant mind.

"Why don't you call her? You can very easily have her phone number." Mark inquired when he sat beside her and took the book, going through some random pages.

"Because she invited me for coffee. She should be the one to call."

"You being a chicken", he said, his eyes were still fixated on the book. Mark had stopped on a page and was reading it. Apparently very interested. Yeah, Mark should really read a book like this. All men needed to read it, actually. It was about how the word respect was never put into action when it came to women. It showed the evolution of the concept men and society had about women and their place in the world. And how women values were determined primarily by differences in physical strength between men and women.

"I'm not about to make the same mistakes, Mark. I won't just throw myself out there again like that." She ironically laughed at her statement. She didn't want to throw herself out there but here she was, desperately reading the other woman's book.

"Calling her is not throwing yourself out there. It would be more like giving the two of you a chance. You can expect a call and hope for an invitation. What you can't do is to put your expectations so high that you will almost get married in Vegas or move in with someone you've been with for barely a month. THAT is throwing yourself out there." Mark's words where like a punch in her stomach because they were true. She never really made the right decision when it came to love.

"This is frustrating. I've seen her three times. I shouldn't be feeling like this. I barely know her." How to avoid it, though? She just… liked the blonde.

"That's why you're like this. The little you know about her pleases you and that makes you want to know more. That's perfectly normal when you're interested in someone. Besides, Arizona is very good on the eyes."

"You're weird today", Callie declared, looking at him suspiciously.

"Why?", he frowned.

"Because you're terrible at this and you just said a bunch of things that make sense and it's scaring me."

"Ha ha…"Mark sarcastically fake laughed, standing up from the couch and walking to the mini fridge they had in the room, to look for something to snack on. "Do something." He found an apple which certainly belonged to someone. They wouldn't find it here when they looked for it. Too late, though, he had thought while taking a bite. "And stop reading things about her when you could just call and accept the coffee invitation and get to know her better face to face."

There was only a grunt from Callie in response.

"Aria has sent me a picture of Alana yesterday", Callie said after a few moments of silence. Mark looked at her from where he was quietly eating his apple sat on a chair near the couch she was sitting. "After I spent days and days begging her for one. She barely talks to me, Mark. I don't know what I did so wrong."

After her cartilage project worked two months ago, Callie innocently thought things would start to get better in her life. In all the aspects. Silly illusion. Her cartilage was still progressing. But everything else… She had attempted calling her father more than once. She had e-mailed him. She had sent a freaking letter. Her mother was just as silent. Aria was the only one who had answered her. Barely, though…

"She will come around. And so will the rest of your family." Mark threw the remnants of his apple on the trash can and sat beside Callie again, holding her right hand in a comfortable caress. "You are awesome, Torres. If at the end they can't see that, it's their loss."

"Thank you." There were tears in her eyes when she looked at Mark's blue ones. He gave her a smile and brought his big hands to wipe them away, giving her a kiss on the forehead.

"Let me see the munchkin", he inquired.

"Oh, my God, Mark. She is so cute." Callie looked for her phone which she had dropped off somewhere on the couch. Finding it in the right corner, she went through the pics on her gallery, finding the single pic she had of her beautiful niece. "I wish I could hold her. I sent a box of things for her to Aria's house two weeks ago. She didn't have it sent back, so… it must be a good sign." She handed Mark her phone.

Mark's face lit up. The little girl looked so much like Callie she could easily be mistaken by her own. She had the same nose, the same big eyes. "Yeah, that's a pretty cute kid. I would like having one of those."

"What?" Mark was just so weird these days. So weird. He and Lexie had kind of started to be a thing last month. She could see the difference in his actions. Maybe her friend wasn't that bad?

"What? I like kids. I love kids."

"Mmhmm! God forbid it." She said, taking the phone out of his hands and smiling at the chubby little face of Alana.

* * *

After surgery, Callie went to the nurses' station to gather her charts. This was the last of her work for today and she would go home earlier. Her apartment was a complete mess and it needed cleaning. Oh, the 'perks' of living with a roommate. Sometimes heaven, sometimes hell. More often hell than heaven when your roommate is Cristina Yang.

While in surgery she thought about everything in her life. It was always the moment she could think more clearly. Not after a good cry, not after a good night's sleep, not before falling asleep. But in surgery. One may think a surgery should demand all of a surgeon's attention. It was true, but for Callie, it was when she would have a better perspective of life. It was when she felt more like herself. It was in a surgery when she found who she was, the meaning of her life and the meaning of her existence. It made her feel like she could do anything in the world.

She was important. What she did for a living was important. Her family should be proud of her. She was a young successful woman. And she would try for the rest of her life to have her family back, if it was needed. But this afternoon she decided she wouldn't make her happiness depend on that. As hard as it sounded and as she knew it would be, there were only two outcomes she would accept. There would come a day in which she would wake up and be happy because her family accepted her or there would come a day when she would wake up and be completely fine with her family not accepting her. Because there was life out there to live.

So, she would text Arizona. She would buy her other books. She would clean her apartment. She would buy an airplane ticket to go and see her niece. And tonight she would go out to dance. Alone…

"Dr. Kepner! Come here", Callie yelled when she saw April passing by.

"Yes, Dr. Torres." If Callie didn't need the intern right now, she would be annoyed at the sunshiny grin on April's face.

"I need a favor."

"You want me to bring you coffee?" The redhead was her favorite person to ask for coffee, because somehow she was the only one intelligent enough to order it right like she wanted.

"That too. But I need another thing. You know Dr. Altman?"

"Yes. What about her?"

"I need you to get a phone number from her phone. From Arizona Robbins." April's expressions softened when she was finally presented to her task. It was simple, she could do that.

"Okay. I will just go ask her and bring your…"

"No, no, no. She can't know you're getting it." April's face dropped, angst taking place.

"How am I supposed to do that?"

"No idea. That's why I'm asking someone to do it." Callie laughed, bringing her attention back to the charts.

"And why would I do that?" Why couldn't interns just do as they were told?

"Because I can easily put you under my supervision for the next month and I know how much you hate ortho." If the threat didn't work, Callie's serious demeanor would.

"I… like ortho." Or not. Well, of course April liked ortho. She was crazy about trauma. People in trauma tended to like orthopeadics too. It worked both ways, though, right? If April liked ortho, it could be an offer instead of a threat.

"I want it by 5pm. And my coffee is for right now. You can go", she dismissed the redhead. Hoping her authoritative voice would work better than the empty threat. She didn't wait for an answer, she went back to reading the charts, feeling April's presence disappear after a few seconds of silence.

"That was mean, Torres." The voice startled her. Not because it abruptly interrupted her thoughts, but because of who it belonged to.

"Teddy!" Her cheeks were burning. She was caught. What was she doing on the ortho floor anyways?

"So, you want Arizona's number, huh?" Callie was sure Teddy's mouth would be ripped in the middle if she smiled any wider. Teddy was clearly more okay with her interest in Arizona than she was.

"She invited me for coffee. I've been waiting for her to call me for a week. I just… Urgh."

"I get you. Arizona is frustrating sometimes. But she is a really nice person to have in your life, too." Teddy didn't demand explanations. She didn't push. She didn't further embarrass Callie. And the brunette was glad about that. She watched as the blond took her cellphone out of her pocket and typed for a little bit, immediately feeling her pocket vibrate. "Done. I've sent it to you. Just call her. Or message her. Something you need to know about Arizona is that sometimes she needs a little push."

"Okay..." Callie thankfully smiled.

"And tell that poor intern that you have the phone number already." The blonde laughed, starting to walk out.

"Where is the fun in doing that? Would you please make it a little harder for her?", she yelled, watching the cardio surgeon leave, her laugh resonating in the hall.

* * *

When she put the charts all back on the nurses' station later that afternoon, Callie took a deep breath and smiled at Ana, her favorite nurse, who readily took them to put it all in order.

"Ana, you will stay for the night shift, right?" Ana nodded. "Would you please keep an eye on Mr. Andrews, the one from the surgery of this afternoon? We had a small complication during surgery and I trust you more than any intern or resident, for the matter, in this place. He should be just fine. But if his stats change you contact me, okay?"

"Okay, Dr Torres. Have a good night. I hope I don't need to call you." The nurse slightly laughed. And Callie understood what she meant. She just wanted her night shift to be a light one, because as Callie, she had been at the hospital for more than 24 hours already.

Turning away from the nurses' station she took her phone out of her pocket and looked at the text Teddy had sent her earlier. Arizona's contact was under the nickname "Flagstaff". It was funny. She saved the number on her own phone, but changed the nickname to "Dimples". She was being extremely cheesy and absurdly silly, but Arizona's dimples, together with her eyes, were what Callie found more beautiful in the blonde. She hit the button 'new message' and typed *I'm still waiting for that call? I didn't picture you as a coward, Miss Robbins*. She read it once, then twice, and pondered if it was too aggressive. She added a thoughtful emoticon to the end, to lighten the sentence, read one more time and hit 'send'.

She put her phone back on her pocket and walked out of the floor, pressing the button on the elevator.

"Dr. Torres, thank God. I thought I had missed you here, because, you know, it's 5:23 pm and you asked it for 5pm. But I got it. It was a hard task, I have to tell you. Because I looked for Arizona Robbins on Dr. Altman's phone and there simply wasn't anyone with that name. But there were only two numbers on her contact list with nicknames and one of them was 'Hot stuff' and I didn't think Dr. Altman had a woman's phone number under that nickname on her contact list. I mean, she could… She totally could, right? But then the other nickname was Flagstaff and that is a city in Arizona, isn't it? Well, I hope it's the right number. Here… " Callie was wide eyed at April's out of breath desperate rant when the elevator's doors opened. Her hand was extended in her direction holding a small piece of pink paper. She took the paper from the redhead fingers and laughed. Teddy actually HAD made it harder for the intern to get the phone number, it seemed.

"Thank you, April. I appreciate your effort. I hope you are right about the number. Otherwise I'll be sending someone confidential contents no one else should have access." The elevators doors had already closed behind April, but luckily the other elevator had just arrived at the floor. She started leaving and when she was about to enter the elevator, Aprils high pitched voice sounded on her ears.

"Dr. Torres, wait."

Callie took a deep breath to avoid the thoughts of hurting the other woman and turned in her direction. "What?"

"This came for you. I was about to come and give you the phone number when I saw this guy talking with the receptionist on the first floor. As I was coming here anyway, I said I could bring it to you. He almost didn't give it to me. Said he had orders to give it directly to you or someone at your department, but since security wouldn't let him get in, he had no other choice. You know, after that crazy man was here with a gun, it's not easy to get past those guys." My god, where was the turn off button for this woman's mouth?

Callie took the small white box from her hands and started untying the red ribbon. "Who was the guy who brought this?"

"I don't know. It was brought by a delivery guy. He had a uniform which said 'VOX'." April shrugged, Callie's phone vibrating in her pocket.

"What?"

"That's all I know."

Holding the half open box in one hand, she reached for her phone. *Who is this?* Dimples had just asked. Oh my God. Already chastising herself for the text she had sent to the beautiful blonde, she opened the box to confirm her suspicion. There were several small daisies without stem laid on the bottom of the box. A yellow hard paper was on the top, handwritten letters in black said:

"Will you say yes if I ask you for coffee again?

A. Robbins.

Ps.: Let me know on this number…"

And then a phone number was attached.

"It seems I didn't have to go through all that trouble after all", declared a pouting April.

Callie wanted someone to punch her in the face. But she smiled instead, even knowing she had made a complete fool of herself. Because Arizona wasn't a coward. Loves me, loves me not?

 _"_ _Would someone hear me out, I've got to shout_

 _I cannot hold this in_

 _I've tried to stuff it down and watch it drown_

 _But I cannot pretend…"_

 _(Start Over – Roger Jaeger)_

* * *

AN: Hi, guys. I won't apologize for the long time I took to update this chapter because this will probably be the frequency I'll be updating till the end. I really can't update more often because work takes A LOT of my time and besides working 60hours a week I still have stuff to do at home. I'm really sorry. But maybe the fact that the chapters are longer than normal will make it up to you? I was expecting to hear more of what you think in the last chapter, but I guess it was my fault. Because of how much I made you guys wait for it. Also, I have someone helping me now with the grammar and stuff. Thank you sooooo much "Saraforever" for your help. I've read last chapter again and oh, my god. So many mistakes. I hope this one is a little better in what concerns that. And please, please let me know what you think? I miss some of you guys reviews. As always, I'll answer each of you in the review section.


	7. Chapter 7: Hidden swing

**Chapter 7: Hidden Swing**

 _"_ _And there's something about these streets_

 _And the way you wear your heart on your sleeve_

 _And down below I see the aquamarine_

 _I think that I'm beginning to care…"_

She was finally here. Looking at the Coffee Shop name framed on the front of the building, she sighed and pushed the glass door open. A ding indicated the entry of a new costumer. The place was warm and cozy. It had an old vibe, much different to the modern patterns usually found in LA. Most tables were occupied and there were a few people in the line to get their coffees. But the place was not crowded. Something instrumental was playing on the background. It was kinda weird, but kinda good. It fit the place perfectly.

She looked around, her eyes searching the object of her thoughts for the last couple weeks. A sense of anxiousness invaded her at the same time her brown orbs found the shinning hair of a blonde head. Arizona was sitting on a booth by one of the large windows, her computer open right in front of her bright blue eyes. She could see her little fingers working fast on the keyboard, followed by small pauses to read something. All the while, her brows were furrowed in concentration. Callie liked how Arizona seemed to be just another normal person living as a normal citizen when not at work, dressed like most. Even if the plain white shirt, dark skinny jeans and ankle boots would never look as good in anyone as it did on her right now.

Arizona didn't have anything else on the table. No coffee. Did that mean she just got here? Or that she was being considerate enough to wait for her to make an order? Looking at her watch, Callie saw she wasn't that late. It was only 7 minutes past the time they were supposed to meet. After taking just a few more seconds to admire the blonde from a distance, she made a choice and silently walked to the line of people, ordering two coffees and hopping Arizona's eyes didn't divert from her computer screen to find her. Not yet.

Coffees in hand she walked to the table where the blonde was sitting and stood there, just looking, waiting to be noticed. As the thing Arizona was working on was apparently very important, she decided to act and placed the coffee on the table right beside where the blonde's arm rested while she read something.

When she straightened herself up, blue eyes snapped in her direction, surprise evident in Arizona's features. Callie gave her a small smile in greeting, immediately reciprocated by a dimpled one. She watched Arizona close her notebook without taking her eyes from her.

"I'm so sorry I didn't see you coming in."

"It's okay. You looked cute all concentrated over there." Oh, Torres… Way to start. Their eyes locked for a couple of seconds. Callie didn't really know what to expect to happen from now on. This was not exactly a date. Arizona had never invited her on a date. She had always referred to it as going for a coffee, as casual as two friends would call it. But then, the first gesture was a box filled with daisies and a hand written little card. It wasn't all the way romantic but it definitely had a hint of more than friendship imprinted on it. Or was it only on her mind?

She watched Arizona break their eye contact and take the offered coffee from the table, taking a sip and closing her eyes. Her face was one of pure pleasure. If not the disturbing vision of her pink tongue slightly sticking out to lick her lips, the small appreciative moan the blonde gave made Callie fully aware of the fact that she had indeed made a good choice. She had no idea how Arizona liked drinking her coffee, but maybe Callie had just made Arizona find another favorite.

"This is good!" She smiled, her eyes open now, looking back at Callie. "There is coconut in it, am I right?"

"Coconut milk. It became my coffee addiction last spring and… It's almost spring again." Callie declared. It was a Hawaiian coffee a friend had presented to her. She had drunk it every morning for two whole months till summer came and it was just too hot to drink hot coffee every day in sunny LA.

"Thank you. I really like it." All the while, Callie was still standing close to the table, waiting for an invitation to sit and start whatever this hanging out session was. "Oh, my god, I'm sorry again. Please, sit." Arizona finally said. Clearly, the blonde's mind wasn't completely there. That thought left Callie insecure. She sat on the booth at the other side of the table, drinking her own coffee and watching Arizona sit herself more relaxed in front of her. "For someone as traditional as I am, you may have found my new favorite coffee."

You see, Arizona had this confuse vibe around her since the very beginning. She would give some and take some back. It was so hard to read her. "I'm happy the memory of me will probably be attached to your possible new favorite coffee." Arizona just giggled, taking another sip of the hot liquid. "What is traditional Arizona favorite coffee?"

"Plain boringly amazing cappuccino?"

"Yeah, well I'm anything but traditional!" The brunette declared, remembering her exotic taste for a lot of things.

"Really?" Arizona questioned curiously, deciding to take this kind of conversation further. "Favorite ice cream?"

"Oh, passion fruit and melon." She answered without hesitation and saw Arizona's nose scrunch up in distaste. She made a mental note to, someday, make the blonde taste it. She would be blown away by the freshness of her favorite ice creams, for sure.

"Favorite pizza?" As Callie was taking a few seconds to think about that one, the other woman incited her answer. "Don't disappoint me on that one." She got a giggle in response.

"It is probably a turkey ham, ricotta and spinach I tasted a few months back…" Arizona's brows were curved now. And Callie could only laugh. Her smile died, though, when Arizona threw the next question at her.

"Women?" Arizona had avoided questioning Teddy about anything related to Callie because she wanted to discover everything by herself. But the information that Callie's ex-lover was a blonde, blue eyed woman was given to her in a very casual way in one of her talks with her best friends, when Arizona told her she had invited Callie for coffee. Again.

"Uh, yeah… You got me on that one." She was suddenly very shy, probably blushing, and tried to hide herself behind her cup of coffee, taking another sip. When she looked at Arizona again, there was a smirk on her lips. Inquisitive eyes didn't let her scape answering. This woman… "Blondes, I think. I've discovered what my obsession with Sharlize Theron when I was younger meant." Callie nervously smiled.

"Chocolate, pepperoni and brunettes." Arizona declared, giving the answers to her own questions in an attempt to make Callie less uncomfortable. It was never her intention, but she could see the brunette was struggling. Callie looked at her intensely as if absorbing the curiosities about the blonde and digesting the fact that Arizona liked brunettes and she was a brunette. "Our conversations seem to be always some kind of interrogatory." Arizona half joked.

"I like it. As much as it may be a little childish for a conversation between a surgeon and a writer." If you think about it, you would imagine that they might have been discussing about how science was objective and writing was all about abstract things and feelings. Or about how people working with science tended to be very literal while writers use to be dreamy people. Except that things were the complete opposite here.

"We have more to offer than what we do for a living." There was playful tone to Arizona's declaration. It made Callie comfortable enough to joke.

"You're completely right. That's why we are sitting here exchanging cards about pizza and ice creams." She was rewarded with the melodic sound of Arizona's belly laugh. Callie was sure that if her companion had any coffee in her mouth at the time, she would have spilled it all.

Callie smiled all along, watching how the dimples danced on the fair cheeks. They remained silent a little bit after Arizona's laugh subsided, just enjoying their coffees and giving casual looks at the outside of the coffee shop through the big window. Arizona seemed to really enjoy her coffee, as it was possible to see the small sips she gave one followed right away by another, as if just enjoying the subtle taste.

"So, big project?" Callie questioned after some time. Arizona averted her eyes from the streets and looked at the brunette at time to see her indicating the computer with her face.

"Yeah, it's been crazy. It's my new book. I'm already late on the dead line." She was so so so late on the dead line. It all felt overwhelming with everything happening at her company right now. She just didn't know what to do with her time anymore because there were a hundred things to do and only 24 hours in a day.

"When is it supposed to come out?"

"The book should be out in may. I'm not so sure it will happen that soon, though. I'm only half way through it… How's the cartilage going?"

"I'm working on making a patent of it and writing an article. We will start testing it in small animals, then bigger animals. Later we test it in people, like a trial, an experimental phase. And only then we can start really using it freely in medicine. That is… If I don't find major problems, which could make it unsafe for human use. It is a years' worth work." Arizona intently listened to Callie's plans, weirdly interested on the subject.

"Sounds challenging…" It was. But there was no stopping Callie when she wanted something.

"That's what most of us are moved by, isn't it? Look at you, for example. It's a hard field for women to be that active and involved. And you do it every day in your company…"

"You think there are professions exclusively masculine?" Arizona's question was inquisitive and Callie felt like her answer to it was very important to the blonde somehow. Her brows were defensively furrowed.

"That's not exactly what I meant. I'm in ortho and that would be considered a really hard field for women to work too. Harder for women not because we are weaker, but because people still think we are. And we both know it isn't true." When she saw Arizona's head shaking up and down in agreement, she knew they were on the same page.

"You're right. It still sounds humiliating to men to be under a woman's command. I never understood what that all was about. They are subordinated due to their job role, not because of their gender. They would still be subordinated if their boss was another man."

"Don't tell me, I've had my fair share of problems with male interns."

As the subject was partially ended, they both finished their coffees. Arizona was commanding their orders now. She looked Callie's way and smiled.

"Would you like to eat anything with a new coffee? I invited you and you've already paid for my coffee. That is not right…" The blonde declared shaking her head.

"Why is that?"

"Because I am supposed to be a polite and gentle person."

"You sent me little daisies to invite me for coffee. Not many things are more gentle and subtle than that. I loved it, by the way. I think I haven't thanked you properly." After receiving the flowers and the card, Callie had timidly apologized for her previous text and thanked her for the flowers and invitation. They exchanged a few texts to fix a date for the coffee to happen, not talking much further than that, since they agreed to meet just two days after. She was grateful Arizona seemed to just ignore Callie's first text completely.

"You're welcome. They are one of my favorite flowers, along pink cosmos and white evergreen candytuff flowers."

For some reason, Callie found it very fitting. Arizona was this petit, fairy skinned, delicate woman with a sweet voice. Even if her personality was clearly very strong, her looks gave her away in some level. She had a really hard shell, but with the flowers, she could see that what would leak out of her once her shell was cracked open could only be very sweet. And so, she smiled, because she was truly amazed by how the blonde could manage to put on a mask so well. Something Callie herself was never very good at.

The rest of the afternoon was spent with then talking over another coffee, bagels and chocolate and sprinkles covered doughnuts. There was no hurry from Arizona's part in going home. There were no pagers going off, no one around to interrupt and no desire for the moment to end. There were only small smiles and the late afternoon sunlight shining on the blondes' beautiful face, her eyes acquiring an almost white color, so bright was the blue on her irises, and her golden locks shinning livelier.

* * *

"This is beautiful." Callie looked out to the city in front of them. They were standing in a higher level of Elysian Park. It was late afternoon and the spring sun was starting to set. She was glad Arizona had invited her here after their coffee, asking if she had anything important to do. Things were... lighter between them today. She felt like there was not a weight or pressure on the things they did nor on the things they said. They just found their place around each other. It was more comfortable, more natural, more simple.

"It is, right? I think it is an organic, raw kind of beauty." Arizona had played with the idea of bringing Callie here the whole time they were at the coffee shop. This was not entirely planed. It was supposed to just be a coffee between… two people getting to know each other. But at the point their second coffee was fully consumed, she found herself wishing they both could just be able to drink one more as a way of not finishing their afternoon just yet, even if she had a lot of work waiting for her to be done. So, she made her decision.

"I used to love swings when I was a kid." The brunette had two swings at home, growing up in Miami. She remembered, though, to annoy the crap out of her Nanny to take her to the park. The swing there was so much fun. It overlook a big area and there kids running around. She didn't really see much of a point on swinging for hours looking at a fence or the pool. Besides, her sister was never one to like playing the same things as her, resulting in her always playing alone. She loved the swing at home, of course. But it was nothing like the red swing in that Miami park.

"Not anymore?"

"I haven't had the chance to swing in a really long time." The excitement was evident in Callie's voice. By that, Arizona knew she had made the right thing.

"Well, suit yourself", the blonde smiled and pointed the swing to Callie with a hand, shrugging her shoulders.

"Aren't we too old for that?", Callie amusingly asked while sitting on the swing and looking over to the city. The lights starting to appear as the night was coming.

"What are you talking about? I'm 16…" Arizona heard Callie laugh from her spot. Her eyes were still on the city below them and her feet picking at the ground, dirtying her brown boots.

"Does it mean I'm 14?" Arizona rolled her eyes. Somehow, she noticed Callie knew exactly what she did because she laughed again and gave a small push to start swinging.

"Yes… Just pretend. Do you want me to push you?"

"Yeah", she answered biting her lips.

"I found this place when I came walking around here last week." Arizona declared. She had admitted to Callie she had been walking around here every day last week. She didn't say the reason, though, and left it for Callie to pick up in the air. "It's funny how when you live in the city, you do not enjoy all it has to offer like the tourists who come here do. They may know and experience it better than us."

"That's a true thing. I've never been here, even after 10 years living in LA…" She had walked around Elysian park a few times, yes. But she never came up here. "Can you push a little harder?" Instantly, she felt the wind blowing stronger on her face and the feeling of fluttering on her stomach growing bigger. "More?", she almost screamed. Arizona gave her a big push and she laughed at the feeling.

After a few moments of flying high and a wondering mind, the swing slowly came to a stop. There were some moments in life in which you just really stop and feel. For that moment alone, it was worthy to have lived that day. This… this was one of those moments. Because there was something about defying gravity, something about feeling the wind, something about your hair flying freely. Something about feeling Arizona's presence there and the way she smiled tonight. Something about the warm sunset and the city lights. She just liked being 14 for a few minutes.

She opened her eyes and looked around for Arizona. She was rested against the tree holding the swing, grinning. "That was really good." The blonde just smiled bigger at her, her arms folded. "You should try."

"I'm okay", Arizona said. This was not for herself. It was for Callie. She had swung a few times during the week. It was never like this, of course, because there were no lights below. And there was no Callie pushing her.

"No, really. You have to swing on the swing." Callie stood from where she was seated and walked to where Arizona was standing. She pointed to the swing and waited for Arizona to move. She didn't. She looked at her for a bit and saw Arizona wear a serious expression. "Really! You want to feel that." It was almost a demanding tone the one she used, and for a millisecond she thought she had went too far on testing Arizona's limits with her. But it worked.

"Okay." Arizona immediately walked around Callie and to the swing. She sat and looked at Callie, her lips slightly curved up, waiting. Her expression was an invitation for Callie to push her too.

This woman was something else, Callie thought as she walked to the swing. Arizona was looking ahead, waiting for the first push. Callie stood behind her, sighed and without giving it a second thought brought her hands to each side of the swing, over Arizona's own hands. She felt the fair skinned hand move as if in a startle, but she didn't take her own hand off. She held tighter and giving it a squeeze she started pulling Arizona back and a little more to the back. And then, she released the swing and the warmth of the blonde's skin, hearing Arizona's 'OH' of surprise. She pushed her each time a little harder.

"Callie, that's too high." This was actually thrilling, but she couldn't deny she was a bit scared. This was the higher she had ever gone in a swing. And Arizona hated heights. It's was not like she was afraid of heights, she just was afraid of… falling?

"Just close your eyes and hold tight." Callie screamed.

"Calliope…" She screamed back, without even noticing the use of the brunette's full name.

"Do what I said." Arizona heard Callie's voice said from a distance when she was high.

"I'm serious."

"I am too. You want to feel it. Close your eyes… And hold tight."

And so Arizona did. "Oh, my God."

Her insides were turning. She was nervous, but this was good, she concluded and her hair started flying all around hitting her face. She giggled with closed eyes as her hands tightened their grip on the swing. It wasn't long before she felt the swing slow down. She wasn't going as high anymore. She opened her eyes and was graced with the image of the lightening city again. It seemed this wasn't only for Callie at the end.

"Wow." Arizona said when her feet finally felt the ground again.

"Told you." Callie's voice came from behind her. She came around and smiled big at Arizona.

"As an orthopedic surgeon, I never thought you would encourage activities like that", Arizona joked.

"As an orthopedic surgeon, I would know exactly what to do if you had fallen."

"That's mean."

Callie laughed. Arizona was a really simple person for the place she held in her professional life. She really liked it about the blonde. But she was just too uptight sometimes. She knew by that small moment, that Arizona didn't usually took time to just be silly. She took her life too seriously. "That's the truth. But I knew you would not fall."

"How come?" Arizona asked, bringing her hands together to massage one another after holding so tight to the swing.

"You came here the whole week, I'm sure you've practiced."

"Nope. I've never been that high. Not even when I used to jump off of it with my brother to see who would fall further away." She laughed, remembering the moment.

"That kind of courageous girl, huh?", Callie mocked.

"The kind that ties a sheet around the neck and jumps from the ceiling." The brunette looked at her almost questioningly. By that sentence, she knew Arizona had come a long way in terms of personality and dealing with life. She couldn't imagine a kid who wanted to fly once being afraid of heights. It was like she had her wings trimmed each time a little more till it was completely gone. She knew how to speed through her career like no other, she heard. But what about her personal life?

"Any broken bones from that?"

"No. Timothy put a mattress on the floor."

"The brother?"

"Yeah. My brother."

Arizona talked about him so dearly. The tone in her voice even changed talking about him. He must be a good person. "He seems nice."

"The nicest guy to walk on earth…" It was true. And she was really grateful for having him in her life. And then she remembered… "How is your sister and your little niece?"

It surprised Callie a bit, the fact that Arizona remembered them, from their talk at Joe's. Well, Callie was the one drunk, after all.

"I got to have her send me a picture of the baby. She's the cutest thing ever. Wanna see her?" She didn't wait for Arizona's answer, her phone was already on her hands looking for the pic on her camera roll.

"Absolutely."

"Here. Her name is Alana", Callie proudly stated and Arizona smiled, taking the phone on her hands to look at the little girl. She must be around a month old in this pic. She had a pink binky in her mouth, almost falling as the baby was asleep. It was adorable! She had too much hair for such a small tinny human, but it was so cute. It was a really dark shade, just like her auntie's, and seemed so so soft.

"Now that's what I would call the most beautiful baby ever. Her cheeks…" Oh, yeah, there were the cheeks.

"I know, right? I wish I could see her." The dreamy smile on Callie's face gave place to an almost sad expression.

"You… have problems with your family?" She asked in an impulse. Maybe it was too soon to enter that serious field of the brunette's life. But… She felt like she needed to understand Callie. She needed to know her.

"Ever since I came out." Callie answered a few seconds later. "Around 8 months ago. They stopped talking to me."

"I'm really sorry about it." She was. Because even if it was hard for Arizona to deal with her own sexuality, she knew she had the best outcome. She had all the support one could ever have from her family. She was one of the lucky ones.

"It's alright. I've been thinking about it all in the last days and I came to the conclusion that I will always try to make them understand and accept me. But apart from that, I'll just keep living my life and trying to enjoy what it has to offer. "

"That is a good course of action. You deserve to be happy." Arizona truly believed it. Everyone deserved to be happy. And Callie was not an exception. She looked once more to the little girl's pic and gave Callie her phone back. "Do you want to go?" Was the mood killed by Arizona's inappropriate question?

"Can I swing one more time?" Maybe not, she happily concluded by Callie's hopeful question.

"Absolutely." Arizona stood from the swing and gave Callie the go ahead to sit. When she did, the blonde imitated Callie's actions and hold her hands on the swing, pushing her back. "Close your eyes and hold tight." She said before releasing the brunette to the wind to blow on her beautiful face again. She heard Callie's laugh resonate in the air.

* * *

"Sooooo…" It was the next day and Arizona was running late in basically everything. It made her type A personality give somersaults inside her head. She was basically running through VOX corridor's giving orders and demanding answers. Tonight she had the final meeting with the CEO of "Montreal", THE biggest car industry in the country. This job was a challenge every day. People knew she was good, but they kept putting her in a difficult position in which she had to prove herself. Oh, a woman can't understand about cars, let's just make her work with it and see how it goes. In fact, yes, Arizona didn't understand shit about cars. She just drives them and when they are broken she sends them to somewhere to fix and takes a cab. However, she didn't know about cars because she just didn't have any interested in them. If she had, she knew she would probably own Montreal, because there just wasn't anything she couldn't do just because she was a woman. So, yes, she had bought about 5 books about cars and read them in the last two weeks. She'd had read articles on cars and made pools with her employees about them. She even visited one of their fabrics last week. Her meeting with Callie, yesterday? That had almost been canceled because she needed to be prepared for this meeting today.

"So, I have a hundred million and twenty five thousand things to do after kind of skipping a whole night of work", she said hurriedly, stopping at one of the glass doors on third floor. "Mr. Newman, do you have the budgets ready for this evening?" He said yes and she resumed walking. Yes, she could just had called, but she knew her presence would make a better impact. Besides, she always hated the idea of a thousand people working for her without having seen her face once. It was ridiculous and inconsiderate. She made sure everyone in this company knew her, personally, from the COO to Miss Martha, one of the sweet ladies who worked on their kitchen. Yes, Miss Martha's coffee was never the best, but she was improving.

"Not worth it?" Teddy asked, curious, following Arizona around. Her friend had texted her last night to ask about her and Callie's… "meeting". She brushed her off. Only to find Teddy waiting for her this morning in her office.

"That's not what I said, at all." Last night was… different. She had enjoyed her time with Callie more than she would like to admit. It had been something knew in her routine. Something good. Something fresh and somehow exciting.

"What do you want me to do? Go to work and guess from Callie's face how it went?" My Jesus Christ, couldn't Teddy just wait until later tonight? After she had nailed her presentation and sealed one more big deal for her company? Didn't Teddy have any heart to cut open?

She ignored the question and stopped at one more glass door. "Carla, I need the portfolios done and in the meeting room by 5pm. Oh, and remember to bring me the last prints from all of our campaigns. I want to bring it all home tonight with me to take a look. One more thing, I need you to start working on our Easter content for this year. I've sent all of the designs and a list of everything we will need to you. Check your computer."

"Why the hell are you doing Barbara's job, Arizona?"

"I'm not doing Barbara's job. You don't see me working often, Teddy. That's me. I like having control. Besides, I gave Barbara so many things to do this last week that I'm pretty sure I should be paying her twice what she is recieving. She might quit any minute from the pressure."

"Where is Karev in all this?"

As soon as Teddy closed her mouth, Karev appears, getting out of the elevator, cellphoneon the ear. "I don't give a fuck about how you will fix it. You know it had to be done by today since the day we signed the contract. If we don't have those prototypes done and delivered here by 3pm, don't wait anything good from us. We know how to make good advertisement. We know how to make bad advertisements too."

Ops. Things were… Crazy. Teddy definitely preferred an open chest bleeding out than this. This here, it was maddening. She wasn't about to let the subject go that easily, though.

"That would be totally possible, you know? Her feelings are always all around her face. There is no mask. She doesn't even know what putting on a mask is."

"Teddy, you are being a little weird. To say the least." Teddy was always nosy, but this was not her normal self.

"I'm just happy I have two days off. Can you believe it?" Two days off and she chose to come here? Surgeons are crazy.

"No. I have no idea what two days with no work is like since I was 18." She was really holding herself not to just tell Teddy to go home It was proving to be a hard task.

"Wow. Yeah… That was a long time ago."

"You forget you're older than me, Theodora." Maybe calling her Theodora would help?

"Tell me." Arizona stopped walking and turned to look at Teddy, sighing. It was 9 am and she was already tired of this day. It didn't help she had went to sleep at 2 am trying to do some work. It didn't help she didn't have the prototypes for the meeting done. It didn't help Teddy was extra annoying today. It didn't help she couldn't spend more and half an hour without seeing Callie's smile in her mind.

"We had coffee. And I took her to watch the sunset at Elysian Park and to swing in the hidden swing there." She said flatly and nonchalantly. Hoping it was good enough for Teddy to just stop asking and live her to do her work.

"Wow."

"What?" Arizona looked around and gave a few steps towards the elevator, pressing the button and turning her attention back to her friend.

"I didn't know there was a romantic in you." The blonde surgeon mocked.

"It was not romantic." It wasn't.

"Come on, Arizona." Teddy indulged, entering the elevator, followed by Arizona, who pressed the ground floor button.

"It wasn't. It was sweet, I think. And fun. And the sunset was beautiful, of course."

"You just described romantic."

"We just talked and got to know a little bit more of each other. We didn't… act like people who are romantically involved." Arizona declared, trying to convince herself that she didn't want romantic feelings gravitating around them. Not… just yet.

"Why?" Teddy's voice sounded along with the elevator ding and they walked out. This was Arizona's way of showing Teddy out of the building. They were near the entry, the sliding glass doors to the street a few meters away.

"Because, I don't know… We just met, Teddy. I don't even know yet what I want out of it." It was true. She didn't know how to describe it any better than that. Except for the fact she left unspoken. She liked Callie.

"Okay. Well, I'm not saying you should marry her, but… Be careful, alright? I only know Callie for three months and she is a really nice person. Someone recently just plain dumped her and… She doesn't deserve to be hurt."

"Shouldn't you be saying that to her about me? 'If you hurt my best friend I'll kill you'?" She tried to joke, but the information of Callie's recent heartbreak didn't feel good inside. It made her own heart constrict. Because why anyone hurt someone like Callie?

"No. Because you hardly get hurt by women. She has been hurt by lovers more than once." Okay. This was too much information for a day and she didn't feel good or right knowing things that personal about Callie when it wasn't the brunette who let her know about it. She felt like invading her privacy and betraying her trust.

"This is not a game, Teddy. I'm not playing with her. For now, we are new friends."

"Yeah… Just make sure she knows about that." Teddy fixed her jacket on her left arm and adjusted her glasses over her eyes before walking to the exit.

Arizona watched her and saw stop right by the door. Looking back. "And Zona, daisies and sunsets and swings are nothing like you… Or weren't. Make sure with your heart if what you want is really just friendship." Then she was gone. Arizona was left to ponder her affirmation. It was true. Daisies, sunsets and swings were not like her. Not the 'her' everyone knew. And maybe the fact that she was glad it was the version of her Callie got to know shouldn't warm her heart as it did right know. What did that mean?

She felt a presence by her side and noticed she had walked a few steps while thinking and looking outside to where Teddy had just exited. She looked to her left and saw Julie staring at her. How much did she hear? "Hm, Julie… I need you to send the people coming to the meeting this evening straight to the meeting room. Make them take the elevator that goes directly to there. You should ask for the security to close the doors of the building and accompany them there."

Julie was probably the only person who wasn't overwhelmed with tasks these days. It wasn't fair, Arizona thought. Julie was not just a receptionist. And she had to admit that she actually needed Julie's services. Much more these days. Her work had triplicated in the last two months. Maybe it was time for some new arrangements. "You can stay and watch the meeting if you want. And tomorrow we can discuss your job. I think we should give you something else to do. If you agree…" Julie nodded. Arizona walked back to the elevator. The day was just beginning.

* * *

Today was a good day for Callie Torres. Two successful surgeries and one more paper accepted to be published in a medical journal. She was almost fluctuating on the hospital corridors. She knew her happiness was not only due to that. Some swing action last night was. She smiled to herself while remembering how she faked an almost fall from the swing last night, for Arizona's complete shock. The blonde made the best face of terror ever and when Callie started laughing and her companion gave her the most serious glare she felt like she was in trouble. 'What? You told me to pretend I'm 14. Teenagers do stupid stuff'. Arizona had smiled her way and taken her hand, pushing her to her car. 'Well, this 14 years old puts herself in too much danger. And the 16 year old here needs to end the dream and get back to the reality of having a ton of work. Is it okay if I drive you back home?' They drove back partially in silence. Callie liked to think it was because they both were resenting the fact that their time together that night was over. She said her goodbye's to Arizona with a kiss on the cheek. The feeling was like a shock. Her warm lips touching the cold skin on a blushing cheek. Arizona's face was soft as a pillow on a monday morning. And…

"Dr. Torres. You're in a good mood."

"What?"

"You're extra happy. How is your friend? Did you guys had that coffee? Flagstaff, Arizona, USA…" Oh, boy, if she thought nothing could change her humor today. April most definitely could.

"Oh, spare me, April."

"Sorry…"

"What do you want?" The ortho surgeon asked after April just kept following.

"Nothing."

"You're just free? Unoccupied?" Callie was incredulous. Really? This girl had problems.

"Basically. Do you have patients for me to check on?"

"No. But you can bring me that coffee. And a doughnut with chocolate and sprinkles."

"Doughnuts with chocolate with sprinkles? That is a too perky food for you." Yeah, it was a too perky food for Arizona too, but stil… The blonde ate it like a kid after two months in strict sweet's diet.

"Just go, April. And I'll let you get in my next surgery." She watched April's eyes budge. "IF… you promise to keep your mouth shut about anything that is not related to the surgery."

April disappeared in an instant. She laughed. April was a good person. She was just… Too much sometimes.

"Flagstaff, Arizona, USA. What is that about?" She turned to look at Mark behind her.

"People just won't let me alone today, as it seems", she answered, partially annoyed. She didn't want her good mood questioned. She just wanted to keep the good spirit going. Hard task when everyone was so nosy around here.

"What?"

"Arizona invited me for coffee." Better just get it done with.

"Oh, no. Really?" What, was it so hard to believe? She questioned herself watching the incredulous look on Mark's face.

"Yes. I made an idiot out of myself, sent her a message basically calling her a coward for nor calling me and minutes later April gives me a box sent by her to the hospital with daisies and a card inviting me for coffee."

"No way." The smirk on his face was so big and so malicious…

"Yes way", she laughed.

"You went for coffee with her? And now you're all dreamy walking on the corridors of the hospital, waking up smiling and singing Disney songs in the shower aren't you?"

"No." She wasn't singing Disney songs. It was too much for badass Callie Torres.

Mark laughed in her face. So much it drew people's attention. "Right… How was it?" He asked after Callie stopped pulling him towards the ortho on call room.

"It was sweet. There was coffee and talk and sunset and a swing", she said in an almost singing voice.

"Swing and sunsets, huh? No kisses?"

"Yes, kisses. On the cheek."

"Now that's just dumb…" because dirty mark couldn't meet a girl without having her in his bed. She rolled her eyes.

"Wasn't it you who told me to get to know her before falling in love."

"Yes… it never works like that with you, though." Couldn't he just support her?

"Maybe it will this time." Callie was standing with her back rested on the on call room door. Mark sitting in one of the bunk bed in front of her.

"Really?" Really. She actually believed it. Because she liked Arizona. And for once, liking someone didn't come with the sense of losing control. But with the sense of getting control over her love life. Maybe it was the fact that Arizona didn't demand anything from her. She was just free to be herself and free to have whatever emotions she had.

"I like her, Mark. She is a beautiful, intelligent, intriguing, mysterious, sweet and attentive woman. There isn't any way someone would not fall for her. I'm not saying I did. I'm saying that I know, if she allows it, that it will happen. I'll give myself the right to be dreamy about her because she is new and exciting and just what I needed to feel better these days. But, for now, I think we are just friends."

 _"_ _The way your eyes hold me standing backstage_

 _I'll find my way from the old road, but I don't know when_

 _I think that I'm beginning to care…"_

 _(The Boys – Lisa Mitchell)_

* * *

AN: If I say anything to apologize for the long wait it will all be interpreted as excuses, right? I'm really really sorry about it, though. I was, am, dealing with a lot of stuff on my life. My work like, my family life, my personal life, my fraternal life. And I didn't want to deliver small chapters because I personally hate them, as you may already know. In fact, this is the biggest chapter from all I've posted. I feel bad about the whole month it took me to update because I know you guys involuntarily loose interest on the story. I do have some holidays ahead and I'll try to get this story going faster. I would really like to deliver a chapter each week. But I know I won't be able to do it. So, I'll just try not to take a whole month again and give you guys an update every two weeks. And if I finish a chapter earlier, I will deliver it as soon as I'm done with it. Pleeeease, let me know what you think about their first "date", unofficial date. Really. I aprecciate all of the reviews. Also, all mistakes are mine. Sorry for typos and grammar erros and... yeah!


	8. Chapter 8: Talk tonight

**Chapter 8: Talk tonight**

 _"_ _We belong, we belong to the light_

 _Throw love in the fire and into the fight…"_

* * *

It seemed that no amount of time would ever be enough for Arizona to do everything she needed to do. If every person in Los Angeles gave her an hour of their days, it would still not be enough. She had started to come to work earlier, skipping her morning run, and go home even later. There were nights in the last week in which it was only her and the security guys at the building till 1 or 2 am. And when she got home, she simply couldn't sleep.

Exhaustion was dominating her body. She just hoped it could handle the stress for one more month. Just one month more and she would… No. She couldn't take vacations. But she could slow down a little bit. Couldn't she? All of her bigger projects were due to end in the next weeks and she would be left with smaller things to sort out and her book to finish, which weren't exactly little or less important things. But it would be easier, more manageable.

"Mom, I seriously don't have time for this…" It was 10 in the morning and her mother was annoying the crap out of her about her dress for Tim's wedding. Yes, she should have tried it on again last week, but hell, at what time? She was loaded to the maximum with work… "Mom… I'm serious. If I can write, produce, launch a whole freaking campaign in three weeks, they surely can adjust a dress, which is already made, in a few days…" The days of retired people must have 36 hours while hers seemed to have only 12. "I CAN'T, Mom. I can't… Yes. I know there is only 4 weeks till the wedding… No, I don't know when I will have time. Mom…" She couldn't keep this going when there was people waiting on her to work on things. And, as always, her mom won. For now, at least. "Okay. Alright. Tell them to be here tomorrow morning by 7am… Well, it's that time or no time", she said when her mother contested and exposed the fact that they only started working at 8am. "Alright…. And I'm sorry, mom, but I'm really having a few really busy, hectic days. Okay. Love you. Bye." God, mothers… She loved her mom dearly, with all of her heart, but sometimes she was just too much.

Looking ahead she was met with an amused Karev, a grin on his face. She raised an eyebrow, daring him to comment anything he had just heard in her conversation with her mother.

"How long, Karev?" They had paid someone who worked independently to draw a few sketches for them. It was for the new commercial they should release for airing in three weeks. A big organization who worked with volunteering projects in Africa had just been donated a big amount of money to build a 5 schools and 15 orphanages for the kids who had lost their parents or whose parents lived in extreme poverty. They had looked for VOX because they knew she would be the one capable of transmitting exactly what they wanted. The commercial was supposed to help the organization with the donations they would need to sustain the schools and orphanages after they were built.

So, she had this big idea of asking them to film some of the kids they knew would be beneficed with the donation drawing how they imagined their new schools and homes would be. This LA architect was known for working basically with sketches and she just had to have him working with them. And yes, her deadline was really small and the architect was a busy person too. But this? This was important. And she wasn't paying him little money. All of the contrary. She was giving him a considerable part of her own personal savings to have this done. It was part of her contribution in this. She was charging nothing on the beneficent organization and taking personal money to make this work. This wasn't her bigger project, but this was her baby project and she would be damned if she didn't deliver it exactly how she had envisioned.

"Around two to three weeks?", he offered apologetically. She had made Alex responsible for the contact with the man. He had accepted but apparently he needed more time than she was expecting.

"In days… I need a dead line in days." She sat on her office chair and sighed, looking at the celling for a few seconds to steady herself.

"I don't know, Arizona. It's not me who is doing the freaking work." Yeah, everyone's mood was altered these days and Karev was no exception.

"Well, I want a day by tomorrow morning. I don't know what you will have to do, just give me a freaking dead line for this." Alex was usually a really competent person, but would it be necessary for her to personally call the man and make it happen faster? "And no more than 10 days. The commercial has to be up in three weeks. I can't have access to the sketches only 3 days before the airing. That's absurd."

She had sent one of her filming teams to set everything up in the architects house. He was instructed on what he should do to record the process of him drawing. Her people had left his office with a whole scenario build in, the kids drawings and a print of a very appealing bank deposit to his account on his desk. What more motivation did he need?

"I'll see what I can do." He simply said when he saw the frustration on her face. Arizona was drowning herself lately. She had black circles around her eyes, basically no make up. And if he had been observant enough, she surely had lost a pound or two. If she kept going like this, she would need more than one fitting for that dress…

"Make it happen or simply send them to hell."

* * *

"Hey, stranger. What are you up to?" Arizona instantly smiled when she answered her phone and heard Callie's voice. Since they met for coffee a couple of weeks ago, they had only talked on the phone. Three days after their swing session at the park, Arizona felt confident enough to call the brunette. Since then, they had been talking frequently through text or call every other day to know how the other was doing Things between them have been… easy. And fun. And just natural.

"Hey, genius. Up to no good", Arizona's smile grew wider when she heard a small laugh coming from the other side of the line.

"Scaring all your employees?", she asked, amused.

"Basically. You?" The blond was walking to Norman's office, the editor, to see what they already had to start the commercial about the Africa project. The videos with the kids drawing had been sent to them two days ago and she needed to meet him to give some details about how she wanted it to look like in the final product.

"Day off. Wanna meet for lunch?" Arizona was immediately bummed, because yes, she did want to meet the other woman. She had actually craved her presence this week more than once. Talking on the phone would never be the same as seeing Callie's face.

"Uh… I don't really know if I can get out of here. It's crazy, Callie. Everything is upside down." She lamented while hanging her head down in disappointment. Even if Callie couldn't see it.

"Oh… Well, I could… Maybe I could bring lunch?" Arizona would in fact love just that. A 30min brake to have lunch with a special someone. But…

"I wouldn't bother you that much, Callie." She couldn't expect that it would be enough for Callie. And it didn't sound exactly fair either.

"You aren't. I offered." Her words were met with silence while Arizona thought about it. "But it's okay if you can't. We can meet some other time." God, that voice sounding so clearly disappointed. She knew Callie had no idea she was sounding like that.

"No. No… It's okay." She quickly answered and looked at the watch on her wrist. "If you don't mind. I would love having lunch with you here. Around noon? Is that okay?" It would be enough time to talk to Norman and fix some other things. She just hopped Callie could be here so soon. It was already past 11 am.

"Yeah… I'll be there." And by the tone os the her voice she knew Callie was smiling, which instantly brought a smile to her face too.

"Let me take care of the lunch, though. Please. I'm already making you come here. And with really not much time to plan any lunch", she offered.

"But weren't you super busy?", Callie mocked.

"That's why I have an assistant, Calliope. Besides, I know how to make a call for delivery, myself. Any preferences?" The elevator door opened and she got in, pressing the number 4 on the panel.

"Okay. And no… I think I would just like to avoid salads for today."

"Alright. I'll surprise you. See you in a bit." Callie's bye came through the phone and she instantly dialed another number while waiting for the elevator to arrive at the fourth floor. "Barbara? I'm sorry, but remember the order for lunch you put in a few minute ago? Yes… I need you to cancel it and call the Vineyards' instead. I need lunch for two… Exactly. You know what I usually like. So, two different meals, though. For noon, you think that is possible? Alright… I'll make sure you are rewarded for that, Barbs. And of course, you can order anything you want too… I know… Thanks." With a small smile and an extra bounce in her steps she walked out of the elevator and knocked on Norman's door.

"Okay. I'm here. But we need to do it fast. Think we can go through it in 30 minutes?" The man nodded and she sat on a chair right beside him, putting on the head phones and watching some scenes play on the many screens.

* * *

An hour later, Arizona was in what she was calling her personal heaven for the day. Eating lunch, no worries for about half an hour, a pretty girl talking and smiling her way. But not just any girl. Callie had arrived just in time, with a bag of goodies in her hands, claiming that she was responsible for dessert.

It was the first time she ever entered the building. The blonde delighted herself in the image of a fascinated Callie, eyes shining while looking around. VOX was a big building. Not as big as the hospital the ortho surgeon worked at, but big nonetheless. It had a total of 5 floors and was mainly designed in glass, in some kind of balloon shape. All the money Arizona had saved from her first and second books were used to start building it, along with the money of her first big campaigns. This building as it was now, was only completely finished a year ago. Three years after the company was created. Every piece of concrete came from sweat. And she was proud of it as she would never be of anything else she did.

For outsiders, Arizona may be seen like a rich business woman who sleeps over a bed of 100 dolar bills. But even if that could become a reality right now, rich was never something Arizona thought herself as. Because if you had access to her bank account since she was a teenager until a couple of years ago, you would never find more than a couple dozens of thousand dollars. She did win her first million years ago and many other millions after that, but all of that money was in the walls of this building, which employed now 1047 people, from cleaning personal to herself. This material piece of the world was her pride and joy, and she was happy to have Callie here.

"So, basically you're telling me they didn't accept your article for the journal?" She asked mid chew, the woman sitting in front of her only nodding. "They're idiots." They were. Because Callie was brilliant. In the last two weeks Callie had sent her a little bit of her article to read. And her mind just couldn't grasp it, because it was too much brain put on a piece of paper. For someone with her IQ, she was actually disappointed in herself when she didn't really understand what it said. They had talked about it for an hour one night, Callie laughing in her ear at her confusion, while explaining what she had wrote. It was fascinating for her. Imagine how fascinating it was for those who actually worked with it. The people from this science journal? Stupid people.

"Or not", Callie declared, disappointed, but resigned, it seemed.

"What did they say, though?" This food was as delicious as she remembered. Apparently Callie thought so, too. Because for someone who didn't want salad, the small noises she was making while eating it were very appreciative. She put her small bow aside and looked at the brunette. They were sat in an extra round table she had on her office, one she used when she wanted to spread more papers and banners and work more freely without her desktop getting in the way.

"That it was inconsistent."

"What?"

"Yeah. Well, I have no fault if what I do is too much for them to grasp", the brunette shrugged, too engrossed in her meal to care about anything else.

"You're brilliant." Arizona reassured her, smiling. Watching brow eyes go from the bow in her hands to look directly into her own.

"Oh, shut up", she said, mouth full, a hand coming to her lips to cover her chuckle, which made Arizona laugh.

"You are. And the case must be exactly what you just said. Is it the best ortho journal out there?"

"No?" There was an expression of incredulity on her face as if the question was absurd. Arizona knew by now that Callie was a confident woman when it came to her job. But, apparently, not as much as she showed. And as much as it pleased her that the brunette was comfortable enough with her to show insecurity, she didn't want the other woman to feel like that because there was no reason for it.

"Well, you should try the best. Because you're the best."

"Arizona…" She warned, as if Arizona's declaration came from a feeling of pity. It was not the case here, at all.

"Just saying. This… What you do… it is important. And people deserve to have your work changing their lives. I say you try to send it to the best one." The ortho surgeon just looked at her, fork in her hand. "Read it again, fix what you may think is the problem and send it. Everything must be tried more than once…"

"Okay." She simply said. Arizona decided not to force. It was clear that it was bothering the other woman. Anyone would feel bothered discussing supposed failures. So, she changed the subject.

"For someone who said didn't like salad…" Salad hadn't be the only thing they ate. Vineyards was without a doubt one of Arizona's favorite restaurants in the whole world. It wasn't the fanciest or the most expensive one, but it was there at the top of her list of favorite food. Because they had all of her favorite pastas and one of the best salads. When Callie said she didn't want salad… Well, Arizona just had to try. So, she ordered two of her favorite pastas and salads to let Callie pick. It was a safe move. And here she was, already sharing her favorites with this woman, who she only really got to know a month ago.

"This? This here is a real salad." She pointed to it to emphasize. "You should try the salad in the hospital. It's a sad salad." She declared scrunching her nose to what Arizona deduced was the thought of the hospital's salad.

"A sad salad?" She asked, brows furrowed, trying to imagine what a sad salad looked like.

"Yeah, dead leaves turning brow and really terribly cut vegetables. You look at it and gets sad." The last bit of the food was shoved into her mouth after she described the offending meal at her work place. Callie put her own bow on the table and rested her back on the chair she was sitting.

"It does sound sad." Lettuce, carrots and tomatoes with sad smiles appeared in her head. But then again, even the beautiful vegetables would be sad to be eaten, right? Unless it was by Callie's mouth. Wait… What? She instantly recriminated herself as she noticed the bad use of words her mind had done.

"So… What now?" Unfortunately, their time together would be soon cut short. It was 12:41, right now, she checked on her watch. She had a meeting in a few minutes. The sad conclusion came to her.

"In about 3 minutes I have a meeting." As if on cue, a knock sounded on her office door, a head popping to see if she could enter. Arizona nodded and watched as a slightly tensed Julie entered the room. She was tense herself. Even if Callie didn't know Julie was her ex and Jullie didn't know Callie was her potential… something? She took a deep breath, though, and decided to say nothing, waiting for Julie to say what she had come to say.

"Arizona, Barbara asked me to remember you about the meeting, since she had to go get those files at the Norigian Building." She had entered the room, but remained close to the door. Before Arizona could say anything, Callie greeted Julie with a smile. The brunette had actually asked about Julie a few times before, as a doctor checking on her patient. Yes, she could easily read her files and know about her progress since the young woman was still going to therapy once a week. But it wasn't the same as knowing how she was doing in her normal life. Callie never questioned about her pictures in the magazine and it seemed that the brunette just thought of it as an isolated fact, having nothing to do with Julie's assault and her stolen cellphone. She hadn't told anyone besides Alex, Teddy, her parents and Tim about how the pictures came out. She did intend on talking about it with Callie someday, but… It was still too soon in this… whatever they were doing.

"Hey, Julie. I see you're doing very well."

"Yes, I'm good Dr. Torres. Thank you." Julie was polite and Arizona noticed she tried not to act surprised at Callie's presence in her office and the scene clear in front of her eyes. Noticeably it was at the least a friendly visit, with all the food at the table and the way Callie's shoes were out of her feet. The brunette had come from a 20 hour shift and was exhausted, she had said, right before Arizona offered she'd take her shoes off, taking her own heals in the process.

"Thank you, Julie. I'm heading there in a few." Quick to answer, she tried to avoid the situation for longer, dismissing the woman. Julie had come back to being her assistant, but one who didn't deal with her personal stuff. She was there for business only and worked for Karev, too.

"So, that's my cue." Callie was already reaching for her shoes. Arizona didn't want the moment to be over just yet. They hadn't even eaten the dessert Callie had brought. It was macaroons, just one more of her favorite things in the world.

"I'm sorry. I wish we could talk a little more. But…" She tried to explain, bus was interrupted.

"You don't have to explain, Arizona. It's your job." She said with a smile, standing from the chair after putting her shoes on. "And I'm glad we could meet. Maybe you should try the salad at the hospital someday." She joked, which Arizona hoped was only half joke.

"I'll give it a try if it means I can hang out with the ortho goddess." She winked in return, watching the brunette bush, and stood from her own chair.

"Call me when you have a free time?"

"Absolutely." Offering her dimpled smile, Arizona reluctantly walked Callie to the door.

"Well, that's me", Callie said and laughed at her own joke, making Arizona's inside turn. She wasn't sure when she would be able to see her again and not knowing made this a little more difficult. Next thing she knew, Callie's lips came in contact with her left cheek, staying there for longer than a friendly kiss normally would. Closing her eyes, she enjoyed the feeling and shivered when she heard Callie whisper close to her ear. "I loved being here with you." And with that she was gone, their eyes crossing quickly before blue averted to a red smiling mouth disappearing behind the door.

Her cheek was without a doubt warm, while the rest of her body was still chilly from the shiver. This sensation was for Arizona like an old friend who she hadn't seen in a very long time. And it felt good. Clearing her thoughts from the sweet moment they had just shared, she walked to the table and grabbed the box full of macaroons to eat on her way to the meeting room. Getting her phone from her desk, she texted Callie a thank you for the sweet treat and walked out, deciding to ignore Julie's weird behavior as they entered the elevator together to continue with one more exhaustive day.

* * *

This was completely messed up. Here she was, in front of a house she had visited a million times over the years, but she couldn't make herself push the doorbell. After leaving Arizona's office, she went straight to the airport. She had flying tickets to Miami at 2pm. She had sent Aria a text a few weeks ago telling her she would come visit whether she liked it or not. After months without really talking with her sister, Callie was pleasantly surprised when the younger brunette didn't push her away completely, setting a date for her to come, instead of just showing up unexpected. And that was all they talked. Until today, when she boarded the plane and sent a text telling Aria she was about to depart.

She hadn't told Arizona about it. In fact, wanting to meet Arizona today was something she felt she needed to do to calm herself. To ground her feelings. To settle her anxiousness. In the last two weeks they had been talking, Callie had constantly felt the need to share things with Arizona. Little things like the fact that she had drank the Hawaiian coffee that morning. Or that she had suddenly developed a taste for sprinkled doughnuts. She wanted to tell her about her surgeries, about the progress of her cartilage. She wanted to comment on that crappy episode of Friends she watched last Saturday even though Friends was one of her favorite tv shows. And yes, she wanted to talk with Arizona about today. But she wanted to do it personally. Their lunch was amazing, not only because of the food, but because of her company. And it went by so quickly… Before she knew it, Julie was knocking on Arizona's office door. And all the calm she was feeling in the presence of the blonde woman went away as soon as she walked out and thought back to what she was going to do next, to board a plane…

Looking at the button right next the door, Callie sighed and nervously waited for the door to open. It was now just past 10pm in Miami. It was late, she knew. But she wanted to get this over with and Aria had said she could come as soon as she landed. What her sister had in mind, Callie was totally oblivious about.

The door being open in front of her brought her back to reality. A really sweet reality, she might add. There, head laid on her mother's shoulder, sleepy eyes and all, was the baby she was already completely in love with.

"Oh, my God." It was all she could say. She looked between the baby and her sister. Tears starting to fill her eyes. It had been a long time since they last saw and looking at her baby sister with a baby of her own was making her all kinds of emotive. Aria gave her a small smile, while rubbing the baby's back. Alana should be sleeping by now, she supposed. "Can I? Please?" She was stretching her luck too much, but she needed to hold the baby, as much as she needed to hug her sister. And right now Callie felt that getting a hug would be an even bigger stretch. She just needed contact with her family. In any form.

Opening the door more and giving Callie space to walk in without saying a word, Aria gently moved Alana around so her aunt could hold her.

"Hi… Hi, munchkin. You are so so so beautiful. You know that? Yes, you are. You are the most precious girl ever." Callie spoke to the little girl in a calm tone, cautiously letting the baby's body rest against her own. If for the the fact she was so sleepy or because Alana had actually liked Callie, she just let herself be held, eyes blinking heavily.

Aria stood watching the interaction for a few seconds, before offering… "Hm… Do you wanna sit?" The younger Torres sister didn't quite know what to say. She had always loved Callie. And this, the situation they were in, was a mess and a big misunderstanding. She would never cut Callie completely off of her life. It was just unimaginable, but…

"Thank you, Aria. For this." She was now sitting with the small bundle of cuteness in the corner of the living room couch, a hand tenderly rubbing the baby's back.

"It's okay." Aria said smiling. It was in fact a beautiful image. She had no doubt that Callie would be the best aunt her daughter could ever ask for. Matthew's sisters could never come close. And right now she was just glad her sister had the courage to contact her and insist on this happening. She was glad that Callie was given her the light of the day, because after what she did, she never thought they would actually talk again.

"Do they know I'm here?" She actually hoped their parents didn't know she was here. She didn't need her father to come with a priest trying to save her from hell again. That was just… Horrible. Upon seeing Aria shake her head no, she was relieved. "Good… I think."

"How are you, Callie?" Aria asked after silence was the only thing heard for minutes. Her sister looked perfectly happy to just snuggle the baby and put her to sleep.

"Hm… I'm good. But, you know, if you really wanted to know how I was you could have just called. It's been what? 10 months?" She looked from Alana's face to her little sister's. Aria looked vulnerable and this was going completely different than she expected. "I needed you. You're my sister and…"

"I'm sorry, Callie. I really am…" Aria sighed and came to sit at the opposite side of the couch, looking directly in her sisters eyes. "I was trying to process it. I know I took long. But mom and dad were going crazy, and I had just discovered I was pregnant. They didn't know it yet. I needed… I needed time. I had this bomb drop into my life and I needed time to come to terms with it. Alana… She is my light, but she was never planned. She just came out of nowhere. Matthew and I, we weren't that good at the time, we had a big fight just a month before I found out I was pregnant. It was a mess. And then I actually had the baby and she needed me to be good and to be stable and to do everything for her and to give her love. And I… I needed to be with her and connect with this new part of me in the world and time for me and Matthew to get back to the place we were before everything went down for us." Callie saw Aria look somewhere else and take a deep breath. "It was selfish, but… "

"What has changed?"

"Not much really. But I don't hate you for being a lesbian, Callie."

"Bi." Callie corrected.

"What?"

"Bissexual."

"Yeah. I don't hate you for that." Aria gave her a small smile. "I'm married, but a kid was not in my plans, for a long time. And I was sensitive and confused, myself. I just didn't know what to do."

"Now you do?" Callie couldn't really blame her sister. She understood. Yes, she understood. But couldn't she maybe have given her a call to say she was okay with it and that she could count on her? Even if she needed time, she could just have let Callie know she was okay with it. It would have made a difference for her.

"Not really. I've wanted to contact you many times. But I was actually embarrassed for what I did. I'm glad you sent me that message that day. And I'm sorry I've been distant even after that. I just thought we needed to talk, face to face. And I'm glad you're here now, because Alana deserves her aunt cuddles." Aria said looking to the little baby sound asleep on her aunt's arms.

"I wanna hold her forever." A smile instantly formed on Callie's face, when her own eyes averted to her niece.

"Well, that is impossible unless you come back to Miami and comes to live here." Aria declared with a laugh.

"Really? You won't let me take her with me?" Callie pouted.

"No way!"

"She is precious." Oh, the love Callie already felt for this little girl. She couldn't describe it.

"She is… Do you… Are you here alone? Did your girlfriend come with you?" Aria seemed hesitant. This kind of conversation was something they used to do all the time when they were teenagers. To talk about boys and relationships was one of their favorite things to do in their younger years. After Callie moved to LA, it stopped being their thing, because then, Callie had Addison, who she shared a room with. And her talks with her little sister became more and more rare. They were far away, living completely different times in their lives. It was only normal. Talking about this right now made her full with a content sense of nostalgia.

"Uh, I don't have a girlfriend anymore…"

"No? What happened?" Her sister sounded actually interested, sitting more comfortable on the couch and bringing her legs up to rest closer to her body.

"She just left." Callie simply declared. Because it was in fact simple as that. The blonde woman had just left her.

"I'm sorry."

"Don't be. I'm not. Not anymore." Trully, she wasn't.

"Are you seeing anyone?" They were really doing this. Talking as sisters should talk. Callie wanted to be angry at her sister and to say what she had played in her head so many times after she was completely forgotten by her family. But right now she couldn't. She didn't want to anymore. Because if you think about it, what good would it bring?

"Not really. But I wish I was seeing someone I know." She laughed nervously just as the image of Arizona popped into her mind. She looked at Aria with a sheepish smile which her sister returned.

"Boy? Or girl?"

"Girl! Sorry." She laughed again, because why not. She couldn't really believe Aria was not only okay with this, but was interested in her love life.

"Hmm… Good luck with that one?"

"Thanks." 'I'll definitely need', she thought to herself. Arizona was worth a try, though. More than one try, actualy. "So, you're good with this part of me?" The brunette needed a confirmation so she could just move on from it and be happy and not afraid of suddenly have her sister turn her back for her again or have the right of being a part of her niece's life been taken from her.

"Yes, Callie. I'm not saying I wanna see you making out with woman or being all lovey dovey with one. For now, at least… I think I'll take a little time until I'm used to that. But yeah… I'm okay with it."

"Does it mean I can come visit Alana whenever I want?" She carefully squeezed the sleeping baby in her arms to emphasize how much she hoped for it.

Aria smiled her way, truly hopping Alana didn't wake up. It seemed the little girl had felt her mother's tension upon the arrival of her aunt and just didn't budge to sleep at all. Normally Matthew was able to make her sleep in a heartbeat, but her husband was on a trip to Las Vegas to deal with some business from her father's company, and should only be home in two days. "Yes. It does. She likes you already, it seems."

"And I love her. Don't I, beautiful? Tia Callie loves Alana very much. A whole lot. Now tell me. Did mama gave you my presents?" She talked to the baby, who she knew, sleeping or not, would never answer. It was just too good to be here with her. It was Callie's first niece, she couldn't avoid being like this with the baby.

"I did. She loves the stuffed bunny. And the grey and mint blanket. She always sleeps better when she has it under her." It was true, apparently, her 5 hundred dollars crib set was not enough. "How long will you stay?"

"Just two days. I have a lot to work on."

"You should stay here."

"No. It's okay, Aria. I already made the reservation in a hotel." Of course she had a reservation, she never thought coming here would go this easy.

"No. Really. We have enough room. You can take the upstairs guest room. That's actually why I wanted you to come right here, even if it is so late."

Callie looked at her sisters and saw the sincerity in her eyes. A sudden flow of emotion took over her heart, her eyes instantly collecting a few tears, holding them at bay. "You sure?"

"Alana will like having extra cuddle time with her favorite aunt for two days." Aria offered.

And that was really the best answer her sister could give. Moving on the couch, Callie came closer the other woman and used the hand which wasn't holding Alana to give her a hug. "Thank you, Aria. Really…" She shad a single tear, while she heard her sister answer "You will always be welcome, Callie. I love you." Alana was squished inside their hug.

* * *

Lying in bed after taking a shower, Callie looked at the celling in her sister's guest bedroom, thinking about everything that happened today. It all went much better than she could have ever hoped. She could be happy today for the small victory. But it wouldn't be as easy with her parents, for sure. And the knowledge about that actually made her sad. Two days, she had to days with Aria and Alana. It was past 11pm right now. Her body was exhausted, but her mind was uneasy and she couldn't sleep. She got up from the bed to retrieve her phone from her purse. Maybe reading something would help sleep to come. Unlocking it, she saw the small message window notification. Her lips instantly curling up, she read the message.

 **'** **People here want to test my patience. Can you imagine how I am when I'm angry, Callie? No? Oh, yeah, not a pretty image… - A'**

Callie couldn't help but laugh. In fact, she could picture Arizona angry really well. She had always been a really serious person around her. And she wondered if she was always like that with everyone or only with her. Even though she had come to get to know and other side of the blonde woman, it was far from being what Callie imagined to be an Arizona completely at easy and free from worries. She hoped it would happen someday soon.

 **'** **I have a hundred scenarios of you angry in my mind right now. - C'**

She didn't expect her to answer right away. Arizona was busy and the message she sent was from almost two hours ago. And she was in fact right. After answering all of her e-mails and reading through some news on internet, the message popped on her screen, almost half an hour later.

 **'** **You have no love for living, Callie Torres. - A'** The threat made Callie soundly giggle.

 **'** **You would never kill me. Not with your girly hands. - C'**

 **'** **Just because you break bones for a living, it doesn't mean you're stronger. I'm a marine daughter, don't forget about that. - A'**

 **'** **Someone has really pissed you of, huh, marine daughter? - C'**

 **'** **You're poking an angry bear with a stick. - A'**

 **'** **Suck it up, pretty lady. - C'**

 **'** **I would, gladly. - A'** Oh my God. Callie gulped at the innuendo. They sure had flirted before, but never the openly. She wasn't expecting that at all. And now she didn't know what to say. What should she say?

 **'** **You wish…'** And then, **'You have no idea where I am. - C'** Changing the subject was a good thing to do right now, right? She just… didn't know what else to say and in fact, she wanted to tell Arizona about tonight.

 **'** **Where? - A'**

 **'** **Miami. In my sister's guest room. After spending some time with Alana in my arms. - C'**

 **'** **Really? I had no idea you were going there. You were here this afternoon… - A'**

 **'** **I was going to tell you. But… Well, we didn't have that much time and… I don't know. - C'**

 **'** **That is definitely something you should tell me no matter what, Calliope. No matter how busy I am. It I an important thing for you. Is everything alright, then? - A'** Her heart constricted at the feeling of knowing Arizona cared. Before she answered, she laid completely in bed and pulled the sheets over her body. Even in hot Miami, she was never able to sleep without sheets.

 **'** **Yeah… She is okay with it. She said she doesn't hate me and won't deprive me from spending time with my niece. - C'**

 **'** **Good. That's good. How are you feeling? - A'** How was she feeling? Relieved, elated, on the clouds, hopeful, happy. And a little scared too.

 **'** **Pretty good. She is amazing, Arizona. - C'**

 **'** **Your sister? - A'**

 **'** **Alana. I'll send you another pic later. - C'**

 **'I would forgive you if you didn't.** **\- A'**

She wanted to call Arizona and listen to her voice. She was sure it would be just what she needed to have a good night sleep. This, what they had, it was all kinds of awkward. They were not dating, but there was just something a little more than friendship there. And she was sure that Arizona was able to see that too. But they couldn't quite cross that line. She didn't know exactly why.

 **'** **How was the rest of you day? - C'**

 **'** **It didn't end yet., unfortunately. It's not even 9 pm here. - A'**

 **'** **Oh, yeah. There is that. I should let you to it, then… - C'** She didn't want to. But Arizona was busy and she should probably try to sleep.

 **'** **No. Actually, I'm gonna take a 15 minutes break. I will be here for another 2 hours or so… I need to unwind. So… Can I call you and you will tell me more about Miami? - A'**

She could and wanted to tell everything about anything to Arizona. She just needed to ask, like right now. She typed a 'Yes' back and looked at her phone waiting for it to ring.

 _"_ _Now, in and out and all along_

 _Take each day as it comes_

 _Hold on to the ones you love…"_

 _(Get up, Get on – Jill Andrews)_

* * *

 **AN:** Hey, guys. I have no words to apologize for the lack of updates. A LOT has happened in the last 3 months. Things I can't really share here. But I have not been myself lately. I apologize too for the way this chapter was written. I just wrote it and didn't even read it once. So it sure has a whole lot of mistakes. Bear with me there? Also, it probably isn't what you guys want to read after so long without update. But this chapter definitely needed to be written. Next chapter is already half done and I promise to make an effort to update it sooner rather than later. Hopefully you won't need to wait for three months. I feel like a giant failure. And I'm truly truly sorry. I hope you can understand. And I wanna thank you all for the patience and the feedback. This time around I wasn't able to answer all of you guys in the reviews section, but I need to address some people. Please, please let me hear from you. Thank you again for the reviews in the last chapter. You all are very sweet.

GP211: Thank you for worrying about where I was. I'm here. And I promise to try and do a better job.

Apt502: This is not a story in which they will only be together at the end. I plan on having them as girlfriends in about 5 more chapters or something. If I only could update faster, huh? I'm sorry.

FFChik: More work for Julie. Why is everyone so temerous of Julie? Hahaha Don't worry that much about her, guys. She will have her place in this story for a few more chapters but she WON'T cause that much trouble. Thank you for the review.


	9. Chapter 9: My heart came to the party

**Chapter 9: My heart came to the party, my insecurities too**

 _"_ _I can feed this real slow_

 _If it's a lot to swallow…"_

Callie was nervous. For a lot of reasons. One, she was seeing Arizona today after 9 days without looking at her beautiful face. Two, today was an important day for the blonde. Three, she was going to VOX and would meet most of the people in Arizona's life.

She had no idea why things were progressing so naturally slow for them. But she didn't question it all that much. Why to run? Was there any reason for them to run towards something more and bigger? Arizona was any other person, Callie would have without a doubt already made a move. Why couldn't she bring herself to do it with her?

Before her crazy feelings made her even more confuse, she was in front of the VOX's building, passing the glass doors and talking to security, which promptly let her go, heading right to the fifth floor, where the little party was happening.

"You came!" Callie was checking herself in the elevator's mirror, when she heard the dinging of the elevator's door opening and the distinct noise of music and people talking as well as the melodic voice. She was faced with a big room area, which she concluded was the main office of the building. When she brought her eyes towards the owner of the voice, she was graced with the deepest dimples she had ever seen on someone's face. She instantly smiled in return.

"I did. I'm sorry I'm late." Security may have told Arizona she had arrived.

"It's alright. I thought you wouldn't be able to make it at all." Callie thought so too. Early in the afternoon Arizona had called inviting her for a get together at the office to celebrate the contract she had signed today. At the time, Callie was due to get out of the hospital by 6pm, just in time to take a shower and be there at 7pm. She didn't count on an emergency trauma case coming at exactly 5:40pm. She had quickly texted Arizona informing she was going to be late. She just didn't know it was this late. It was almost 9pm, now.

"The surgery run longer than expected, the patient almost died on the table. It was supposed to be simple, but he was in freaking anticoagulants and we didn't know because it was an emergency surgery in a trauma patient who came unconscious and without any family member who could provide us that information. So he tried to die on me. But…"

"Shh…", Arizona said, putting her right index finger over Callie's lips, but quickly pulling it out as she realized what she had done. She was sure her cheeks were a little red, but she tried to cover it with a smile. "He is fine now. Because of you. And now he gets to live and you get to have a glass of wine or beer or whatever you want."

"I'm sorry. This is supposed to be about you." Callie didn't know why she was so nervous.

"It is about me. I'm trying to get you drunk just to make sure it is all about me, don't you see?" She joked, and the brunette was comforted by the fact that Arizona was clearly trying to make her feel a little better. Not only about being late, but about the clear nervousness she was showing.

"You're a dork."

"But adorable, nonetheless." Oh, that the blonde was. Even under the hard front she always put up. Discovering Arizona adorableness was something Callie was completely delighted about. "Come on. Let's get that drink." Arizona took Callie's hand without giving her a chance to react to her comment. The petit woman guided her around some people towards a table with a big variety of drinks.

She looked around while Arizona sorted their drinks. This was not a formal event. This was simple and intimate. Even in the ostensive office room with clearly expensive furniture. A big triangular shaped table, which she supposed was the central piece of the room, was pulled aside and held a big quantity of all kinds of food, sweet and salty. There was a big couch in the opposite corner, where some people were sitting and other were standing close, caught up in what seemed an interesting conversation, all of them with drinks in their hands. There was a big cheesy banner saying "You can't escape, she will run to you" with the Adidas sign, up on the all behind the couch. It made total sense. And she laughed slightly at the intelligent remark in the little phrase. Advertisement people.

"Here" Arizona brought her out of her thoughts, her hand holding a drink, which Callie supposed was red wine. She took it and brought the burgundy liquid to her lips. Her eyes closed involuntarily at the taste. This was good wine. After the long exhausting day she had, there were not really many things that would feel better than drinking the really good beverage.

"So… I think I should congratulate you?" Her lips gave the blonde a sincere smile, which was immediately returned, dimples popping at each side of the beautiful face.

"You should. I just signed a multi-million dollar contract which is supposed to be an extended contract. And that means I'll be doing Adidas commercials and campaigns for the next five years." The excitement in Arizona's voice was almost palpable and it made Callie's heart give little somersaults. She could see this was something Arizona was really happy about. And she should be. A sense of pride invaded the brunette and she didn't really know if it was her place to feel what she felt. But it was there, as many other feelings for this really intriguing and enchanting woman, and she couldn't simply make it go away.

"Five years? What if your commercials suck and they don't want you anymore?" A joke would be a good way to take her out of the cloud of intense reverie. She watched Arizona's face fill with confusion and astonishment. Callie laughed at her. Arizona was just too easy and oh so so so literal with everything.

"I'm kidding. I'm kidding." Callie smirked and held her hands up in surrender. "I'm proud of you. I know for sure the contract will be renewed even before this one you just signed expires. Because, you know… I keep people alive. You keep companies alive." It made Arizona laugh a little, before taking a sip of her own liquid poison.

"That's a nice thing to say. But I can see you're still under the influence of the adrenaline of your last surgery." Sure thing. Her thoughts and feelings and actions were everywhere. Even if her mind was not on the case and the surgery anymore, the remnants of the adrenaline caused by the surgery were still running through her veins.

"I AM pure adrenaline. Do I make your heart beat faster?" Al-right. If she wasn't holding the glass of wine she could just slap her face with both hands. Where the hell did that come from? She tried really hard to keep a confident expression, but her cheeks were burning. And she didn't dare to look at her hands, she knew they would be trembling. Arizona just looked at her, without saying anything. Her face was unreadable. And then she laughed, audibly laughed. Callie sighed in relief, her heart constricting at the sound. It was worth it at the end. Even if Arizona hadn't answered her provoking question.

"You're terrible." The blonde drank from her glass again, all the while looking Callie directly in the eyes.

"Hi, there." It was a moment before the voice entered her brain and she actually got to move her eyes from Arizona's intense gaze to a man she was absolutely sure was Arizona's brother.

"Tim." Simple as that, she just said his name. There was no mistaking here. This could be Arizona's twin. His hair was a bit darker, his dimples a little less deep as he smiled at her, his eyes with just a hint of grey over the bright blue, his jaw more accentuated. But still… Yep. This was Timothy Robbins.

"You must be Calliope." He said, his genuine and cheeky smile getting wider. And apparently, he recognized her too. But how?

"Callie. Yes." She said, extending her hand for him to shake.

"Callie, this is Timothy, my brother. Tim, this is Callie." The blonde introduced them as if they hadn't already done just that.

"I know. I can't see any other tanned ortho goddess brunette here." Tim was still looking at her, still smiling and still holding her hand. It was a little odd. But she, somehow, didn't feel bothered by it.

"Tim", Arizona warned, her face serious, her voice firm. Callie had no idea about how the dynamics worked between the siblings. She only knew Arizona loved her brother really dearly. He couldn't be a bad guy, right? So, looking at Tim's still smiling face, she decided to play along.

"I think I know too. I can't see another blonde prince charming either." Tim laughed and finally freed her hand from their greeting.

"I need to remind you, Callie, that I'm about to get married in a little more than a week", the blonde man replied without giving much attention to the shocked face of his sister.

"And I want to make it clear to you, Tim, that that is a really unfortunate information, since I'm single and blue eyed blondes are totally my type." Arizona would get that, right? The easy, simple, funny flirting through her brother? She hoped so. She liked playing this game with the older Robbins. He was clearly the funny guy, the light of the parties, probably the one everyone liked being around. Because in these two minutes of interaction, she could already say that she liked his presence.

"Oh my God." Tim laughed hard this time and winked at Callie, in understanding. She smiled back at him. "It's a pleasure. It's good to get a face to the mysterious friend Arizona talks so much about." With that simple statement, she felt her stomach flutter. Arizona had talked about her to her brother. The man she loved the most and who was her best friend.

"Likewise. She has told me about you too." A beautiful woman called Tim's name and waved him to go where she was.

"Well, we can catch up later. Fiance duties call." With that, he walked away.

"I'm sorry for that." She heard Arizona's voice while she watched Tim walk away. Arizona had this unsure expression in her face and Callie now felt bad for basically ignoring her during her talk with the man.

"Don't be. He is definitely a nice guy to be around if we can take this brief interaction as a demonstration to how he acts in general." She laughed slightly to try and ease the tension which seemed to take over the other woman's body.

"Oh, you definitely can. That's Tim." She pointed her arm at him in confirmation, exasperated. Callie looked at him again. And then her stomach dropped. Because Tim was now hugging what she concluded was his fiancé and standing beside an older couple. As Tim was undeniably Arizona's brother, those two could only be their parents. Her heart could instantly be felt beating on her throat.

"And those are our parents", came the confirmation from Arizona's lips. Callie couldn't take her eyes off of them and was for sure acting creepy. "They are in town to help with the last preparations for Tim's weeding. Do you… want to meet them?"

The brunette looked back to Arizona and gave her a nervous smile. She couldn't just say no to meeting them. "Sure. I'd love to."

"Come on, then. I wanna introduce you to some other friends too." A warm hand sliding through her own, Callie was pulled into a walking state. She took a deep breath and looked right ahead.

* * *

It had been almost an hour since Callie arrived. Arizona was in between heaven and hell. It was good to have Callie here, better than she liked to admit to herself. The woman had this thing about her. She was captivating. She entered the room and the entirety of people would turn their attention to her because she was beautiful and polite and intelligent and funny and once you looked at her smile you could never take your eyes off of her. But this was starting to get really hard. The controlling her sexual instincts part. There wasn't a single part of Arizona which didn't want to somehow touch any part of Callie. For her body it was hard when they were close to each other. For her mind It was hard when they were a few feet apart and Arizona could see how easily Callie just blended in between her people. It comforted her and tormented her.

She had walked away to get them some drinks with a total sense of happiness and confusion. It was maddening at some level.

"You haven't even kissed the girl yet and she was already introduced to your parents. Hmmm… That sounds… interesting." Teddy approached her near the table where the drinks were at. She didn't need Teddy making things harder for her, right now.

"I didn't have to kiss you to introduce you to my parents." She spit, while pouring some more red wine for Callie.

Teddy laughed audibly. "You never pictured me naked either." She added a little brow twitch to her statement. Head down, now fixing a drink for herself, Arizona couldn't help but smile. Of course Teddy would put the image of a very naked Callie on her mind. It was true, though… She had imagined Callie in her birth suit once or twice. Okay, three times. And it was a beautiful image in her head. Surely would be even more beautiful in reality. "I see your folks already like her."

Both drinks in hand, Arizona turned to look the direction Teddy was fixing her eyes. Callie and her parents were deep in conversation. Even The Colonel seemed very interested. Callie said something that made her mother laugh and her father crack a smile. "She's a doctor, they find it honorable." It was true, her parents found it was honorable to be a doctor. They would be proud of Callie, like they were proud of Teddy. But it wasn't just that. Callie was just…

"Or maybe it is just because she is that amazing." Yeah.

"She is…" Arizona sighed.

"Why didn't you kiss her yet, by the way? She's hot." Jesus, Teddy could be a teenager sometimes. Between her and Tim, she didn't know what to do.

"Didn't you tell me not to play with her feelings?"

"Why kissing her would be play with her feelings?"

"Because I… I…" In any other occasion, kissing a beautiful girl would just naturally happen. There was nothing wrong with kissing people you find attractive, which was undeniably Callie's case. A kiss doesn't have to mean anything, right? Right. But that is only when you know the other person thinks the same. A kiss can be nothing to you and everything to the other person and it wouldn't be fair. Not that kissing Callie wouldn't mean anything for her. All of the contrary. She didn't want to sound presumptuous and think that just because in an ideal scenery she would kiss Callie and the brunette would fall completely in love with her. It wasn't like that. She just knew Callie liked her as much as she knew Callie knew Arizona liked her. Did that sentence even make sense?

"You don't know why."

"I want to. Really. I really do, I just…" It was hard to explain. She didn't even knew it herself.

"What the heck are you doing, Arizona? Seriously. You guys are playing this silly game of being friends when the fact is that you both want the same thing. It doesn't make any sense. It's been months…"

"I'm not pretending to be her friend, I am her friend." She looked Teddy in the eye and then at the glasses in her hand. They would soon start losing their cool temperature. "And the fact is that, if you haven't noticed, I have a ton of things to deal with right now, Teddy. There is work… My book, which had to have the release date changed because I just couldn't get around to finish writing it yet. And Tim's wedding. My parents are in town. Between all of that, I haven't had time to do anything." She closed her eyes and shook her head to clear her mind a little. "It's been months but we only hung out a few times. And only a couple of them were intentional. I'm not ready to give this a go when I know that I won't have enough to give her. And as you said, she has been hurt. What good would it do if I just threw myself at her one night and the other day I couldn't even answer her call because I'm buried deep inside this office?" It was true. Her demanding job always got in middle of her relationships. Always. It was never really a deal breaker for them, but it surely brought some really big disagreements into their lives and she couldn't do with all the work at her office and then all the drama in a new relationship right now. Besides, she actually felt like she wanted to give her undivided attention to Callie. Except, she couldn't.

"You do have a point, but that is not the only reason. I know you, Arizona. I know what this is all about. And you know too. Just act and don't think for once. She might just be worth it, you know? Now go, wine is supposed to be drunk slightly cold."

* * *

"So... You like her."

Callie was sitting on the sofa with Tim. He offered to make her company while Arizona went to solve some problems with one of her editors. Yes, at almost 10pm Arizona was still somehow working. Having a glimpse of her life like this, Callie was sure the blonde worked probably as much or more than herself. The only difference being that Arizona slept at home at nights. But just like Callie's job, she could be disturbed from whatever other personal stuff she was doing to deal with work related matters that needed her attention, at any hour of any day.

Tim and Callie had been making small talk for a little while, just getting to know a little bit about each other, one or other comment about the wedding being thrown out there in the conversation. Arizona's parents went home a while ago and Tim's fiancé went in a little trip to the toilet. Callie's eyes were now fixated where Arizona was standing, phone on her year, the other hand on her hip. Her body was resting on one of the glass walls of the building, looking at the city out there.

"What?" The brunette averted her eyes from Arizona to look at Tim, a look of surprise on her face. She hated being so obvious. A few hours around Arizona's brother and he could already read into her growing feelings for the blonde.

"You like Arizona." It wasn't a question.

She involuntarily looked back at Arizona. "Of course. She's a great friend." Deep down Callie knew Tim wouldn't buy what she just said. True enough, a small laugh coming from him hit her ears.

"You are just as blind as her. My God."

"I know what you meant, Tim." Talking to Tim like this was as weird as it was actually comforting.

"I know. I meant you are dumb, in a sense of not doing what you guys both know you want to."

It was so simple for the outsiders, wasn't it? She wanted it to be that simple for her too. The worst thing about this was that she actually didn't know why it was like that. Maybe she was forever damaged from her previous relationships. Maybe she had just become a coward. Maybe it wasn't actually meant to be. She liked Arizona. She beyond liked her. The blonde had become that constant in her life that was there every day bringing little portions of joy. She had held onto those small moments in which they would talk on the phone or joke through text because Arizona was just… beautiful. Not only in a physical way.

"Should we really be having this conversation?"

"We should. Normally a brother would come and tell 'you hurt my sister and I hurt you'. You should appreciate the fact that I'm the completely opposite here. At least in what comes to you."

"You just met me." Callie laughed.

"That's what you're wrong about." Confusion on her face, he resumed speaking. "She talks about you all the time, Callie. I probably know about your research and your beauty and your taste in basically anything as much as she does." Callie's heart was starting to pick up its pace, by now. She never thought a conversation like this would be happening tonight. "She really likes you. She just..."

"It's complicated, Tim." Callie shook her head one side to another.

"I know it is. I just don't understand why. You are single, she is single. Both have jobs and are independent women. Both beautiful and attractive. Both pretty much smitten by the other."

"Tim..."

"I'm nosy. In general. But even more when it comes to my sister because she is probably the person I love the most in the whole world."

"What do you want me to say, Tim? She is... amazing. She is... Her. But I'm new in this. My last girlfriend left me out of nowhere and I have no idea where I went wrong. And I'm really afraid I'll screw this up. Whatever it is." It probably had to do with the fact that Arizona never really gave any strong indication about her feelings for Callie. She was afraid to go out there again, in an inappropriate time, and be faced with the cruel truth of Arizona not liking her in a romantic way. Or maybe not as much as Callie liked her. The gorgeous woman was as mysterious as they come and kind of unpredictable. She knew that whatever was inside Arizona, it could only be good. But at the same time, she didn't want to dive into the dark only to discover that that beautiful warm water wasn't for her body to swim in.

"Arizona… She has the biggest heart." Tim changed position on the couch, his elbows resting on his knees and his hands locked while he looked affectionately at his sister. "The most political correct opinions and an admirable sense of justice. She has always had a difficult time loving, though. She always had to fight too much for all she wanted just because she is a girl. And she is completely terrified of losing control of her life. The control she fights for since she was a little girl and yelled at our father that it wasn't fair that she couldn't go out and play in the dirty like I used to do. And the time when she was 7 and our aunt told her to close her legs because she was wearing a skirt and little cute Arizona told her she would close her legs if she closed her mouth." Tim laughed, followed by Callie, to which sound Arizona twisted her head in their direction and smiled back. She couldn't hear what they were talking about, though. As she turned her attention back to her phone, Tim concluded putting his thoughts into words.

"She is afraid of losing control. And control can't be applied in that way when it comes to love, because the heart interferes. So, she refrains herself from feeling it. She has become a closed person everyday more. She doesn't want to admit it, but she does need love. As independent as she may be." Everyone needed it, Callie thought. She liked to think she was a strong enough person to not need someone by her side to make her feel happy. But she would be lying. Not because she thought it was completely impossible, but because for her, it would never be like that. She just… She liked the companion, the waking up entangled in someone else's warmth, the kisses before going to sleep, the heated discussions about important matters, the make up sex, the showers together, the intimacy… She had to take a deep breath, because she couldn't let herself imagine all of those things with Arizona quite yet.

"Why are you telling me all of this, Tim?"

"Because Arizona never really runs away of relationships. I think it is because in the ones she had, she knew from day one they wouldn't become something more. And with you… Well, do you really think a woman like Arizona wouldn't score one when she knows she can?

"What?"

"I'm not trying to insult you. That came out wrong. What I meant was… She likes you, probably a lot more than she has ever liked anyone. And I know the reason she never really acted is because she is afraid of what a relationship with real feelings would do to her and her control over her life."

"I would never try to control her life." It all made sense, what Tim was saying. She could see Arizona had a built up personality that wasn't entirely her, because sometimes, when she thought the blonde was finally letting herself relax and act carefree and her walls were starting to crumble just a bit, she would suddenly come back to her old self, as if she had just noticed what she was doing. It could only be very exhaustive to live like that. But she wouldn't ever do anything like trying to control Arizona's life, because she hated when people tried to control herself.

"It's not about that. It's about what she would come to feel for you making her lose control. It's not about what you do. It's about what she would do under the influence of what she would come to feel for you."

Callie looked deeply at Tim's eyes. He had something really captivating about him, just like his sister had. He carried this sense of protection and honor and trust in his figure. It made her feel good and bad all at once. She was glad that Arizona grew up with someone like him beside her. And she was sad that she never really had her own Tim. True, she had Mark now. And she had Addison growing up. But she could see that the Robbins siblings' relationship was in a whole another level.

"I know you like her, Callie. It's all over your face. What I'm trying to do here, as the good brother I am, is to ask you to have a little patience. I can guarantee you she is worth it."

Tim gave her a squeeze on her shoulder and a smile. He stood from the couch and walked out to where her sister was. She saw him take the phone from her ear and say something, clicking buttons to what could only be ending the call, by the shocked and then pissed off expression in Arizona's face. She giggled to herself. She imagine not many people would do that to Arizona and not be sent to death sentence. The blonde said what Callie was sure were not so nice things to him and walked out.

* * *

Everyone had went home except for Tim and Emily. Her brother's fiancé had drunk a bit too much and he was trying to wake her up on the couch. He was laughing while trying to put her in a standing position. It was in fact, funny. In Callie's company near the elevator's door she admired the brunette's face while she watched the scene a few feet away unfold. Tim was now holding his fiancé in his arms. He came walking in their direction and Arizona pressed the button for them to get in, waving him good bye and receiving a wink back. "Good luck with opening the car's door", she said to him when the doors started to close. She and Callie laughed when they saw his desperate face. He clearly had not thought about that.

"I'm really glad you came, Callie." Turning her attention back to the brunette, Arizona felt the strong need to touch her come back, enhanced by the fact they were completely alone now. It was so hard not to do it.

"I'm happy to have come. I really liked getting to meet everyone in your life. Everyone is so nice. And they like you, their boss. That says something about the person you are. Not that I needed that to know you are special." Callie brought her hand to slightly caress Arizona's arm, almost till the length of her wrist. The hair in her fair skin shivering in sequence like a trail behind the delicate touch. In an impulsive gesture, Arizona grabbed her hand.

"Thank you. I… Hm… You saying that means a lot." They locked eyes for a minute before Callie gave her a small sad smile.

"You're welcome. Well, I should get going. Early day tomorrow." The brunette squeezed her hand but didn't free it from their hold.

"Yeah. Okay. Text me at some point when you have time?" Arizona said, her last words sounding more like a plea.

"Absolutely." Callie pulled her by the hand still intertwined with hers and brought her lips to whisper in her ear. "Congratulations, beautiful…"

Arizona gasped and her eyes instantly closed shut when she felt Callie's lips deposit a kiss just below her earlobe. Her hand and her body then felt cold as their moment ended. Her eyes opened to see Callie pushing the elevator button. They said nothing for a few seconds, Arizona still under the strong effect of a simple kiss. The door opened and Callie got inside, smiling at Arizona one last time that night.

As the doors were about to close, Arizona gave a step forward and with a hand prevented them to do so.

"Callie?"

"Yeah?"

"To answer your question from earlier. Yes, you do." She then pulled her hand back and pressed the button so the doors would close faster. She had no idea if Callie would remember what her question in the beginning of the night was. She could only hope.

 _"_ _I just came across a manger_

 _Where there is no danger_

 _Where love has eyes and is not blind…"_

 _(I don't want to change you - Damien Rice)_

* * *

 **A/N:** It's been 84 years. ***insert meme here*** WOW, three months later again. All I can do is keep apologizing and keep thanking whoever is still with me. Seriously, thank you so much. Do you guys remember which question Arizona was referring to? I think we kind of have a little bit of an insight as to why our ladies are resisting each other so much. Let me know what you think. What did you guys think about last night's episode? It was only me who hated what they are doing with Arizona's story line? Not just now. It's since season 9, really. But I'm really disappointed with it all. I really liked Eliza and now she is gone. But that's not the point. The point is how they are writing Arizona. She looks like someone who doesn't care about anything anymore. And I didn't like Carina at first, but then I watched the scenes again and she is okay, actually. The problem is not her either. I think I just wanted to have the writers do Arizona some justice and write her some real scenes with content and intensity. Something that would explore her character and her medical skills more. Anyways… Really really hope you enjoy this chapter. You will get to see our girls together in about 4 chapters or so. What do you think will happen next? And oh, all mistakes are totally mine. Sorry, I know you guys have found a lot of it. But well... I work with what I have.


	10. Chapter 10: Tried and failed resisting

**Chapter 10: Tried and failed to resist**

" _Can you hear my heart beating_

 _Can you hear that sound_

 _Cuz I can't help thinking_

 _And I won't stop now."_

Late afternoon had come this busy thursday. How much time could one go without a meal was Arizona's body questioning today. She had a muffin at 10am and that was it. She was trying to get everything ahead of schedule so she could take the day before and the day after Tim's birthday off. That would be some really needed break, even if only for a couple of days. As if on cue, a light knock sounded on her office door and her brother's blonde head peeked from behind it.

"Hey, little sis" Tim said with a small smile, opening the door completely and walking in.

"Tim! What are you doing here?" Not that she was not pleased with the visit. She just didn't expect the it.

"I need your opinion on something", the tall man shrugged as he came closer to her desk and handed her a piece of paper.

"Now?", she questioned, receiving the paper and giving him a pleading look.

"Yep. It's important." He sat on the chair in front of her and stared, waiting for her to read the paper.

"What's it?"

"My vows. I need you to take a look at it." He saw her face instantly change from terribly tired to sympathetic tired.

"Awn, Tim. You've already written it." Arizona was honored. An intense sense of pride overtaking her. Her big brother was getting married. And bringing his vows to have her opinion on it. She loved that she could be a part of this and really appreciated being included.

"I wrote it when I was still deployed, Zona. I... Writing it was what made me get through the last months. I wrote it an uncountable number of times."

There was not much to say after that. She could only imagine what her brother went through all those years serving the country. The pain and the reality of not being able to sleep in complete peace, of missing the one you love, of being constantly scared for the life of others and for your own life. She could imagine Tim using writing his vows as a way of creating, for a few minutes, a world he, at that moment, could only dream about. It was a safe place for him, a safe place inside his own mind. A place he didn't really need paper and a pen to take him there. A place which accompanied him wherever he went. At least as long as he was conscious.

She took on every world in the vows, a few tears collecting in her eyes, just about to fall. It was beautiful and raw. Emotional but completely truthful. Maybe even a little dark, but enchanting nonetheless. "Shall the light of the universe shine inside your eyes forever, I'd never be able to look anywhere else. Shall the darkness of the void occupy it, I'd forever try to fire it back to life."

"It's beautiful, Tim. She will love it. I'm sure no one will be able to hold their tears." Arizona laughed through her own unshed ones. "I'm proud of you, Tim. And happy for you. You, more than anyone, deserve to be happy."

"You deserve to be happy too, Arizona." Didn't everyone deserve to be happy? To deserve is not the same to reach it. But she? She was happy. She could not ever say she had a bad life. This life she had, it was all she had ever dreamed of. But she knew what kind of happiness Tim was talking about and to be honest, she didn't want to talk about it. Not now, anyway.

"I am. I am happy", Arizona smiled at him, handing him back the paper with the vows.

"Arizona...", he tried to reason.

"I am, Tim. I... I have all of this. And it is all I ever wanted."

"And now that you have all of it, do you think this is all you need?" It was definitely a valid question. It truly was all that she always wanted. Growing up she never really dreamed to find the girl of her dreams and get married and have three kids, a dog and a house with a big yard and a pool. Not that she didn't like the idea of it. She just had what she thought were some bigger dreams. Everyone ended up married with kids, right? So, at some point, that would eventually happen for her too. But to build a company, to be able to reach people all around the world, to spread a positive message? Not everyone really achieved that. And that was what always had driven her in life.

"Tim..."

"Arizona, when will be the time for us to talk about it?" The truth was that Tim was concerned. He had been back for almost two months and had seen his sister only every other week. He had called her several times only to listen to her say that she was very busy. She was somehow withdrawn and didn't talk to him like before. She almost never got out of the office and when she did, she spent her time alone at home. She had only deliberately called him twice all of these weeks. Her face was lacking any kind of enthusiasm. And that was not his little sister. He knew it had much more to do with how much she had been working than with the fact that she didn't have someone by her side. But he knew too that Arizona, as any human being, needed the security of a human soul embracing her. It had been almost two years since she was with anyone, and we are not talking about sex, we are talking about the company and comfort.

"About what, exactly?

"About the fact that you are turning into some kind of prisoner in your own castle. The walls around you are like a fort. No one goes through it. No matter how hard they try." So maybe now was the time to address it. It was as good of a time as any other.

"I don't wanna talk about this, Tim." God, she didn't need this right now. Didn't anyone understand? She was a busy woman who would never be really able to give other woman what she deserved. She didn't have time, she probably wasn't sensitive enough or maybe she was just incapable of truly loving someone. And it wouldn't be fair to anyone to be in a relationship in which your partner can't give themselves completely to you. Arizona just couldn't let go of who she was to be with someone. And who she was was not enough.

"Why, Arizona?"

"Tim..."

"When, then?" He insisted, trying his lucky. His sister would most probably tell him to fuck off at any minute.

"Tim..."

"What happened to you? Really! You are not..." He tried for the last time, and there it was, Arizona not so patiently interrupting him.

"What I am, Tim, is an independent woman. I'm where I want to be. I don't need anyone to make me happy. I make myself happy." Even Arizona knew that wasn't entirely true, but this discussion needed to be over.

"Can you look at me and say you are truly happy?

"I am." She said as she looked directly in his eyes, but knowing well enough that it wouldn't convince him.

"You wake up everyday, look at the other side of your bed..."

"I sleep in the middle."

"And think "I'm so happy that I'm alone and cold in this big house".

"I live in LA, it's almost always hot and, when it's not, my house has a heating system."

"Without someone to make you feel loved while having sex."

"Timothy", she exasperatly said. He was her brother and most probably the person she loved the most in the world, but he was beyond the boundaries.

"This here is amazing, Arizona. And I'm proud of you and happy for you for having this. You deserve it. But you deserve more than this. And you..."

"Enough! This is my life, Tim. Not yours. You made your choices. And you hurt people in the process but you still did it. And I don't condone you for that. I made my own choices too. Deal with it and support me."

"I do support you, Arizona. And I'll be by your side no matter what. Now, I did come here so you could read my vows, but I also brought this for you." From inside his pocket, Tim took an envelope and put it on his sister's desk, standing in front of her. "You are too afraid of losing control. And that is what you think having a loving relationship will do to you."

"You think you know me too well, even when you've been almost a decade away. You know nothing about me anymore, Tim", she said in her raised defensive voice, a voice which would scare anyone who crossed her path, but not Tim.

"You are just trying to hurt me there, sister. It won't work." He calmly stated. "I do know you. More than anyone. As you know me. Because we are Tim and Zona." He smiled her way, watching her face soften.

"Can we just not talk about it?" Arizona sighed. She needed some peace and tranquility and maybe 12 more hours in her days. "I have too much on my plate. Your wedding is in 10 days and I have two important campaigns to finish before then... So, please." There was no point discussing this right now. Why was him forcing her to do this?

"Okay. Just take the envelope and address it to the right person, okay?" She knew the envelope was a small version of his wedding invitation. But who should she…

"Tim…", she took a deep breath and massaged her temple when she saw the same written in the back of the envelope.

"If you chicken up you can just say that it was me who sent it for her." They looked at each other for a few seconds. Arizona seemed so unsure. He understood her. He did. And while he was away he couldn't do anything to try and help her through this. But he was here now and he would most definitely try. His little sister was an amazing woman. One of the most amazing women out there, he knew that for sure. And she deserved to be free of her own insecurities.

"She seems like a really nice woman, Arizona. And we both know that you wanna do it." With that, he left her to ponder.

* * *

"I can't believe it." The blonde heart surgeon complained after getting on the scale in one of the hospitals hallways.

"What?"

"I lost two pounds." With a huff, she got off of the offending object and looked at Callie. It was midday and she had just went for a "little walk" at the ortho ward, on a "consult". Teddy approached Callie, who was just finishing writing something on one of her charts.

"And you're complaining because? Isn't it every woman's dream to lose weight? Like, aren't you all obsessed about it?" Closing the chart and handing it to nurse Ana, she looked at Teddy with an incredulous expression.

"Have you seen me?" Teddy pointed to herself. "I mean, I'm hot. But I'm already too skinny. I can't lose weight. It's this damn job. Cristina will end up killing me."

"Cristina or Owen?" Brows raised, Callie was holding a smirk. "What? You think I don't have eyes?"

"Oh, shut up." Teddy rolled her eyes. This was not where she wanted this conversation to go. "Wanna have lunch?" She watched Callie smile and nod her head, walking to the elevator. "Anyways, how much does you weight?"

"What?" Teddy was weird today, the brunette thought.

"Yeah, I want to know, so I can have a goal or something." As they entered the elevator, Mark quickly followed behind.

"Hey, ladies." He winked, looking at them both completely ignoring him.

Callie pressed the floor button and turned her attention back to Teddy. "You want my body as inspiration? You're funny."

"Your body is awesome." Mark intruded, seeing two pairs of eyes roll. "What? It is." He watched them ignoring him again.

"Well, it is, Callie. I bet everyone you date is all touchy feely on you."

"Oh, I was." Everyone knows who said that, huh?

"Shut up, Mark." They both said in unison.

"Men like curves. You have curves. And I'm all touchy feely with every woman." No, Mark never had any limits and we know that. But so what? He was in the elevator with them, was he supposed to just ignore the conversation? Yes, is the answer. If it was any other person but Mark.

"So…" Teddy asked, ignoring Mark once more.

"I won't tell you how much I weight." Callie said at the same time the elevator's doors opened and they started walking towards the hospital cafeteria.

"But what is your size?" Teddy never thought getting those informations would be so hard.

"I'm not answering that either." Callie laughed embarrassed. She liked her body, yes. But somehow, sometimes, letting people know her weight and her clothes sizes made her uncomfortable. It was just one more of her insecurities, the actual numbers.

"For shirts or jeans?" Mark's intrusive voice came from behind them. Teddy didn't actually like Mark. She felt like he didn't have much to offer. She might be wrong in this case, maybe?

"Mark." Callie adverted. Yeah, Mark knew her body. A little too much, she came to regret.

"Well, jeans." Teddy said, turning her attention to the man.

"12 or 14, it depends."

"Dresses?" Teddy asked while they entered the cafeteria and walked to the balcony to get some food, followed by her two acquaintances.

"8, she's an 8 for dresses."

"Shoes?"

"8.5"

"What the hell does shoes' size have to do with gaining or losing weight? And you, Mark, just stop. It's creepy." What the hell was happening, here? Teddy and Mark sharing cards about her clothes AND shoes sizes while she was standing right there. All of that in the middle of the cafeteria.

"Oh, I know your bra size too", Mark declared, pointing to her chest area with a smirk on his face. "It's a C…"

"SHUT UP!" Because enough was enough. Callie didn't count on everyone looking at her for raising her voice. "You, guys… Seriously! What are you, 7?" She whispered.

Mark lowered his upper body in the brunette direction and loudly whispered too. "If I was 7, I would not know your bra size, Cal." To what Teddy laughed, followed by himself. Callie just looked at them with an incredulous face, raising her hand indignantly and walking away, lunch completely forgotten. She would eat later, when the children in this hospital went to play somewhere else.

"What was that about?" Mark asked, watching Callie walk in the distance, turning right in one of the corridors.

"Can't tell yet! Will you be home this afternoon?" Since Mark had unconsciously helped just now, maybe he could consciously help later?

"I get out at 5pm. Why? Do you want me to get to know your body and your clothes' size too?" He asked, wiggling his eyebrows at her.

"Oh, my God, no." She and Mark in bed together? She, Teddy Altman, cardio god, killer body, with Sir McSteamy in bed? Actually that was a beautiful image. But ugh, no. Unless Mark could be completely silent for the entirety of it. Anyways… "But I'll need your help with something."

"This has to do with blondie, doesn't it?" Oh, it totally did. And he was in. Callie needed some action going on down there. He didn't care blondie had been a total bitch to him the first, and last, time they saw each other at Joe's bar. He had been a pig, so…

"Can't tell yet. Wait for a call from me."

* * *

10pm. Callie should have been heading home three hours ago. Two long emergency surgeries left her completely exhausted. Good thing she had tomorrow off. Getting her keys from her purse, she unlocked her apartment door and walked in. Sighing in relief, she put the keys on the table close to the entrance and her purse on the couch. She looked at the kitchen and pondered fixing herself a quick late night snack. The last time she ate was around five in the afternoon, an apple and a cookie.

Rummaging through her fridge, she found some pasta primavera leftover from two days ago. How pathetic was her life? She laughed to herself while putting the pasta in the microwave. She set the time for 3 minutes and went to take off her clothes. She needed to undress and have a shower. But that would be after eating, because now that she had seen food, her stomach was starting to complain. Pulling her shirt out through her head, she entered the bedroom and stopped as soon as she saw something on her bed, shirt still around her arms.

She suspiciously walked closer to the bed and took in the view. There were three white boxes, rectangular shaped, in different sizes, piled up. Each had a bow in a different color. The smaller one on the top of the pile had a yellow bow, an envelope attached to it. Disentangling the shirt from her arms, she threw the piece of clothing on a nearby armchair and grabbed the small envelope. As she looked intently to the writing, her heart instantly picked up its pace. She knew that handwriting. She smiled to herself and traced her name written in bright gold over the black paper.

With slightly shaky hands, Callie opened the envelope. She took a moment to look at the handwriting before reading. _"Calliope, I should be doing this in person, but not my job and not my lack of courage allowed me to. By phone didn't seem right either. I have to ask you something, which I hope the answer for is positive. Open the smaller while box."_

Callie was nervous. She had no idea what this was about. She surely knew who this was from and that was enough to make her hesitate for a second. The sound of the microwave coming from the kitchen startled her. 'Okay, open the box, Callie. It's not like a giant spider will get out of there.' She put the envelope aside and undid the yellow bow tie. There was a small paper simply saying " _Will you be my date for Tim's wedding?"_ and what she assumed was Tim's wedding invitation in a fancy grey paper with gold lettering. She opened the invitation and inside there was another small paper. " _If the possibility of a yes is crossing your mind, don't think too much further and open the box with the blue bow_."

'Arizona!' That was all she could think right now. Her name and her face, and how she made Callie feel just with her invitations through handwritten cards in boxes.

Box with blue bow open, she was faced with the most beautiful pair of louboutin shoes she had ever seen. It that red sole, heels completely covered in crystals and transparent mesh with some other small crystals at the front. She was in complete shock. She wasn't expecting that at all. Her fogged brain noticed another small card in the bottom of the box. Reluctantly putting the shoes aside, she read Arizona's next words. _"To go with these, you should look at what is inside the big box."_

The content of the big box was a beautiful long red dress, with only one shoulder and a big crevice on the left leg. Another card accompanied it. _"When you have decided, read the card attsched to the flowers. Doesn't matter what is the answer."_

Flowers? Her head instantly darted around, looking for it. It was when she noticed that the fake flowers she had on top of her dresser were replaced by beautiful Cala Lilies. _"I really expect to make the day more special with you by my side. The big day is nine days from now, at 6pm. I hope the flowers are a good way to apologize for not coming to you directly. Let me know what you decide. Fondly, Arizona."_

She hoped the flowers were a good way to apologize? The flowers? Only Arizona would send someone a pair of louboutins and a dress to invite for a wedding and think that the flowers were the apologie for not doing it in person. Callie touched the white flowers and smiled. If this was what it was like to be asked on a date by Arizona, what would it be to actually be her girlfriend? 'Okay, let's not get ahead of ourselves. What do I do?' The brunette didn't know what to think, much less what to say to Arizona. Nothing besides 'yes', because after all of this, nothing she said or did would be enough.

* * *

"You think it was too much, Teddy? I don't want her to think I'm trying to buy her company by giving her things. I just thought it would be a nice thing to do because it's short notice and she is a busy woman. Not that I'm not busy, because you know I am and if you think like that, if I had time to do it, she would have too. But well, Barbara helped me, she went to the stores and sent me pictures of all the dresses and shoes. All I had to do was write the cards. And…"

"Arizona…", Teddy interrupted. "You did the right thing. Tim is right, you know?" Teddy had come to Arizona's house tonight to talk. Her friend had been surprisingly nervous. Arizona was very rarely nervous with anything. She was a confident woman.

"I know." Arizona took a deep breath and sipped on her wine. They were seated at her living room couch for the last hour talking about what Arizona had done and what 'Teddy' had done. "I just don't think this is a good time, Teddy. That's all." She put her glass on the coffee table and brought her hands to her face, massaging it for a few seconds, pondering her little moment of courage today and nervous about Callie's response, which hadn't come yet, at 11pm.

"And you were planning on making her wait for your work to be a little less hectic and you become a little braver? You know that the first will probably never happen and the second… Well, the only difference between you growing some balls now or in a few months is that if you do it now, you can have her sooner."

"I hate that expression."

"Grow balls?" Teddy inquired.

"Yes. I don't need balls to be brave. It's sexist. The only balls I need to have and I'm interest in are boobs." Arizona declared, making Teddy laugh.

"Yeah, man's balls aren't really interesting, with all that hair around, I have to agree." They both laughed.

Arizona's phone chimed in on her lap, indicating a new message. She looked down and her whole body instantly got a cold wave travelling around and settling in her stomach.

" _ **Yes"**_ _,_ the text simple said. It was Callie's number. And as simple as the text was, she was surprisingly satisfied with it.

"Is that her? What did she say?" Teddy asked as she saw her friends face looking at the phone.

"She only answered 'yes'.", she answered, not really looking at Teddy and typing a message back.

" **Really?"** Teddy came to sit closer, looking at the cellphone's screen to see their interaction.

" _ **Yes. I would love to be your date. I loved the dress and the shoes. You didn't have to do that.**_ _"_

" **I wanted to. It was short noticed and I thought it would only be fair. You don't have to use it, though. If you don't like it."**

" _ **Thank you, Arizona. The dress and shoes are gorgeous. And thank you for the flowers. They are beautiful. Apologizing was not needed either, you know?"**_

" **It was. You deserve that someone takes the time to ask you out properly."**

" _ **Well, not doing it personally definitely has its disadvantages. And not just for me."**_ Both she and Teddy were completely silent during their exchange and right now neither of them knew what exactly what to think about Callie's last text message. But another soon followed. _**"Arizona, I… like you. And this is not about the dress nor the shoes, nor the flowers. It's just… you."**_ Her eyes went wide and she stopped breathing. She looked at Teddy, who was wearing basically the same expression as herself. The sound of a new text brought them out of their shock. _"_ _ **I shouldn't have said this in text. I'm sorry. Now I'm owing you flowers to apologize too."**_

" **No. Don't be sorry. Just come with me to the wedding."**

" _ **Promise. Good night, Arizona."**_

" **Good night, Calliope."**

"Why didn't you say it back?" Teddy questioned looking at her as if she was the dumbest human being on earth.

"Because I already invited her through notes and cards. She deserves to know how I feel from my mouth."

" _And then I looked up at the sun_

 _And I could see_

 _Oh, the way that gravity pulls_

 _On you and me…"_

 _(Gravity – Coldplay)_

* * *

AN: Hi, guys. This is the longest it took me to update and I am really sorry. I hope I can deliver updates more frequently. Besides all of the stuff I have been dealing with, I have lacked motivation in the last few months. This chapter was really hard to write and that is just one more reason why it took me so long to write it. I just didn't know how to write it the right way. I think it was okay at the end. I really really hope you enjoy it. Please, let me know what you think of it. Also, this is the last time we will see Tim meddling anything between Callie and Arizona for a long time. There is a limit for familiar interference in all of the aspects of our lives. And I think what Tim did was just the exact perfect way to do it. Was it any other story, the family member would invite someone without the other person knowing and putting them in an awkward situation and I don't think that is a nice thing to do. So Tim showed her what she should do but gave her the power of choice. I think that is just the right kind and amount of interference. What do you think will happen next chapter?


	11. Chapter 11: Wedding miracles

**Chapter 11: Wedding miracles**

" _Well, I, I've got a lot to say_

 _And I'm scared that you're gonna slip away_

 _And you, you've got this wide eyed gaze_

 _And a smile that you'll carry through your days…"_

The ceremony was over and her big brother and Emma were now officially husband and wife. With not even one minute of belatedness, her sister in law met Tim at the altar by the end of the afternoon, the sunshine rays starting to become less bright in summer LA. A full church of emotional adults and dreamy youngers witnessed the matrimony wiping their faces from the silent tears during the groom and bride vows. By 7:30, everyone was at the venue where the party would be held, including the newlyweds. And Arizona, apprehensively accompanied by Callie.

The day had started like any other day in the blonde's life, except there was a constant feeling of anxiety in the pit of her stomach. Of course, it was her brother's wedding and that would always cause some turmoil in her mental state. But she would be too ingenuous to try and fool herself about it being the real reason. No. The reason was a certain latina she would have today as her company and the words she was supposed to declare today.

When 4pm came around, Arizona was sat in a hair saloon, totally oblivious to anything happening outside of her mind. Seeing herself in the mirror as the lady finished her hair was so much of a surprise as if she had been with her eyes covered the whole time. That bothered her. The fact that a simple interaction with a woman would make her so unfocused. It proved her point about why she should restrain herself of going further with whatever it was she felt for Callie. But, truth be told, she was also bothered by the fact that for years she had been living trying to control everything she felt. It was exhausting. And with Callie it had become harder and more tiring. It was heavy and overwhelming. And for the better or for the worst she had to try and make that stop. Starting today.

So, she had given a long look at herself in the mirror. With a small smile of approval on her face she went to get dressed. Callie had strongly refused to accept that Arizona sent her driver to collect the brunette from her apartment and bring her to the wedding. It would not be possible for Arizona to do so herself, as she was maid of honor and had to be at the church earlier.

For that fact, Arizona spent the whole ceremony away from her estranged companion, who sat a few benches away, wearing the beautiful red dress and her amazing smile every time their eyes crossed upon each other. It was as comforting as it was unsettling.

As soon as everyone got out of the church, Arizona was face to face with the object of her affection. The force of her beauty hitting her directly in her chest. Callie was… beyond beautiful. She took the olive hand on hers and said nothing, guiding the woman to the car which would take them to the wedding celebration's venue. And back to the present, here they were, after 20 min of walking around and small talking.

They had just stopped in a small area, a bit far from the noisy crowd. It was a little garden, with bushes at the height of their waist, overlooking the wide ocean. The summer sun was starting to set, coloring the sky with light pink and purple and a bit of dark blue. In maybe 10 more minutes, all darkness would cover the horizon and the party would officially start.

Arizona thought that this was just the right moment, even if the outcome of what she had to do was bad and ended up ruining the rest of the night for her. To keep waiting for a better moment under the weight of this angst feeling was not an option right now.

By her side, Callie looked around, admiring the sand and water and the dance of colors. It was probably something the brunette was used to experiencing while growing up in Miami, Arizona thought. And if nothing else about to happen tonight would appease the latina, maybe the comfort of something beautiful and familiar would.

"This is really beautiful", Callie declared, diverting her eyes back to Arizona, and interrupting her process of collecting courage. "And they look so happy."

"They are. They both waited a long time for this day." Callie knew the couple's history and she was apparently aware of what she was witnessing today. It was a big event, not in the physical aspect of it, but the emotional one.

"I can only imagine", the brunette said with a small and a little sad smile, for whatever reason Arizona didn't quite understand, but enough for her to try and remedy it.

"You know what else is beautiful?"

"What?"

"You. You look really really beautiful, Callie." It was something no one could deny and everyone had noticed since Callie entered the room. Arizona could see it by the amount of heads turning and eyes bulging. Her entire family was made of blue eyed, fair skinned people who would burn under the heat of mild sun. Emily's family was not much different. And yes, there were a lot of other people which would not fit that description attending the wedding, but none had quite an exquisite figure. And so, Callie was, not for the dress, not for the shoes, not for the hair and makeup, the most beautiful woman in this place today, if Arizona could point that out.

Arizona watched Callie's cheeks get a darker shade of pink and her mouth release a timid laugh before saying, "Well, I think I have you to thank for that". How wrong was she?

"No. It's definitely not the dress that is making you look good." Arizona hated, hated these initial interactions in which there was not enough amount of easiness and comfort between two people to be able to say things like that and not be slightly bothered by its implications. It was what she wanted to say, of course, but the way she was feeling apprehensive and the way she saw Callie blushing even harder was a bit unsettling for her.

"Thank you. And now it will look like I'm saying this because you said it first, but you look really pretty too."

"Thank you", the blonde simply said, not really knowing what to add to the sentence. Maybe it was time to cut right to the point. "Callie... I... Hmm. I wanted to talk to you about something. I..." Arizona looked to the ocean for a bit diverting from Callie's deep eyes. "How can I say this?", she nervously laughed. "Okay. Well, Tim was the one who told me to invite you", she finally started after looking back to Callie. The other woman's face was a mix of confusion and surprise and what could only be named as disappointment. That was everything Arizona didn't want her to feel.

"What?"

"No. Don't jump into wrong conclusions, okay? Let me finish." Arizona calmly declared. Taking a deep breath she tried to collect the exact words that could change the way Callie was looking at her. And, most important, the way she was probably feeling. "I thought I should tell you this because I want to be honest with you. He came to my office and put the envelope on my desk and said something along the lines of 'do it, I know you want to'." The blonde smiled at the memory and at how intrusively right her brother was. "And he was right. I want you here with me… You have been making me feel things. New things. Good things." She looked at her own feet for a second, sighing, and took a step closer. She was now looking directly in the brunettes eyes. "But, Callie, it is hard for me to get romantically involved with someone. I've always had a difficult time loving. And I am a hard person to love. I'm workaholic, I'm hot headed, I'm very stubborn. I'm a bit boring, too. And I'm..."

"Arizona...", Callie interrupted. Arizona was afraid. Afraid of Callie interpreting what she was saying the wrong way, of making her think she was being rejected. And, at the same time, she was afraid of being rejected herself. Because what she was about to offer Callie was not much. It was not enough. It was almost nothing. But it was all she could compromise offering right now. But despite all of that, she had to put it all out of her chest.

"No. Just listen. Please?" Her tremulous hand came to hold Callie's warm one. Brown eyes looked intensely at their spontaneously intertwined fingers. Not a new act between them, but definitely a new feeling as result. "The time I'm at right now, Callie, in life... It would make it all even worse. And what I'm trying to say is that I like you." Squeezing the olive hand at the end of the sentence, she watched Callie look directly at her again, her face completely blank. "But whatever is this we have going on… I can't really promise you much and it wouldn't be fair, to you. I have to be honest about it, because I like you, Callie." At the woman's confused expression, Arizona knew she was failing this terribly.

"What does that mean?" 'What does it mean, Arizona?' She asked herself, in an internal dialog with her own being. The little angel and the little devil strongly fighting. 'Can't you just use a little bit of your heart instead of your head for once? Just once, Arizona.'

"It means that I want you here with me. I want you by my side in many occasions. I think of you constantly. But I don't want to hurt you when I spend weeks buried into work and don't have time to call you and talk for more than 5 min. I don't want to hurt you when I need to decline one of your invitations to have a drink or dinner. Or when I suddenly go into a bad mood because of work and end up saying something hurtful to you. And when I have my moments and insecurities, that may hurt you too because I'll probably push you away. If I act impulsively with you, eventually and unconsciously I will hurt you. And I can't have that happening. I want to be with you but I can't do that if doing it will hurt you by tomorrow." There, there it was. The whole truth about it all. Or at least a big part of the truth. The fact that Arizona actually really liked someone and the cruel reality that she was not able to give that someone what she needed or deserved. The fact that she couldn't give _'herself'_ what she deserved, for whatever fucked up reason.

Callie pulled Arizona a little closer by the hand holding hers, her free hand coming to rest over the fair cheek and her thumb going back and forth in a caress, to which Arizona closed her eyes for just a second.

"You are being honest. You've already done more than anyone I've been with before, Arizona. And as long as you are honest, there is not much I could ask from you. This, whatever it is, doesn't have to go wrong before it even starts. Okay?" Callie asked, to what Arizona was only capable of nodding. "I want to be with you too. But this is new. And we definitely won't be moving in together tomorrow. So, for now, 5 minutes phone calls each day 'is' enough. If you can only meet me once a week, that is fine too. Your life doesn't have to completely evolve around me, Arizona. I don't want that. And I can't have my life running in circles around anyone anymore, either. If you don't like me enough to try to do this, I want you to tell me the truth and I'll understand. I promise I will. But if you do... "

"I do…" Arizona answered without hesitation, what made Callie smile. They were so close and Callie smelled so good. She was almost hypnotized.

"Then we'll try. And the only thing I ask from you is that you continue to be honest, alright?"

"Alright." Arizona's voice came in a whisper. Her body was starting to feel heavy, her chest seemed tight and her head was in a bit of a daze. 'The effect of this woman, my God!'

"Can I finally kiss you?" Callie cheekily asked. "Because it is the only way I can pay you back for this dress and these shoes and the invitation and your honesty."

The small amount of joke was enough to bring Arizona back into reality. "Stop. Don't be stupid." She smiled. "You don't need to pay for anything?" She had barely finished speaking as she felt a pair of lips over hers. Her eyes instantly shut, a deep intake of breath forced its way through her nose as she collected the air she needed to actually reciprocate. It was not a forced kiss, nor aggressive or demanding. In fact, Callie's mouth was gentle, applying just the right amount of pressure. And as she finally moved her own mouth, she felt Callie's plump lips capture her bottom one, slightly sucking for a second. She held in a moan as Callie ended the kiss with a delicate peck. Arizona's stomach was tense and her skin had all kinds of shivers. With her eyes still closed and a small smile on her face, she heard Callie ask.

"No? Are you really sure?" Her voice was laced with amusement. Arizona loved how Callie had just made this moment less awkward or tense. She smiled at the brunette and brought her free hand to a curve waist.

"Oh… yeah. I mean… Actually. Your debt may be a little more than one kiss." Bold, that was what she was being right now, because she doubted that after this little kiss she would be able to resist Callie ever again.

"Oh, really?" Callie asked, sliding her hand from Arizona's cheek to her bare neck. A whole new wave of electricity run through Arizona's body in anticipation. She had no idea when was the last time she was at the receiving end of such an intimate touch, even if it was a chaste one. What was going to happen next terrified her to no end. But right now, she didn't think she really cared.

"Yeah, more like five kisses. Or ten." And in a second, Callie's perfect mouth was peppering her lips with one, two, three, four, five… She lost count at the 13th small kiss and just hopped that this little bubble they were starting to create was made of concrete instead of soap.

* * *

Callie and Arizona's little moment was interrupted just a little after they started kissing. They were startled by the little lamps lighting up all around the venue. Night had come. For the sake of taking things slow, they decided to walk back to where everyone else was, hand in hand. The bride and groom were still taking pictures around the place. Arizona had dragged Callie to sit with their parents, in which was supposed to be the groom's family table. Much to Barbara's delight and Daniel's curiosity. The fact was that her parents seemed to appreciate Callie's presence. And the brunette looked pretty much at ease around the old couple after a few minutes of conversation.

It was funny how things with Callie went a bit reverse in their 'growing relationship'. They were friends first, Callie met her family, they had a serious conversation about their 'intentions'… All of that before sharing a first kiss. How strange was it nowadays? She was definitely not a chaste woman. And a strong believer that people were free to do as they pleases. One would not judge a woman for getting laid in the first date while in Arizona's presence. Who knew her was not fool enough to try. But this, with Callie, was happening different from all of her previous experiences and she was glad about it.

The newlyweds occupied the saloon just a bit later, for their first dance by the sound of a disturbingly good 'I'm sexy and I know it' and 'Unforgettable' mash up. Callie was almost falling from her chair watching Tim's weird dance. Emma just couldn't really concentrate on the choreography as she laughed at her husband improvisation. Barbara was in complete awe of it all. But well, her mother was always in complete awe of everything her kids did, as long as they weren't causing other people any hurt. And The Colonel… He was failing to hide the little smile under the hand over his mouth. Today was a happy day.

"Someone looks happy." Tim declared. The father and daughter dance had come and gone and right now there was only family dancing on the floor. Emily was still dancing with her father, but Tim had stopped dancing with Barbara to dance with Arizona. That was something he could not ever pass. He had to dance with his little sister at his wedding. As he was going to make sure he would dance with Arizona at her own wedding someday, as he promised when she was still a teenager.

"How could I not be happy at my brother's wedding?" Arizona questioned, giving him a sincere dimpled smile.

"I don't know why you even try to fool me, lil sis. You know that it never works." He winked and squeezed her hand.

"Because, Timmy, sometimes I want to keep things to myself."

"You always want to keep things to yourself." Truth, but when was that ever possible with Timothy Robbins?

"Well, some things more than others." She half sang and watched him smile. There was no way she was going to say anything about her and Callie right now. The moment they had earlier, she wanted it to be only between them.

"Okay. I won't make you talk. But I may have seen something a little earlier in that cute little garden looking at the beach." Her face scrunched up, to which he pulled back and surprised her by twirling her around.

"Then you already know more than you should." She chastised. Was her brother trying to embarrass her in front of Callie or what? She was not a good dancer.

"Okay. Okay. I'm happy that you are happy today, sis." Tim said with a serious tone and pulled her into a hug.

"I'm happy for being happy too." Arizona admitted while resting her head on his chest and letting him sway her to the song until it ended.

"Don't you think you should invite your girl for a dance?" Tim asked, looking at Callie's direction. She was still sitting by their family's table and didn't seem bothered by the situation or by the fact that Arizona had left her alone. But it wasn't exactly polite to leave a lady alone in a place she barely knew anyone. Teddy was making her company while Tim and Arizona danced, but she was now nowhere to be seen.

"Yeah, I'm just trying to avoid the embarrassment." Arizona sighed and pulled back from her brother's arms, avoiding looking at Callie, not to let her know they were talking about her.

"Why?"

"She's a latina, Tim. You have no idea how freaking good at dancing she is." Some of those moves she saw the woman make months ago should not be legal.

"And you know that because?" He asked, curious.

"Because the second time I saw her, she danced a latin song with a guy at this bar Teddy dragged me to."

"It's a slow song, Zona." He made his point by slightly raising his hand to make her notice the song which had just started playing. "You can avoid mutilating her feet during a slow dance, I'm sure." Arizona didn't say anything, but took a deep breath. In fact she had just danced a slow song with her brother and she didn't step on his feet once. "Oh, and Teddy told me what you guys did. I have to give it to you, sis. Smooth… And you definitely have a good taste for dresses."

"Don't start me on it. Her looking stunning doesn't make it any easier." Callie's tanned long leg on show by the crevice in her dress was definitely something else. She just knew it would look good on her. And the red color? She was actually impressed about how well she had done by choosing that dress. It complimented Callie in all the right ways.

"You only have yourself to blame."

"Aham, as if she wouldn't look good in a potato sack." Tim laughed at the desperate state her sister was in. It was funny seeing Arizona Robbins out of place.

"True. Now go, dance with her. You have to practice for your guys wedding." He teased as he finally freed her hand and pushed her toward the woman in discussion.

"You are insufferable. My God! Bye, Tim." She walked out, hearing Tim's laugh and gathering the last of courage she needed.

* * *

"I have to warn you that I'm very very bad at this." Arizona said, her hand extended to the brunette in invitation. Her intention was clear and the timid smile she was wearing gave her away. She was nervous and Callie found it to be rather cute.

She took the proffered hand and stood from her chair. "I'm sure we can do something about it." Arizona nodded and guided her to the dance floor. They stood in front of each other, not really knowing what do to. Callie didn't know what the implications of such display would be. For all she knew, Arizona's family was well aware of her sexuality and pretty much supported her. But there was Emily's family and anyone who wasn't actually close to the blonde. She didn't want to make a scene.

But Arizona confidently put her small hands on her waist and pulled her closer, their bodies touching. Their eyes locked and Arizona smiled at her as if saying that it was okay. As Callie smiled back, she felt Arizona's hand travel to wrap around her neck. Tanned hands immediately came to round the blonde's slim waist. Their bodies swayed slowly to the sound of one of Ella Fitzgerald's songs. A few days ago Callie never really thought she would be with Arizona like this, no matter how much she wished she would. She was trying to be cautious. This… This had all the potential to become something truly meaningful. But she had been in this position many times before and it had never ended well. She always fell so easily. And Arizona 'was' easy to fall for. So, even though she wanted to let things progress between them, she didn't want it to be out of hand. She couldn't deny, however, how good it was to be here.

"I'm very glad you invited me." Callie confessed.

"I'm very glad too." Arizona simply said; the sincerity in her voice sounded with such relief. The brunette tightened her hold on the smaller woman, making their bodies completely flush against one another. Their faces were so close Callie was afraid she wouldn't resist repeating their little intimate moment in the garden earlier. Not to give in into the temptation, she rested her forehead on Arizona's and closed her eyes while they danced. It was when she was able to completely feel the other woman. The fabric of Arizona's mint dress touched Callie's bare leg every time their bodies moved to her right. Arizona's breasts were pressed against her chest, the thumb of the blonde's right hand affectionately brushing over the base of her neck. Callie sighed deeply. There was nothing sexual about that moment, but it felt intimate and right and so good.

"We don't have to problematize this, do we?" Arizona asked in a whisper.

Callie didn't really know the right answer for that. And she knew Arizona was still struggling with their new 'relationship status', whatever it was at the moment. But no, in her opinion, there was nothing to discuss about it right now. Right now they were good as they were.

"I don't think we have any problems to discuss right now. Do you?" She asked, pulling back a little to look at her blue eyes.

"Not right now, no."

"As long as I'm feeling good about you and you are feeling good about me, Arizona... There won't be anything to worry about."

"I'm feeling good." Arizona said, with confidence. And it was true, Callie could see right through her eyes.

"So am I. You don't need to worry, Arizona. Nor think too much into it. You like me. I like you. Let's just like one another, okay?"

Arizona nodded and Callie came closer again, depositing a kiss to her cheek. The blonde hugged her closer and rested her head over her shoulder.

* * *

Barbara Robbins was no fool. Her daughter was in love. And she was a proud mama. Her baby girl had always been the gentlest little girl, but brave. The most polite person, but never lost an argument. The most loving person, but never fooled. She was intelligent and beautiful and proud. And happy. Arizona had always been a happy person. But she had only seen her little girl in love once, during college. And Barbara feared for her daughter's future. Because as a woman who had loved deeply and lived completely, Barbara knew well enough that there was no money or success capable of making someone as happy as true companionship.

Her daughter's beliefs were others and she understood them, and, in fact, agreed. Love is not everything. But neither was money nor success. Not that Arizona did what she did for one or another. No. Her daughter did it for her values, her principles, for believing in fighting for the right things. But her principles wouldn't dance with her at her brother's wedding. Nor kiss her goodnight. They would not talk to her late at night, hug her when she was hurting, give her a family. And Arizona deserved all of that.

"Oh, Daniel. Look at them." She said, diverting the Colonel's attention to where she was looking.

"Yeah, that sure is a rare sight." The colonel smiled. Her little girl was not a little girl for a long time now. It was sad, but it was also rewarding. To see what a beautiful woman his squishy, fragile, adorable little baby had become.

"What do you think?" She wanted to know. Because if it depended on her, she would be starting plans for another wedding by tomorrow morning.

"I think I hope for both of our kids to be as happy as I am with you Barb." The colonel smiled at his wife and pecked her on the lips.

" _Oh why, Oh why_

 _It's the easiest way_

 _To know you're alive_

 _And the beauty you heard_

 _I see her talking with her hands_

 _Well, I don't think she knows_

 _How she changed all my plans."_

 _(Wasted Time – Vance Joy)_

* * *

AN: Wow! Only 17 days between updates? I'm patting myself in the back for it. And I'm upploading it from my phone's 3G (my very 'good' Samsung J1 that I've been using for a year since my real phone broke), because I have no wifi at the moment. Well, life if less busy right now, since I'm officially done with my residency program and am currently unemployed. Hopefully not for too long. But, well, I won't have this much free time for long. In fact, next week I should go back to a heavy routine, studying. I have a lot of exams coming up. As many may not know, for my career here in Brazil, the most secure way to get a job is by doing exams. The hospitals needing new personal do some kind of selective process in which everyone wanting to work does an exam. And who scores higher gets the job, a job which will be yours forever. They can't fire you, unless you do something VERY wrong. But anyways, life will consist now on trying those kinds of exams all around the country, since my plans to do a Master's in Canada didn't work out. Canadians, we lost one another. That's sad! And I'll be finally getting my driver's license too. But enough of my personal life. Who wants to know about that? Let's talk a bit about the whole Sarah and Jessica being fired thing. If I'm being honest with you guys, I'm not exactly sad because they are living. But don't get me wrong. The reason why I'm not sad is because I think they were being completely left out. I mean, their characters storylines were so ridiculous since season 12 that it was being a complete waste of their talent as actresses. It felt a bit humiliating for me to be in a show which does not give your character, a REALLY IMPORTANT character, a solid, real, good storyline to play. That being said, even though I'm not exactly sad, I'm SOOO MAD at them for doing what they are doing to the actresses. Was I one of them, I would feel even more humiliated by the way they did it. They are my favorites in the show since they started. I always loved annoying April. Since her first episode. And Arizona... Well, Arizona is my favorite. I think that is quite obvious in my writing. And the worst is that I know I won't be pleased with the way Arizona will leave. Because I'll hate if she ends the show with Carina (which is the most boring character ever) and I'll hate it if she ends up with Callie because they will not make it happen the right way and will probably only mention something about Arizona going to NY to be with her. It will suck both ways. Well, enough ranting... I think this chapter is one you will really like. Let me know your opinion and what you think will happen next. Also, I was soooo happy to see everyone's reviews. After so many months, there are quite a few of you still reading and that made me very happy. As always, all mistakes are mine. Sorry about them. And finally, I was able to answer everyone individually in the review section. So check that there.


	12. Chapter 12: Choosing light over darkness

**Chapter 12: Choosing lightning over darkness**

" _Let me take pictures of your shadows_

 _Capture your counters, edit them in might_

 _Save them in my heart."_

Six weeks, that was how long Callie and Arizona have been doing this, whatever this was. The image above her eyes was like all the stars were falling from the sky. And it almost was. She didn't know how long her "relationship" with Arizona would last, as much as she wanted it to be an indefinite period of time. But this moment, tonight, was going to be one she would remember for the rest of her life.

They were currently laid on a very comfy white duvet, sharing a small cushion where their heads were resting closely together, and looking at the sky during what Arizona said was called the Perseid Meteor Shower, in Joshua Tree Park. Apparently, this phenomenon happened rather often, around august, and you could watch it in some places. There were small groups of people here too, but far enough from where they decided do sit and talk and have a little bit to drink and eat. It was basically a picnic at night… under a meteor shower. 'Now, tell me. How one could ever forget something like this?'

The blonde had sent a message yesterday asking if she was on call this sunday night. She would be at the hospital only until 5pm. Arizona then sent her another message with strict instructions. She was supposed to take a little nap at any time she had the opportunity and be ready to be picked up at exactly 5pm, wearing comfortable clothes and sneakers or boots. The last item in the instructions was only to trust her. And she did. Supposedly, this was Arizona's way to celebrate the cartilage article Callie had written finally getting published, as the blonde said it would, in the best ortho scientific journal in the US. In fact, Callie had already even received some calls from companies offering money for her to continue the research. And so, Callie thought that was actually worthy of some good celebration.

Now, here they were, sharing something beautiful, magnificent. Magical, even! Arizona was so… Perfect. There was really no other way to describe her. She did have flaws, Callie came to find out these last weeks. She was insecure, sometimes, about the way she acted around the brunette. She was a bit bossy, maybe because that was just how she was, having the job she had. She was very opinionated, as she showed in some very heated discussions they had about some subjects. And Callie wasn't fool enough to think that she would never find some more or that this amazing bubble they were in would never pop and the way they acted towards each other would never change. She knew it would. And she actually craved it, because it would mean they would be more than what they were right now.

Right at this moment, though, she couldn't get out of her head just how beautiful Arizona was. The way she had been making the effort of having a bit of time for Callie as often as she could, even if it was just once a week or every ten days. The way she always made sure to be present somehow, each day, in a text message, in a delivery of really good coffee during the evening when she had to stay at the hospital for the night shift. Or calling her when she knew she was in surgery just to make her cellphone ring and play the song the blonde had set up to be her personal tune, the first part of Drake's song "Legend". She smiled just remembering it. And all of that perfection made it harder for Callie not to have Arizona for herself, entirely. This freaking amazing sky with Arizona by her side made it harder. Because it would sooner rather than later end and she was going to be left wondering when would be the next time they would be together again.

"You have to stop at some point, you know?", Callie declared, eyes fixed on the falling lights.

"Stop what?", Arizona asked, turning her head to look at Callie.

"Doing all these things for me." Callie had been a bit abrupt in the way of saying it. But there were already too many things that couldn't been said between them.

It took a moment for Arizona to answer, but her voice came in a slightly disappointed tone. "You don't like it?"

Callie averted her eyes from the dark sky to the bright one in the blonde's blue irises. "I love it, Arizona. I love every little thing you do for me." She half smiled and brought her hand to caress a pale cheek. "But it doesn't make it easier", she stated letting her hand fall.

"You told me not to worry or think too much into this and that we should just like one another", she reminded the brunette, her brows furrowed, partially not understanding what this was about.

"I did." Callie nodded, without knowing what else to say. It was true. And she still felt that way, even when it made a little bit harder for her to deal with the whole situation.

In the last weeks, Callie had thought about their conversation at the wedding many many times. Almost as if reliving it as a way of trying to understand exactly what Arizona felt and why was it so hard for her to be in a serious relationship. It didn't make a lot of sense to Callie, if she was being honest.

She understood that Arizona was busy and she understood what having a company meant. But that wasn't all. And Tim's worlds at that night in Arizona's little get together at VOX played in her mind constantly. Because maybe the blonde's brother had confessed what was the blonde's real struggle. However, it would be a much wiser decision to wait for the other woman to admit all of that herself. It didn't seem to be close to happen any time soon, though.

"I don't get it. Are you regretting that we are doing this?" She was going into defensive mode, clear frustration in her voice. And maybe a little hurt.

The brunette smiled at Arizona. 'Your walls are so so high.' It was not really funny. But she didn't want to turn this in what could potentially be their first fight. She wouldn't let that happen. Not tonight. Tonight had started too perfect to end in a fight. "No", Callie said and leaned in, depositing a kiss right in between Arizona's eyebrows and then on her lips. As they parted, she felt Arizona sigh and brush their noses together.

"What, then?" She asked, calmly.

"It makes it harder for me not to want to be by your side", Callie started and pulled out a little. She felt Arizona's eyes on her profile, as she looked back to the sky. It would make it easier for her to just say how she felt every time Arizona did one of those little things. All of the things Arizona did felt like a two ways path, a double edged sword. And Arizona needed to understand that. "You send me flowers and I want to thank you in person and that is not really always possible. You send a driver to pick me up at the airport when I'm coming back from Miami, without me knowing, and I want him to drive me to where you are, but that is not actually appropriate. You send me a message telling me to trust you and pack a little bag to come somewhere with you but it will be only in the next day and I wish I could go meet you as soon as I finish reading the message." The sound of Arizona moving by her side made her a little nervous.

"Callie…", Arizona said, from a little above of her, now. She was laid on her side, elbow resting on the cushion, arm bent and head resting on her hand.

"I know, Arizona. I told you I understand you are a busy person." Callie looked back at the other woman.

"You did. What am I supposed to do? You want me to stop?" Arizona simply asked, frustrated again. Add that to her collection of flaws, the blonde was quite impatient. Luckly, at least with Arizona, Callie normally wasn't.

"No. Not really." The latina giggled. The idea seemed ridiculous to her. How do you give up one of the few things making you really happy in life? She didn't want this to stop at all.

"You are a little crazy, you know?" A pale hand traveled in a caress through a tanned arm, resting on Callie's own hand, over her stomach.

"Oh, I do. I totally am." She smiled, because she was. There were many stories to prove that. She was wild and adventurous and courageous and yes, crazy.

"Tell me what you want…" Arizona caressed Callie's fingers with her thumb.

What did Callie want? There was no right answer for that. She didn't know if she was allowed to want anything.

"Are we supposed to be seeing anyone else?", Callie asked out of the blue. The thought crossed her mind in a millisecond. They had never talked about it. She didn't think Arizona was seeing anyone besides her, but what if she wanted to? Were they exclusive?

"What?" It was clear Arizona was caught by surprise, her movements over the caramel fingers stopping.

"I just want to know where we stand", Callie shrugged.

"I'm not seeing nor intend to see anyone else." Arizona looked at their hands and back to face Callie. "Are you?"

"Nope. But could we?" Not even Callie knew what she was asking anymore. But the fact that they weren't seeing anyone else didn't exactly mean they 'couldn't' or shouldn't. Maybe deep down she just wanted to make sure that this little portion of Arizona was only hers.

"Callie, if that is your way of telling me you want to date other people, I..." Arizona started to pull out, and sat by Callie's side. "I think I can't tell you no, right? I mean…"

"I don't want to date anyone. I was just curious." Callie interrupted her, lamenting the loss of contact between them immediately.

"I have little time to date you. I wouldn't have time to date two people." Arizona declared in what was an obvious understatement.

"Oh, so if you had time you would?" Callie widened her eyes and feigned hurt, knowing well that was not what the blonde had wanted to say.

"What? No. Callie…"

"Hey. I was just teasing." A smile gracing red lips, she brought her hand to Arizona's, which was resting close to her arm. She squeezed it and brought it closer to her face to deposit a kiss on the soft skin.

"If I had more time I'd want to spend it all with you." Arizona traced the back of her fingers over Callie's mouth and smiled sweetly.

"Smooth, Robbins…" The brunette kissed her fingers and smiled back.

"What do you want me to do?" The blonde asked, turning her body so she could be in front of Callie's laid form, legs crossed.

"Nothing…"

"Nothing? What's the point in bringing that up, then?" She questioned, her tone neutral.

"I thought we were supposed to be honest?" That and the fact that Callie needed to share how she felt or it would probably make her start to lose sleep.

"We are. So, I'm just supposed to tune down my charm?" There was a small smirk on Arizona's face.

Callie laughed at the other woman's little joke. It was not a common occurrence and it made her look cute. "Please, don't." She watched Arizona smile at her and bit her lower lip. It lasted a second, until the blonde averted her eyes and looked around for her phone. She typed on it for a bit. "What are you doing?"

"Checking my agenda." Arizona said simply. Callie sighed and didn't have time to say anything about it before her own phone vibrated by her side. She didn't feel the need to check, but Arizona kept typing. So she just decided to see what it was. She was actually surprised there was phone reception here. As soon as she grabbed the phone, a new message got in. * **Don't be mad at me for typing on my phone while we should be kissing and watching meteors, it's for a good cause. Read the message above.***

"What is this?" She was a bit confused. It was a message with dates and what she thought were meetings and deadlines for things in Arizona's business.

"All the compromises I have for the next month. The stuff that can't be moved or that I can't not attend. The rest of the time? Feel free to choose any time for us to do anything you want." Arizona said and put her phone aside.

"Arizona…"

"Hey, take the opportunity while you can." The blonde smiled. This was a big thing, Callie thought, for someone who was not able to lose control over things, most importantly, things about her work... The latina didn't think she would get to be happier than she already was here tonight. But then, she just did.

"How many times I can do that?" Callie tried her luck, locking her phone and putting it away too. She would look at it very intently later.

"Uh, I thought it was a one-time thing?" Arizona smiled sheepishly, to what Callie giggled.

"Three?"

"Two and we have a deal." Arizona extended her hand as if settling a contract or something. 'You are something else, my dear.'

"Alright. Now come here." Callie took the proffered hand and pulled her in. Arizona laid by her side again and was immediately met with Callie's lips on hers, in a short sweet kiss. "You are amazing, you know that?"

"I try." Arizona shrugged.

"No. You achieve." Putting a strand of blonde hair behind Arizona's ear, she kissed her again, deeply this time. Arizona's taste took over her taste buds. Her lips were sweet, soft, addictive. And she doubted it had anything to do with the strawberries they had just eaten. "Thank you. And thank you for this. This is the most beautiful thing someone has ever done for me and the second most beautiful thing I have ever seen." Arizona's eyes smiled as her cheeks pulled up along with her mouth.

"Thank you for coming."

* * *

The last meeting of the day was coming to an end and Arizona couldn't be more relieved. She and Callie had arrived back at the city around 4am. After Arizona gave Callie her agenda for the month and they settled back together watching the sky, it didn't take long before she fell asleep, unintentionally. She woke up startled an hour later. Apparently, Callie stayed awake the whole time, watching the meteors and holding her. By the time they got to Arizona's car it was one in the morning. They could have easily stayed in the hotel at the park, but both of them needed to work early in the morning. The drive home was most filled with silence as half way through the way back Callie finally succumbed to her own tiredness on the passenger's seat. Arizona had woken her with some resistance. Callie was definitely a heavy sleeper. After a few nudges and some kisses to her cheek, the latina was awake and pouting. A few minutes and a heavy session of kisses later, Arizona was driving alone back home. She was completely exhausted, but weirdly happy.

"I think we are finally done. Now we just have to really really run with all the other processes." Laura, Arizona's editor, said, typing quickly on her laptop for a second and then powering it off.

"I can't believe I finally finished writing this. It was kinda hard." She had finished writing her book a week ago. After Tim's wedding she completely immersed herself in it and put an end to the torture of having a deadline. Laura had come here today to finish the last bits of the editing process.

"It is amazing, Arizona. People will love you after this. Just wait and see."

"No, don't make me too famous, please." She whined. "I like being anonymous and the whole semi naked pictures in the beginning of the year already compromised that in some ways." Arizona really wanted to forget about that. It was impossible, it seemed. At least no one was talking about it anymore.

"Speaking of pictures… The last thing we have to discuss is the picture for the book cover. We need them by the end of the week, guys." She said directing her attention to Emily. Tim and Emily had finally settled themselves in Los Angeles. Her brother was back from the war, but was definitely not completely out of his duties. He was now stationed in the state's capital and in active preparation to start training new recruits. When her brother called Arizona about the prospects of Emily working in her company, the blonde woman didn't think twice. In fact, Emily could have chosen whatever she wanted to do. Her sister in law had studied to be a manageress. In San Diego, she was working in a small company of local produce. Arizona remembered, though, that the woman had always had a great intuition about photography. She had never worked with it. But why not now? It was a new start for everyone, after all. When she proposed Emily to do her new book pictures, the woman, even though apprehensive, decided to give it a go. It was one of her passions and if she could transform a hobby in paying work, what bad would it do? "We really can't wait much longer to publish, Arizona. This book was supposed to be out three months ago. It's august and we have only three months to finish the cover and print it all out."

"I'm really sorry, Laura. When we made the deal I had no idea I would sign not one, not two, but THREE major contracts here at VOX and end up hiring 20 new people. It's not Emily's fault. I only had time to take the pictures Thursday. She still had to work with one of our people to edit how I envisioned it to be."

"I know. You are at the top of your career right now. It has to be a bit crazy. And that is a good enough subject for another book, actually." Laura suggested.

"Oh, no. None of that, Laura. My contract was for 3 books. This is the last one. I'll be surely taking at least a two year break before I sign any other publishing contract. Don't get me wrong." She drank the last bit of her cold coffee. August was hot as hell but she still needed her caffeine.

"No offense taken." The editor smiled. "But have you ever thought about, like, filming it?"

"Filming what?" The blonde had no idea what she was talking about.

"Your work here. How things happen and all of that stuff." It seemed Laura was serious about the proposition. Not that she worked for a filming company, but… Arizona was not impressed by it at all, though.

"You really just asked me that, Laura? You don't know me enough." She laughed.

"She doesn't even give live interviews, Laura. I wanna live to see the day she will film herself in a documentary." Emily piped up from where she was seated with her own laptop, in the other table Arizona had in her office.

"Who would even be interest in that, guys?"

"Arizona, you are invisible because you want to be. You make a big effort to keep your privacy and I understand that completely. I actually admire that. But really, the world would be a happy place if it actually found out about you."

"What are you talking about?"

"I'm talking about worldwide career. I'm just your editor. You know this better than me. Advertisement is the soul of business. The more you try to hide yourself, the more you keep this company from growing beyond you could ever imagine."

The idea of it seemed tempting and completely agonizing at the same time. She was already big enough. The whole California knew her. Hell, maybe the whole country. The ones who mattered, at least.

"I don't know if I want it to be much bigger than this. I'm already dying working as it is." People didn't quite seem to understand Arizona's way of working. She liked being on top of everything. Being bigger than what she already was would not allow her to continue that. And she refused to be that kind of business woman who didn't know anything about what was happening just a level below her office. No. She was not the main responsible for every little job her company did. But she definitely knew everything about everything. She liked it being that way. She was not about to change it. Her company was entirely herself, not in the owning aspect of it – because she liked to think that VOX was a home to everyone who worked here, just like It was for herself. But because she was present in everything VOX produced.

"That's because you don't know how to delegate, Arizona." Emily said. Arizona widened her eyes. Her mother was probably the only person who had said that so bluntly to her before. Tim didn't have reservations in hitting her with truths, either. Maybe her brother was intoxicating this fine woman. However, she didn't quite agree with Emily's statement.

"Didn't I just say that I hired 20 new people?"

"Okay. Let me say it better. You know how to delegate. You are really good at bossing around, but you end up almost doing everyone's job, because you can't not have things under your eyes 24/7. I even saw you getting here earlier one morning and going to the kitchen to make the coffee."

Laura laughed and Arizona would be embarrassed if she was any other person. But she wasn't, so she just laughed too.

"You know Marta's coffee is a bit depressive. Why do you think I don't drink coffee here? It's not fair my employees have to drink that."

"And then you are the one who have to make it?"

"It was one time. I just wanted to make everyone here happy. It was a very gloomy Monday."

"Then maybe get someone who is good enough at making coffee."

"You know I wouldn't ever do that. But you actually gave me an idea. Maybe it is about time to sign some kind of contract with a small nice food company who could provide us with a good coffee and some goodies."

"Now that seems a good solution. As long as you don't think it is your job to supervise them working too, because as far as we know, kitchen is one of the few things you are not good at."

After another round of laughter, Laura stood from her chair and colleted her things. "Well, I have to go. Gotta make this happen as fast as possible."

"Thank you, Laura. Keep in touch about all the details. I wanna know more about that possible tour thing." Laura had proposed Arizona with a book tour. She said many many people had sent them e-mails about the possibility of a tour in her last book. It was not possible at the time. Maybe it would be a nice thing to do for the fans. Arizona didn't like the idea of having fans. But she understood some people really liked her book and admired her and felt connect to her through what she wrote. And somehow, her fans were nowhere near as invasive as the fans from people on TV. She used to get a few letters here and there and that was it. She loved it that way.

"Sure. Have a good day you both. And I will be expecting the photos friday morning, girls. Don't make me beg, PLEASE?" That made them all laugh once again.

"So. You've been working here for two months and already joined the team of those who want to get rid of me, huh?" Arizona asked Emily, after Laura was out the door.

"Nope. But I'm supposed to get here earlier than you and I have never got here these last two months without you having already arrived. I go home at 5 and you are still here. And I just happen to know that you hate working from home and that leads me to think that you probably only go home late night most days."

"This is a complot. I'm too nice to people, that's why everyone has the liberty of pointing out my flaws." The blonde declared, shaking her head in disapproval.

"Hey. I'm everyone now?" Her sister in law faked hurt.

"What? No. I was talking about Laura just now giving me a peep talk. Even Barbara called me saturday afternoon at 5 and said 'I know you're at VOX. It's time to go home, Arizona. Try to take some rest.'" Arizona repeated her assistant's words as if imitating her, what made Emily chuckle.

"We just worry about you. Talking about assistants…" The other woman gave a dramatic pause. "How is the whole Julie thing?"

Arizona sighed heavily. She and Julie didn't have a proper talk since everything happened, almost six months ago. At this point she wasn't sure if that talk should even still happen. Things between them were still a bit awkward. Not to the point of making every encounter uncomfortable, but sometimes it was still stressful to not be able to just be around Julie as it was before. She wanted things normal and easy. And she was sure Julie wanted that too. But, for that to happen, or the proper talk had to take place or a longer period of time had to pass. Both options had pros and cons. "She keeps quiet most times when she is in my presence. Which is a relief, but it is also kinda sad. I like her very much. She is just that sweet girl who I gave the first job after graduating college and she has struggled a lot in life, you know. I feel like I have some kind of responsibility over her. She is not a bad person. She just…"

"Fell for you." Emily completed when Arizona didn't finish her sentence.

"Yeah…", she sighed.

"Does… Uh, does Callie know about her?" Oh, that question. If Arizona said she had spent long moments thinking and dwelling about talking with Callie about Julie, she would be lying. Mostly because she wasn't really think about anything that didn't have to do with VOX nowadays. But she did have a mental battle with herself one night, a month after Tim's wedding. Arizona had come to the conclusion that Callie would know everything she had to know about her when they became official. That thought alone warmed and scared her. Because it was the first time she thought about Callie as something that would be certain in her life. As if their relationship was not going to be a matter of yes or no, but a matter of when. She needed just a little bit more time.

"No. I don't think there is a need for Callie to know about us. At least not now. I'll tell her eventually, when we come to be something more." The blonde saw Emily smile and she knew why.

"Well, I hope everything works well for you guys. I think you look cute as a couple."

* * *

"Hey. Callie!" Arizona stood from her chair and walked to her office door when she heard a knock and a raven haired head peek from behind it. Callie smiled her way and stepped in. "What are you doing here?" She asked in a surprised but happy tone. It was close to 10pm and Arizona was startled by security a few a minute ago, asking if she would be prone to receive a woman who was looking for her. At this time at night, the whole building was already locked, very few people now and then stayed this late. Mostly her, some people in the editing department and sometimes Karev. She didn't know who else was at the building. But she sure knew that Callie had to talk through the men in security to convince them to talk to her. She wondered what she had told them.

"Trying my luck? I didn't know if you would still be here. It's late." Callie looked tired, but content it seemed. Getting closer, she brought her hands around the brunette's neck and hugged her, inhaling her scent. She still smelled a bit like hospital, maybe her hair. But her neck had the distinct smell of her perfume, which Arizona had come to love.

"Hm. You were working until now?" Arizona asked, depositing a kiss just below her ear. Callie's hand came to her waist, squeezing her sides, before circling tanned arms around her body.

"No. I got out around 8pm. Went to the bar with some friends."

"How did you get here?" Arizona pulled back a little. She didn't like the idea of Callie drinking and driving.

"In my car. I only drank soda." That was perfectly acceptable, Arizona thought, and brought her face back to Callie's neck. She liked it there. More than she wanted to admit. These last weeks with the gorgeous brunette had been… Good. Very good. Better than almost every good week she remembered having.

"Hmm." She hummed. The comfort of Callie's embrace at this time at night, after a sleepless night and a full on work day was very calming. Her body was suddenly starting to complain. Because now her eyes were heavy, her back was starting to ache and her stomach would surely be grumbling soon.

"Remember what you said to me yesterday?" Callie asked. Her low voice sounding close to Arizona's ear while the latina caressed her back up and down.

"Mhm. What about it?"

"Well. I have plans."

"You do?" Arizona reluctantly pulled back once again. She was excited to go out with Callie, she just didn't think the brunette would be so quick to decide on something.

"Yep. This Friday at 3pm." The other woman spoke with confidence. Her eyebrows suggestively turned up, a small smile on her mouth.

"Uh. This Friday? 3pm?"

"Yeah. Is there a problem? It didn't shock with any of your important meetings." Well, not really. But now she had to think about everything she had planned for that afternoon and move it around her schedule so she wouldn't get behind on her work.

"No. No. Let me just check and ask Barbara to…" Arizona started saying and pulled back completely, dropping her hands from around Callie's neck and turning to her desk so she could get a hold of her phone. A hand grabbed her wrist and pulled her back.

"It's late, Arizona. Barbara is probably sleeping." With Callie's other hand coming to comb through her hair, she squinted her eyes and smiled. "Don't move from here just yet." Callie said, hugging her again.

"Hm. Okay." The blonde rested her head on the surgeon's chest, only to be startle when Callie suddenly held her by the arms, pulling back.

"Actually. Wait right here for a second."

Arizona watched the woman get out of the office and come back after a few seconds, a single flower in her hand.

"I'm not really good with grand gestures as you are." She said, stopping in front of Arizona. "But I thought that you would appreciate this." Arizona took the red rose and smelled it. "So, Arizona, will you go on a date with me?" It wouldn't be their first date, but it still made Arizona think like this was going to be different.

"I think my delivery was much more pleasant than yours were." Arizona answered, nose still buried in between the red petals. "Thank you! You don't need to make any grand gesture. You are already amazing as you are." It was true. To Arizona, Callie was becoming every day a little bit more special.

"Is that a yes, then?"

"That is definitely a yes." Giving a step towards Callie, Arizona covered the red lips with her pink ones in a slow kiss. She held the tanned face with her free hand while trying to get permission to get in the confines of that delicious mouth.

"Hm. I never thought a stolen rose from a friend's bouquet would reward me with kisses like this." Callie declared jokingly. Arizona giggled. She never thought she would be this content about getting a stolen rose either. And for that, she kissed Callie again. A lingering peck.

"So. Will you be here for much longer?"

"Not really. I only have to write two e-mails and finish a really simple concept for a campaign." If she finished it tonight, she could get here tomorrow an hour later and she needed that. A little bit more of sleep after last night.

"Do you mind if I make you company?"

"Aren't you tired?" Arizona brought her hand to caress the woman's cheek, her thumb dragging itself back and forth on the smooth skin.

"A little bit. But… Well."

"Hey, I'm not rejecting your company. I'm just worried. We didn't really sleep last night." She assured Callie.

"I took a nap in one of the on call rooms."

"Well, then you are more than invited to hang around. I'll only be about half an hour." Arizona gave her one last little peck on the lips and pulled back, walking around her desk and sitting down. She rested put the rose aside, making a mental note to remember to take it home with her.

Arizona concentrated on finishing her e-mails while Callie walked around and took a look on everything. She had been in Arizona's office only that one time they had lunch and didn't have time to observe the environment. A few minutes later, when Arizona didn't hear any noise coming from Callie discovering new pieces of information about the blonde while looking through her shelves and knick knacks, she averted her eyes from the computer screen and looked for the brunette. She was standing in front of the big glass wall, eyes fixated on the city lights. While blue eyes were completely fixated on her.

"Thinking about our loneliness

As well as our togetherness

Rather die as us than you and I…"

(Run, Lucifer – Adna)

* * *

 **AN:** Hey, everyone. I'm so sad with Arizona's ending on Grey's. I'm sorry, but I really really didn't like it. Because for me it made no sense at all. They did exactly what I thought they would do if they ever made Calzona endgame. They made it superficial. Also, I HATED that Teddy came back pregnant with Owen's child. That was completely out of line for me. Not because I don't want Teddy back, because Teddy is my favorite after Arizona and Callie, always was. But because I've been finding Owen disgusting since the day I discovered he came back from war and didn't have the decency of telling his ex-fiancé at the time. Who does that? Selfish, disgusting people, that's who. Anyways. Disappointed is what I am. It's a shame they ended it like that. And I know all the Calzona fans are really happy. I just don't really understand why. Because Calzona, for what it was in the show, deserved much better than that too. Anyways. This chapter took a LONG time for me to write because at first it would be actually divided in two chapters with some more scenes that I had already written and just decide to cut off. At the end, those scenes where not needed. I want to thank very much everyone who reviewed the last chapter. Really. Reviews always make me so happy! Anyways, here it is. All mistakes are mine. And I'm sorry for all of them I'm sure you native english speakers will find. I hope you like the update. I personally like this chapter very much. Please, let me know what you think. And after the end of Arizona and Calzona on tv, let's not let them end here in the fanfiction world too. There are so little active fanfictions nowadays. It makes me sad. Because I'm a really active fanfiction reader and I can't get myself to read any other lesbian couple fanfictions. Also, I wanna just say how much I love Adna's songs. They are mighty sad. Very melancholic. I could even say dark. But they never fail to touch my heart. She has such an incredible voice and the melody in all her songs are so elating. Whoever is into indie music out there, maybe try listening to her. I could speak about her songs for the length of a new chapter, but I'll spare everyone of my fangirling. Oh, and guys, I have a twitter account I use only to post updates on this fanfiction. I've menioned it before. I don't use it too much but it would be nice to interact with the readers on twitter. If anyone is interested. thewreckedship , follow me there. I'll be answering all of you in the review section, tomorrow.


	13. Chapter 13: A small taste of it

**Chapter 13: A small taste of it**

" _There's an ocean inside my head_

 _Waves that don't ever rest_

 _This kind of beauty ain't ordinary_

 _You look, but do you really see?_

 _Won't you take your time on me?"_

Friday, at 3pm straight, Callie parked her car at VOX to collect Arizona. They had shared a sweet peck when the blonde entered the vehicle and the ortho surgeon drove off with Arizona incessantly asking where they were headed off. This was weird, to get out of the building so early, with the sky still so bright and a whole lot of the day still ahead of her. It made her slightly anxious, to not have control about the events of the day. She was not used to not having every hour planed.

They drove around sunny LA for almost two hours, making a quick stop at the beach to have ice cream. It was like she was having a little bit of a taste of what vacations felt like. Funny, to live in Los Angeles, one of the most touristic cities in America, and never have a true moment of appreciation of her surroundings. Surely, most Sundays Arizona didn't work. But that single day in the week was so sacred for her. It was her moment of peace. The one day she could sleep in, put her house in order, lounge on the couch for an hour, take care of herself. Sundays were very rarely spent out, enjoying the city or anyone else's company. Today, though, friday afternoon, this gorgeous woman by her side was making her reality change. And she was glad about it.

"Okay. This is not at all what I was expecting." Arizona declared as the car parked in front of a Target store.

"Points for me for surprising you", Callie smiled her way, unbuckling her seat belt.

"What do we need from here?" The blonde asked, accompanying Callie out of the car.

"Ingredients for what I'll cook for you tonight, at my place… If that is okay with you?" The brunette extended her hand, waiting for Arizona to hold it so they could walk inside.

"Dinner at your place?" Arizona suspiciously asked. She didn't expect that either. Callie had refused to tell her any of the plans for today. She had never been in the other woman's house. In fact they had never been completely alone, by themselves. They were always out somewhere, with people around or just in the next door. The idea of being alone with Callie made her nervous, a cold wave dancing in the pit of her stomach.

"Yes. But you have to promise me that you won't attack me. I mean, I know I'm hard to resist. But you have to keep your hands to yourself. I'm not that easy, you know?" Callie's tone was so neutral that for a moment Arizona thought she was actually being serious. But then, a small smile played on the plump red lips as the woman brought an ivory hand to her lips.

"Callie!" Arizona giggled.

"What?" Callie inquired as they got to the front door.

"You. Are. Crazy." The blonde playfully declared, coming closer to deposit a kiss on the tanned cheek.

"I can't deny that. So… Can we keep going with this?"

With her whole body relaxed now, she flashed her dimples Callie's way and played back. "Yes. I swear I'll try to control my hands." It wouldn't be an easy task, though.

* * *

"I can't believe you have a Super Nintendo."

They had arrived at Callie's home just a few minutes ago. It was close to 6PM. Which meant they probably had to start dinner. But as soon as Arizona put her feet inside the small apartment and looked around, her eyes spotted something she hadn't seen in a lot of years. Around 17 years to be a little more precise. She had looked at Callie with what she was sure was a complete in awe expression. The brunette had just smiled her way and motioned for her to go ahead. The selection of games was not big, but there was Zelda in it, so, everything was good.

"Well, it's only the new mini version they started selling the last year. I used to have one, which I shared with Aria when I was around 9 or 10." Callie said and sat beside Arizona on her sofa. Watching the blonde give her Zelda character a name. "Dimples", she wrote on the screen. She had found out around two weeks ago that that was how Callie named her on her contact list, so, it made sense. "This was actually a present from Aria when I was there the last time visiting. She said it was a gift for getting my article accepted. How appropriate!" They both laughed.

"This is so awesome." She couldn't contain her giddiness. "I had one too. But Tim was so mean to me. He didn't let me play. For a few months we only had one "controller" and I had to wait him play like five rounds until he let me play one. It was so unfair. And then, when I finally got enough money from my allowance and bought a second one, he didn't let me play because I was not able to play the levels he was in and then I would only make him lose. So, I ended up playing only when he was out." The game was starting now and the song playing from the TV made her so incredible happy. It brought good memories from her youth, a time in what she lived so carefree. It was almost as if right at this point she didn't have any worries in the world. Just for now, at least.

"How old were you?"

"10. And he was about to turn 15."

"I thought Tim had always been the best brother out there."

"Oh, he was. Except when it was about playing video games." Arizona averted her eyes from the TV screen to Callie's face and laughed. Watching her giggle in return.

"Well, you can always play with my Nintendo." She unashamedly declared, wiggling her eyebrows. The innuendo was actually cute coming from the gorgeous brunette.

"Callie!" She chastised anyway. "You are impossible today." Arizona shook her head and looked back to the TV, smiling. This here was becoming awfully cozy.

* * *

"Hey, stop that. I can hear your hard thinking from here."

After watching Arizona play for half an hour, Callie got up to start dinner and let the blonde be for a little while. It was now just past 7pm and she was about to finish her cooking. Nothing fancy. Just her usual chicken piccata. It was something she was familiar with cooking and cooking for the first time for Arizona, it had to be something she was sure there was no chance she would fail. Now, she was fairly good in the kitchen, but let's be honest, cooking for 'your girl' for the first time is not the right time to take risks, right?

The blonde had joined her in the last 10 minutes and just sat on a stool by her kitchen island, observing her work around the pans. She hadn't said a word since she sat down. And Callie was starting to get worried. Everything had gone too well today. She didn't want it to take a turn in the opposite direction now. Today, this date, she had debated a long time in her head about what she should do. She tried thinking about fancy extraordinary things. But that was Arizona's way of doing things. Callie just wasn't that familiar or that comfortable with planning elaborate dates. So, at some point during that monday at work, while in surgery she thought that maybe what they both needed was something that would bring them closer. Doing ordinary things together. Because, if at some point they would come to be girlfriends, ordinary was what most days for them would end up being. And she needed to be sure that Arizona would be okay with being ordinary around Callie. Cozy night at home brought a level of comfort they hadn't tried yet. She wanted to bring Arizona closer and maybe let her envision what routine with Callie would look like. And maybe, just maybe, it would ease all of the doubts and insecurities Arizona had about them being officially together. Right about now, though, she wasn't so sure it would work. The blonde went silent and it worried her.

"I'm sorry." She heard the blonde say and sigh. Callie wondered if it would be the right time to push Arizona a little bit. But dinner was almost served, their afternoon had been really good and she truly didn't want to ruin the mood and end the night with dinner in the garbage and watching a movie alone on the sofa.

"What is it that is in your mind?" She cautiously asked, not making eye contact not to intimidate her companion. She turned the stove off and turned around to get some plates.

"It's… nothing."

"And why don't I believe that?" She inquired, putting the plates on the counter and looking directly in the gorgeous blue eyes.

"I'm sorry." Arizona's apology was sincere, but it wasn't enough. Callie wasn't sure about what was going through the blonde's mind. And it was very frustrating. She wanted so much for this between them to work. She wanted her time with Arizona to be enjoyable. She wanted it to be light and simple and easy. But most times, though, there was a moment of insecurity coming from one of them. That had to stop. They should be able to just enjoy each other without the implications of what it could come to be.

"Is this too much for you?" Callie asked, her voice calm and collected. "You wanna go home? I won't be offended." She didn't want Arizona to go, but if that was what she needed, she would understand. She didn't believe it was too soon to have a night in at each other's place. In fact, this normally would have happened way before in any other relationship Callie had ever been in. But maybe for Arizona it was soon.

"No. No, Callie. I want to be here. I promise." The blonde said and Callie believed. The blue in her eyes didn't lie.

"Come here, then." Callie motioned for her to round the kitchen island and come closer. Arizona complied instantly. "Close your eyes." The brunette asked as she trailed her hands up Arizona's arms.

"Callie…"

"Close your eyes, please." She insisted. As Arizona's eyelids closed she took a step back and reached for a spoon. Collecting some of the sauce in her chicken, she blew on it a couple of times and came back closer to the other woman. "Open your mouth." Small lips parted slightly and pink tongue poked from inside, sliding in between the beautiful mouth in a licking motion. Callie's heart picked up its pace and she sighed. She brought the spoon closer to Arizona's face and poured the liquid inside her mouth. "How does it taste?" Callie watched her lips movements and waited for her to swallow.

"Hmmm… Beautiful!" A smile curved on Callie's face as her stomach contorted in pleasure at the sound of Arizona's moan. The blonde's eyes started fluttering open.

"Nope. Don't open them just yet. And wait right here." Callie pulled back and started moving around the kitchen again. She wanted to prove her point about something they talked about in their first "date" right back in that coffee shop.

"What are you doing, Callie?"

"Just trust me, will you?" Her voice was further down the kitchen as she took something out of the fridge. A few seconds later she was close to Arizona again. Another spoon in hand, ready to feed her beautiful date. "Okay. Can you part your lips again?" Arizona's mouth opened and Callie slipped the small spoon past her lips and waited for her to close it. She watched the woman slightly jump at the cold. She probably wasn't expecting that. "Taste it."

"Hmm. Yeah… This tastes very good too!" Callie smiled and gave her a kiss on the cheek. Passion fruit mousse never disappointed anyone. "Callie, I wanna open my eyes."

"Wait just a little bit more." Callie couldn't resist. It was asking too much of her to resist Arizona's lips so close and her small appreciative moans. She smeared the cold dessert on pink lips and covered them with her warm mouth right after. The groan she was rewarded with made her insides turn and she immediately invaded the blonde's mouth with her tongue, not entirely aggressive, but assertive. Arizona's hands came to her waist and squeezed her sides, sighing heavily, in the middle of a rather deep kiss. With both of her hands occupied, Callie lamented the fact that she couldn't bring Arizona even closer. She made sure the lip lock was secure enough, though. Yes, at this point they both were really hungry, but for one another. She bit a bottom lip and soothed the sting sensation with a swipe of her tongue, sucking it slightly and releasing it soundly. A pair of small pecks followed and she pulled back to look at the gorgeous face in front of her. "You can open your eyes now."

"Uh…Hi." Arizona said, slightly out of breath.

"Hi. Was I able to make you stop thinking for a little bit?" She asked and felt Arizona taking the cold bow and spoon from her hands and put it on the counter beside the plates.

"You were." The blonde said and came closer again, hugging Callie in a very intimate and vulnerable way. Her head rested on a tanned shoulder and Callie's arms circled the small frame tight, but gently.

"If what was in your mind had anything to do with me, I want you to know that I'm not here to make things more difficult for you. It is right the opposite, Arizona. I'm here to make it simple. And easier. And good. You don't need to think too much or weigh the pros and cons. You don't need to doubt or over analyze. Give me a little more credit. And give yourself a little more freedom. Okay?" Her little speech was said calmly and in an almost whisper, hands caressing the small back up and down.

"Why are you so perfect?" Arizona asked on her neck, nuzzling it.

"I'm not. You better be sure that I'll be a pain in your ass at some point. Really, don't doubt it. You will probably want to murder me once or twice. But… I'm a good kisser. So that may just compensate for that." Callie said giggling, trying to lighten the mood.

"You are a good kisser, huh?"

Callie could feel Arizona's smile on her skin, the small hairs on her neck instantly pulling up. She swayed them from side to side. "Oh, you haven't been convinced just yet?"

"Nah. I don't think so. You probably should put a little more effort and practice into it." Smiling, Arizona pulled back and looked deeply into brown eyes, teasing.

"Really? And who I should do that with?"

"It just happens that this evening I'm free." The blonde wiggled her brows.

"Oh, how lucky am I? For how long? I mean. I should get all the practice time I can."

Arizona laughed and came closer, kissing her again. It was nowhere near as intense as their previous kiss. But it was still heartwarming and oh so good.

"Okay. We should eat. And then we can have dessert again." Callie declared as she pulled back. She collected the dessert and put it back on the fridge.

"Which one?" Arizona smirked. Well, at least the blonde seemed now completely at ease.

* * *

By 9pm they were sitting in the sofa very close together watching a movie, both their feet resting on the coffee table. Arizona had took a shower and was comfortably wearing Callie's clothes, a small shorts and a very loose tank top, which she unfortunately had to wear a bra under. Apparently, the woman was a fan of sci-fi and it amused Callie, somehow.

"Did you see that? She did a surgery in herself. That's just…"

"Fiction?" Callie new, as a doctor, that performing a surgery in yourself is impossible. Of course, the lady in the movie had a super awesome machine that did that for her. But that machine, at least in the present, was an impossibility in the medical world.

"Well, yeah. But impressive none the less. I think Noomi is so underestimated."

"What else did she do?" Callie didn't remember having watched any movie with this particular actress.

"My point exactly. She just isn't given the brightest characters in what are supposed to be the best movies. Which is a big mistake. This girl, I have to tell you. She would nail any hard core drama you put in front of her. But in another perspective, I'm not really sure if it has to do with her not accepting certain jobs."

"Wow. You're passionate about her, huh?" Callie and Arizona had been to the movies only once. It had been a late night session Callie convinced the blonde to go with her in a random wednesday. It had been just a comedy movie, in which she heard Arizona laugh once or twice. It had been nice, anyways. They spent time together, held hands and occupied their mind with something very light. But now she could see what Arizona's taste in the movie department was. Fiction and hot bad ass woman.

"Her acting, yes." Arizona said nonchalantly, eyes fixed on the TV.

"Really? Don't you just maybe have a liiiittle bit of a crush on her?" Callie teased.

"I'm not confirming that."

"Nor denying it?"

"Okay. Maybe I find her hot. Or maybe it is just because she reminds me of another AMAZING actress." Arizona was now looking at Callie as the movie hit a more slow pace.

"Who would that be?"

"Gillian Anderson."

"The woman from The X Files?" A fiction show, of course.

"That one. Yes."

"Really?"

"Oh, come on, Callie. The X Files is one of the best shows ever. That is true sci-fi. Where it all started. Scully is just one of the best characters out there. And Gillian's acting is marvelous, for the lack of a better word." Arizona was really passionate about this. Definitely not something Callie expected the blonde to be passionate about. Maybe because she wasn't used to the chill state of mind of Arizona. She knew actually very little about her preferences when it involved hobbies and the things she did to have fun or relieve the stress.

"I've watched like two episodes of that TV show. I don't think I can give an opinion about it just yet."

"Haven't you watched The Fall?"

"No?" She was feeling like she was disappointing Arizona somehow.

"Bleak House?"

"No."

"Callie!" Arizona sounded exasperated. Apparently, it was astounding that she haven't ever watched any of those shows. Mental list to have a look at them later.

"I'm not much of a tv show girl. I like movies. The corny cheesy, trash comedy ones." Callie declared, her right hand coming to Arizona's hair, her nails slightly scratching her scalp.

The blonde snuggled closer and rested her head on Callie's shoulder. "Yeah. So that is where that late session of cinema with that really trash comedy came from, huh?"

"Hey there, you laughed." Callie argued.

"Barely."

"But you did. And it was a nice date."

"It was. Because I was with you." Arizona turned her head to look at the brunette, giving her a sweet smile.

"Sweet talker." Callie gave her a peck on the lips. "But don't you like have some kind of guilty pleasure in between all of those movies and tv shows I don't know when you have time to watch?"

"I do. Disney. And I like to watch it every Sunday morning."

"Disney?" Now that was a big surprise for Callie. For all she knew about Arizona, bubbly, dreamy movies were not what she thought the blonde would ever like. It amazed her that she had still so much to get to discover about this woman.

* * *

"Come here!"

Callie called Arizona from the sofa she was laid on. Arizona had gone to the kitchen, carrying the stuff they had brought to snack on earlier. The brunette had already done so much for her today that she had to at least leave her house not letting a big mess for her to clean out latter. She had quickly washed the two glasses they had been drinking wine from and a small tray with cheeses and bread.

"What?" She asked, drying her hands in a kitchen towel.

"Please?" Arizona smiled her way and walked back to her, sitting by Callie's side and taking a strand of hair from her forehead. The brunette took her hand and pulled her so Arizona was lying over her. The smaller body completely melted and molded over Callie's. Feeling a gentle hand rub her back, Arizona sighed deeply and closed her eyes. It was extremely comfy to have the soft body as her mattress and its sweet scent invading her senses. "Hmmm... Did you enjoy the rest of your day?"

"Yes. Thank you, Callie. I really needed this." She really did. Arizona had no idea when had been the last time she had left work so early and just enjoyed the day. She had accepted to be with Callie today without having any idea about what she was preparing. It turned out it was anything but extraordinary, but at the same time, it was everything she hadn't expected to crave so much. A relaxed ride around the city, grocery shopping, a nostalgic videogame session, warm home cooked food, cuddles and a movie on the couch and a glass of wine. And above all of that, the sense of routine and familiarity that it all brought. This, she felt, was just a taste of what being with Callie would be. She did have a little internal freak out moment at the kitchen earlier. She had got overwhelmed by all the possibilities running in her head. And she was trying really hard to think of a way to make it between them really work. She wanted it to work so bad. She just didn't really know how.

"I know."

Arizona felt the vibrations of Callie giggle on her cheek, resting over the other woman's chest. She turned her head so she could look at the brown eyes, her chin resting on her hands now. "Aham… Miss know it all."

"Me? Really, Arizona? I'm the know it all in this relationship?" The brunette laughed, without noticing her use of words. But it somehow didn't faze Arizona as much as it probably would before today. Because if she was being honest, that's how she felt about this too.

So, she moved and supported the weight of her body with her hands, bringing her lips to cover Callie's ones in a lingering peck. "You are amazing! I really loved being here."

"But?"

"But nothing. I just wanted you to know that I appreciate you doing this for me." It was nice to have someone doing stuff for her like that.

"I'm glad you liked it." Callie smiled and pulled her in for another kiss, this one a bit less chaste.

"I think it's time for me to go, though. It's 11pm." Arizona said after their kiss ended. She sat up and watched Callie do the same by her side, straightening her hair up.

"I really hate the idea of you around the city alone at this time at night. With someone you don't even know driving you. Please, let me take you home."

"Callie, it's okay. None of us can drive after that wine."

"I could accompany you in the taxi and then come back." Callie proposed. Arizona wasn't accustomed to people taking care of her like that. Her parents lived far away, her brother had just come back, none of her previous relationship had any interest in doing such things. Except for Julie, maybe. Arizona blocked all of her advances in that department, though. She didn't feel comfortable enough with her to allow that kind of intimacy, the familiarity of a daily basis relationship and interaction. It never felt truly natural. If she was being honest, not even with Callie it was completely natural, even when she had to admit that it was all so much more easier with the brunette. At the same time so much harder. The blonde woman didn't know what her problem was. She couldn't bring herself to open up. Maybe she had become this mechanical person who isn't able to act like a human with real feelings. At least in what relationships concerned. Her entire life it HAD BEEN mechanical. As if the relationship was some kind of obligation. She didn't want it with Callie to be like that. Her mind was one obscure space these last years of her life. And if she wasn't stubborn enough, she could admit that she probably needed some healp in that department. Sometimes it got too hard to be inside her own head. But right here in front of her was Callie, the one who wanted to make her life simple and easier and good.

"It makes no sense at all what you just said."

"Alright. Okay." Callie raised her hands in surrender. Arizona got up the couch and extended her hands to her.

"You think I can borrow your clothes for a day or two?" She didn't feel like changing right now. In fact, she fully intended in getting home and sleeping in the other woman's clothes. It smelled like whatever soap the brunette used to wash it and a hint of her perfume, since they had been cuddling on the couch for a few hours now. It wasn't exactly appropriate to go out with this kind of clothes. But hey, this was LA, and LA in the summer. No one could judge her for wearing shorts and a tank top.

"You can keep it for as long as you want." The brunette's smile was bright as she bent down to give her one more kiss.

Twenty minutes later and Arizona's bag draped over her shoulder, they were still by the door. Saying good bye? A very long good bye, in fact.

"I think you are making this turn in reverse, Dr. Torres."

"What?" Callie questioned from somewhere around the fair neck.

"You are the one now making me miss you before I'm even gone." Arizona closed her eyes and enjoyed the feeling of the other woman's lips over her skin.

"How do you like it?"

"It's mean."

"Well, drink from your own poison, beautiful lady." Callie chuckled and deposited one last kiss on her neck, pulling back to look into her eyes. Arizona gave her a little peck.

"You are something else." She smiled and kissed the latina again. "Talk tomorrow?"

"Absolutely. Text me when you're home, okay?"

"I will." Arizona said and one more kiss was put on the red plump lips.

"Bye." Callie said over her mouth.

"Bye." And again, another kiss was laid on the doctor's lips.

"Bye."

"Bye." Arizona kissed her again, biting her bottom lip playfully.

"Arizona!" Callie chastised in an amused voice.

"What?" The blonde feigned innocence.

"Go. Before I lock this door and throw the key out of the window and you won't be able to leave anymore."

"And that would be a bad idea because…" She raised her eyebrows. This sudden bravery was very funny for the blonde.

"Stop. You are the one big meany, now."

Arizona laughed as she saw Callie pout. "Okay. Bye." And kissed her again, a smacking sound resonating along the sound of the door opening behind her.

"Go." Callie's voice was followed by a slight smack on her butt. She laughed and walked out, looking back and smiling as she saw Callie's amused face.

As she entered the elevator, she rested her head on the wall and closed her eyes. Her feelings were all over the place where this woman was concerned. She knew nothing about anything right at this moment. But she sure wanted to figure this out and pull her shit together. Callie deserved it. She deserved it herself. She wanted to figure out why sometimes it seemed so easy and the other it seemed so impossible. Crazy. Maybe that was it. She was crazy.

" _We'll go dancing in the kitchen_

 _You fall in my arms_

 _Baby won't you let your phone keep ringing_

 _Are you thinking what I'm thinking?_

 _Won't you take your time on me?_

 _I let you figure me out_

 _Tear all my fences down_

 _We've been so tired_

 _Asleep on our feet_

 _Chasing things we'll never keep_

 _Won't you take your time on me?"_

 _(Take Your Time - Vance Joy)_

* * *

 **AN:** Hey, guys! Long time no see. I've been all over the place. Literally! I've been all around three different states, 5 different cities. A LOT has happened in my life the last few months. I traveled to the capital of the country to take an exam, my mom was hospitalized, I had to interrupt my driving classes, I'm about to get official results about passing that exam I traveled for (which I'm almost sure I did well and that would mean that I'll get an official and stable job pretty soon), my little cousin was born and I'm still here taking care of him and my auntie. I have another exam this weekend, a graduation party at the beginning of august and some doctor's appointments to go and labs to do and just after that my life should go back to a normal, back with my driving classes so I can finally have a license. And I still have to write a scientific article and a project. A lot of stuff, so bear with me. Anyways… How have you all been. Who liked the world cup result? If I have any French people reading me here, I want to say "Congratulations, guys. Your team really deserved it." I'm sorry for the English people who wanted it so bad to come home. I have to say, though, the next one is ours." It will be 20 years since we won a world cup; the next one has to be ours. Haha Anyways, what do you think about this chapter? I'm not entirely happy with it. But I think it was somehow necessary. Next chapter we will have a small time jump and a liiiiittle bit of drama. Stay tuned and the chapter after that may be just what you are waiting for. Thank you all for staying with me and… Please, leave your review. It is very very important. Sorry for all the mistakes. They are all mine.


	14. Chapter 14: Not so happy birthday

**Chapter 14: Not so happy Birthday**

" _I'm only honest when it rains_

 _If I time it right, the thunder breaks_

 _When I open my mouth_

 _I want to tell you but I don't know how…"_

The universe was a funny player, Callie thought, bringing the glass she was holding to her lips while looking around the crowded living room. There were a lot of hot guys here, she had to confess. Strong arms and incredibly toned asses walking confidently everywhere. Many of them were accompanied by very beautiful ladies, probably long term girlfriends. Other's had a clear arm candy, with whom they would be going to enjoy a night to remember later.

Autumn fast approached LA, but being the sunny place it was, the city was pretty warm still. The pool outside was buzzing with loud voices and people in bikinis. This sure wasn't the kind of event she was used to attending nowadays. It was nice, though. People were full of energy and joy. It was Tim's birthday. And what was not there to celebrate? More than never, in fact. He was permanently back home, alive and healthy. Married to the woman he loved, living in their new house near the beach. A new life was beginning for him. And the feeling around this place today was refreshing.

She swoon the glass around twice and drank from it again. A sangria with lots of ice. It was good! As good as she remembered drinking in Miami a few months ago. She had to admit she was drinking a little too fast. But who would have blamed her? When even with all the hot army men here this early afternoon, her head was occupied by the sister of one of the men in the army. She laughed at herself. More so because of how pathetic she was.

She had not talked to Arizona in the last 5 days. And today, that would probably change. At any time. When the blonde walked through the door. It left her feeling anxious and sad. Part of her was eager to speak to the other woman and the other part was dreading it. In those 5 days, things were left completely uncertain. Not that anything between them was ever really clear. They went from talking every day and having one and other night together to being strangers in a matter of less than a week. The blonde had not taken her calls, nor answered her messages. And once and for all, Callie refused to humiliate herself in a relationship again. She simply stopped calling. No more texts. The last time she tried to get any response from Arizona was three days ago.

And now, here she was, battling her inner thoughts of running away from any heartache she knew she was bound to suffer tonight. She was initially very apprehensive about coming. But she needed some kind of answer and she needed to put an end to any of her expectations. Actually, the pressure of trying to not have expectations was worse than actually letting herself expect something more with Arizona. So, she came. And she had the impossible mission of being really indifferent. Which she knew was sure to result in some very passive aggressive behavior coming from her.

Turning around, she pulled away from the window overlooking the pool and walked to where Teddy was standing, talking to Tim and some other guys. The blonde surgeon was in the army not long ago, so this was basically her element. Not so much Callie's, but what else was she supposed to do here but engage in conversations with strangers? She wanted to be able to say that they were all very deep and intriguing men. Serious and intelligent. She was wrong, though. Maybe because these were the fresh babies. The ones which souls had not yet been damaged by the horrifying things human beings can do to another. They had not yet been forced to be away from their family, in literally battlefields, with constant danger hovering over their head. They were light, full of passion for the country. Innocent. She could even call some of them to be naïve. These were Tim's soldiers. The ones he had just started training. She was as proud of that as she was sad about it. She had no doubt they would turn out to be amazing at what they did. As she had no doubt that at least a few of them wouldn't completely return home. In the literal or figurative way.

Jake, this really cute redhead kid – yes, he was a kid, at his 19 years old – was telling them all really bad jokes. And everyone was truly laughing at how ridiculously bad at it he was. It was cute. He seemed like a really sweet guy. Half way through another really scrunching nose joke, a blonde head caught Callie's attention. Arizona had arrived. Her lean form floating through the door in what was probably the most revealing piece of clothing she had ever seen the small body wearing! There was no denying her increasing heart rate due to the length of Arizona's white shorts. Smooth legs showing their glory, covered in small brown dots of what she was sure to be the most beautiful marks a person could have. She remembered those were on the blondes arms too. With not much more time to process anything about the other woman for now, she took a deep breath as the blonde got closer and approach them.

"Callie, what are you doing here?" Arizona asked. Her face was covered by surprise and confusion. Maybe a little bit of angst. She couldn't really point it out. It made her feel even more pathetic. And she laughed. She actually laughed at Arizona, sarcastically.

"Uh, Tim invited me?" Callie offered, with a smile. Everyone in their little group was watching the interaction intently.

"Oh, he did, did he?" Arizona looked at Tim questioningly. He looked straight back at her, his face serious.

"Yes." Callie confirmed and took one last sip on her sangria. Her glass was now empty. And she truly lamented the fact. Arizona's face fell and she took a deep breath and looked away for a second, her hands instantly coming to the back of her shorts, in her pockets.

"Callie, I'm sorry." Arizona offered. Callie didn't think it was all that sincere, though. And because of that, she just smiled again. It seemed her mouth had a desire of its own.

"Hey, it's not your birthday. It was not up to you to invite me." It was true. This was not really about an invitation to a birthday that wasn't even Arizona's.

"But I…" The blonde started, taking a step closer.

"You don't need to worry about it, Arizona." Callie interrupted and took a step back. Raising her glass, she gave the only excuse she could find to avoid this for a little longer. "Well, I'll go get myself something to drink." And walked away. Being close to Arizona was dangerous. It was like half of her strength walked out the door and she was left with only an ounce of courage to do what she knew deep down she had to. Maybe drinking wasn't going to give her strength back right now. It could make things even worse. She needed space, though.

"You truly are an idiot, Arizona." Tim said not so subtly.

"Why didn't you tell me you invited her?" At this point, the people with them started to dissipate. Only Teddy and Tim remained.

"Why didn't you invite her first?" Tim's sister needed a wakeup call. "Seriously. I called her yesterday to talk to Teddy, because she was not answering her phone, and I thought that maybe Callie could get a hold of her for me. And I asked her if she was coming today. She had no idea what today was."

"I didn't even know if I was coming, Tim."

"You weren't coming to my birthday? Wow. Yeah, you are a total jerk." Tim was hurt. And angry. And when he walked away from her, followed right behind by Teddy, who sported a very disapproving look, she knew that she had just let three of her people down. Today was definitely not going to end up well. She wanted to walk through the door again, making her way out. However, walking out of the place wouldn't mean walking out of the situation.

* * *

Half an hour had passed since Arizona had arrived. Callie had put on a brave face, gotten herself another drink and was now talking to Emily, who had sensed the tension after their little encounter from afar and was in a clear attempt of making things less awkward. Ordinary subjects were being discussed, such as the decoration of the house, the food being served, the weather. Callie wanted to go home. But she had to leave here today with things clear between her and Arizona. How that would come to be, she didn't know.

"Callie, dear, how good to see you. How are you?" Callie heard Mrs Robbins voice behind her and turned around to see the sweet face smiling at her. The Colonel was right behind her, both of his hands resting on her shoulders. She didn't see them arriving. She didn't even know they would be here, coming all the way from Boston. It shouldn't be all that surprising, though.

"Hi, Mrs Robbins. I'm good. What about you?" Callie smiled back sincerely.

"Oh, I've told you. None of that Mrs Robbins thing. You call me Barbara. And I'm very good. Tim made us travel all the way here for his birthday. Not that we wouldn't want to be here for his first birthday after coming back from deployment. But you know, we are getting old." The older woman laughed and Callie couldn't hope but chuckle. Arizona's mom was probably the most adorable mother out there. She was calm, collected, elegant, sweet. But fierce, full of her own opinions and made herself be heard. A woman needed that to be married to the Colonel for that long, she had heard.

"You look as fine as a rose, Barbara. I'm sure you have more energy than I do."

"She does have a lot of energy." The Colonel chimed in. "I have to yell at her to sit her little butt for a minute. She spends the whole day cooking and gardening. It's a bit maddening. How are you, Dr. Torres?" The serious man extended his hand to her. This was the third time she met the married couple. They had always been very polite. She wondered if they knew the nature of the relationship she had with their youngest. The latina had always been presented as a friend. At Tim's wedding they had a very intimate moment on the dance floor. That could have easily given them away.

"I don't doubt that." They shared a laugh. "Hello, Sir. I'm just fine. How are you?"

"I'm good. Where is my daughter? I presume you're here with her?" The man looked around, his eyes searching for his blonde daughter. Oh, well. How to answer to that?

"I'm sorry, Sir. But it was actually Tim who invited me. Arizona is here, though. I saw her a few minutes ago going in the direction of what I think is the kitchen." Being sincere was always the right thing to do, she thought. And what she said didn't really give away what had been happening between them.

"Well, I should go talk to her. It was nice seeing you, Dr. Torres." He excused himself with a smile and walked away from them after squeezing Barbara's arms.

"You didn't come with Arizona?" Mothers. They were nosy and inappropriate. It was not past the older Robbins woman to be just a little bit like that too. She was clearly interested in whatever weirdness she had picked up in the air from Callie's words. Right there she knew that yes, Barbara definitely knew Callie was not just a friend of her daughter. Not because Arizona had opened up to her. She was sure that was not the case. It was simply because Barbara knew her daughter well.

"No. I'm afraid she was too busy lately. I was told by her a week ago that this week would be a hectic one. She was having some important visitors or something like that." Callie gave the only answer she could give in this situation. She was not here to make accusations against Arizona. She didn't have that right.

"Well..." Barbara started, shaking her head one side to another and giving a step back. "If you can excuse me, Callie. We can talk more later?" The older woman said apologetically. She was a woman on a mission, apparently. Arizona was soon to receive some truthful words from her mother and Callie chastised herself for saying anything. But lying was not an option. What else was she supposed to say?

"Absolutely."

* * *

Callie had managed to avoid Arizona for a good hour. She didn't know if she was proud of herself for handling that or ashamed of herself for how she handled it. She was hoping Arizona would come find her at some point. It didn't happen and it made her feel worse. At some point she had left the inside of the house and came to the backyard. Far from Arizona, further from the noise at the pool area. There was this small space at the end of the backyard with a white fence. She could see the beach and the waves of the ocean on the horizon. This place was so beautiful. It paid the price of living outside the busy city. This here was peaceful, with the sun about to set and the sky starting to get a little bit of orange on it.

"Hey." The small voice startled her and she took a deep breath before turning around.

"Hey." She gave Arizona a small smile and waited for the blonde to say something else. Inside, she felt like she was giving Arizona a chance to explain herself and to set the pace of this conversation. Passive aggressive hadn't really worked out. She knew it wouldn't, but she hadn't been able to control her impetuosity.

"Why are you here by yourself?" Arizona was hesitant, almost afraid of talking and that didn't make Callie feel any better. She didn't want to make Arizona feel that way. She could be a total selfish bitch here if she wanted. The blonde with no doubt had given her a few reasons for her to do so. But she didn't find herself able to ever be selfish where Arizona was concerned. There was this pull inside Callie every time she thought, heard or was near the blonde.

"Uh. I'm just enjoying the quiet. And the fresh wind coming from the beach." It was true, but not the entire truth.

"Can we talk?" Arizona's eyes were dull, acquiring a grey tone she hadn't seen before.

"Why? You didn't even want me here in the first place, Arizona." Callie knew she was being harsh. Her tone was not aggressive, but cold. And indifference, even if forced indifference, could hurt more than hostility.

"You are mad." The woman lamented.

"I'm not mad, Arizona. I'm… hurt." What was worse? To feel angry or to feel hurt? Callie had been genuinely optimist when this all started. Arizona had told her that she would get hurt at one point or another if they tried to do this. She completely ignored that. Not because she thought it would never happen, because in any relationship you end up hurting one another inevitably at some point. She ignored it because she believed Arizona would be worth it. More than any other person she was with before. Somehow, even in the beginning, she was sure that Arizona was not the kind of woman who played with other people feelings. And she knew, as much as the sun would rise tomorrow, that this woman was not here trying to fool her. The blonde was lost. Lost in the perspective of dealing with her feelings for the latina.

"I'm sorry."

"It's okay." Callie simply said. In fact, Arizona was forgiven as soon as the realization of what Callie needed to do now came to her mind.

"I didn't know if I was coming today. I had wo…"

"Work to do. I know. Don't worry." Predictable excuse.

"Callie…" The blonde started, but didn't seem to find words to finish.

"Arizona… Technically, we are… nothing. I mean, nothing that would completely justify you having the obligation of inviting me to Tim's birthday. This is not about you not inviting me to come with you to your brother's party. You know that, don't you?"

"I know. I really am sorry, Callie." Callie could see she was being sincere. Her lips opened and closed a pair of time, clearly showing she wanted to say something but was struggling with it.

"Look, it is okay if you need a little space. I can understand that. But it would have been nice to warn me about it. Not just let me hanging."

"It's getting harder and harder to concentrate when all I can think about all day is you." The blonde blurted out, surprising Callie completely. She gave the woman a smile and came closer to her, bringing her right hand to a pale cheek and caressing it with her thumb.

"That is… sweet. You should have just told me that before." She watched as Arizona turned her face seeking for more contact with her cold hand. "But, Arizona, it's been almost four months since we started dating and… The reason why our relationship is not progressing is not your work. It is you." She pulled her hand back from the smooth skin and took the blonde's hand instead. The intimacy of touching the woman's face was starting to feel too much for Callie right now.

"I'm tired. Because I can understand your work and I can try and understand why YOU don't let us go any further. But I can't continue going on blind. If you don't tell me what is happening inside your head I won't be able to understand you and then I won't be able to continue this how it is going."

"Callie…"

"You are being difficult. We are making this more difficult than it has to be. That is the truth. I don't have a clue about why. Why can't it just be simple? Why is it so hard for you? I'm not married with a kid. I'm not confused about my sexuality. I'm not… sick with a terminal disease. I'm not after your money. I have my own money. And a career. I'm independent and I like to believe that I'm strong. I don't want to control you, do dictate your life. And you? You are almost perfect, Arizona. So, truthfully, I don't know what makes it so difficult. Unless it is because you don't like me. And that is not the case. I'm not trying to be presumptuous. It is what it is. You look at me and I feel it. You hug me and I feel it. You moan my name and I feel it. I'm falling in love with you, Arizona. Hell, I'm IN love with you since the very beginning. And I'm trying to love you. The right way, you know?" Callie stopped for a moment to take a breath. Arizona was paralyzed in front of her. She knew it was probably too much to take in. Saying all that was not part of the initial plan and she could relate to the blonde in this moment. She was sure starting to get very self-conscious of her declarations. And if she didn't finish what she had to say now. She probably wouldn't anymore. "You won't completely let me. And unless you tell me what your feelings and insecurities are, I won't be able to understand you. If we keep going this way, I'll end up in a shit hole crying my eyes out while you will be burying yourself even more into work and in a few weeks it will be like none of this even happened to you. Because that is how you are used to live. Alone and working. But that is not how I live my life. I need love. And I was hopeful that I would find that with you because you are… Truly magnificent! But if you are not ready for it, maybe I need to move on. Sooner rather than later." Silence. Arizona's eyes were glistening with the beginning of a cry Callie was not strong enough to be here to see. So she released the blonde's hand. She needed to go. It wouldn't make Arizona any good to see the tears Callie was sure to shed too, as soon as she entered her car.

"Callie, I…"

"When you're ready, if you ever will be, you know where to find me." Callie wanted to kiss her lips, the soft flesh which never failed to make her dream of a bright future. However, it wouldn't be appropriate to toy with their feelings like that. She settled to a light peck on the cheek. "Take care, okay?"

* * *

"Hey, what are you doing here? In the ER none the less? I thought you were only coming tomorrow."

Callie had come home from Tim's birthday and begged Cristina to come cover the pit for her tonight. Luckily, her roommate was not feeling very well. It was a win win situation. She needed to clear her head completely from the thought of a blonde headed business woman.

"Don't ask." Callie put the pile of charts on the ER station and sighed heavily.

"I already did. Come on…"

Okay. Three minor ortho patients who could wait, the heart attack guy had just gone to surgery with Owen and the other two went for scans. Now she had the girl in box three to check out. Even thought she was almost sure what all that vomiting meant. And…

"You know I won't let you alone until you tell me, right?" She took her eyes from the charts and looked at Mark annoyingly. So much for forgetting the events of today.

"I'm just trying to occupy my head. What is better for that than an ER shift?" The brunette shrugged and took the chart from the girl who was probably pregnant on her hands. She walked out, noticing impatiently how Mark was following her.

"Blondie is making you suffer again?"

"She doesn't make me suffer."

"Bullshit. Keep telling yourself that and you will end up being an old lady who dates someone once a week. No ring, no kids, no true love, no commitment, no nothing."

"You are describing your biggest dream, right there." Callie chuckled.

"You are wrong. I want little Grey in my bed every night, with two big golden rings on her left hand, while our ten kids cry on the monitors around us."

The latina had to stop her walk and look at him. Aparently he was serious about that. That was when she laughed. "You are just a bit delirious, huh?"

"What? I want to be better for her. I… I actually just asked her to be my girlfriend yesterday." Callie's eyes bulged. And for a just a few millisecond she was jealous of him. Of his courage. Or of his lack of sensibility. She had wanted she had just asked Arizona to be her girlfriend so many times.

"Seriously?"

"Yeah." He said and looked out, his eyes then fixating on something to her left. Callie followed his eyes to see that Lexie was in fact on shift today too. She was talking with a nurse and showing her something on a chart. She smiled at the nurse and walked out.

"What did she say?" Callie asked, looking back at him, but already knowing the answer for that.

"She said no." He smiled sadly.

"At least she tells you that to your face and doesn't lead you on."

"My feelings are already hurt. Don't play with them even more, Torres."

"Did she say anything about why?"

"She said I was not boyfriend material. That she was sure the first fight we had I would get in my car and end up in a striper club fucking every lady I found there. Or I would get the first nurse who would be willing to shake bones with me and take her in an on call room."

Callie could see her point. And the young intern was right. She knew Lexie liked him, a lot. But true to his nature, Mark truly wasn't boyfriend material. At this point, she couldn't really see him being different from what he was. He was an amazing friend. There was no denying that. But his major brain, located on his penis, always overpowered his actual brain, the one in his head.

"That is a very accurate description of what you would do. I'm with her on that."

"Have you stopped to think that I may really like her, Torres?" Mark sounded so sure. She wanted this to be something good for him. And she wanted it to work. He would have to make a much better job at being a truly decent guy, though.

"You do?"

"I do."

"Then prove it to her. And think seriously about the fact that if you really like her and you guys are in a relationship she should be the only woman you will ever have sex with. Not out of obligation, but because you want it to be that way. You want her to be the only woman you will ever touch forever. When you think about it and realize that that is what you want, then you will be ready to prove to her. Are you ready to prove it right now?" It may be hash to break those news to him like that. But well, Mark needed to grow up in the relationship department. And when he said nothing to respond to that. She knew she was right. He was not ready to be what Lexie needed. What a woman needed out a a serious relationship. "That's what I thought."

"I'll be ready soon enough."

She smiled and patted him on his shoulder, walking away and to the pregnant girl.

"What is it with blondie this time?" Oh, sweet Jesus.

"Apart from ignoring me for almost a week, her brothers party was today and I had no idea. He invited me and when she got there and saw me she just asked me what I was doing there."

"Ouch." Ouch was exactly what it felt like. Except maybe a little worse than that.

"So,I basically told her that I was in love with her and that I couldn't continue what we had if it was going to be this way. I left after telling her that she knew where to find me when and if she felt like she was ready for a real relationship."

"Wow." He was surprised. And she understood why. That was not like her. To have that kind of initiative towards someone she was clearly in love with. "You did the right thing, Torres."

She stopped in front of the box three and turned to look at Mark before going back to her duties.

"Did I? I don't feel good about it." She confessed. Part of her was proud, the other part of her was already missing the sporadic nights of cuddling and kissing, the adventurous dates Arizona always seemed to come up with, the little mindful surprises, the blonde's eyes. And smile.

"Callie, you deserve better than a relationship in which you have no idea where you are going. It's time for you to be the one loved, for once."

"I'm afraid she will never come to me, though. And it hurts, Mark."

"It will be her loss entirely, Cal." His hand came to caress her cheek for just a second, sliding through her arm in comfort.

"She is a lot to lose too, you know? But then again, I didn't really have her." The truth of that sentence made her hurt a little deeper. But deciding it was enough for today, she opened the curtains of the box and got in. "Hi. My name is Dr. Torres and I'll be the one helping you today."

" _I'm only honest when it rains_

 _An open book with a torn out page_

 _And my ink's run out_

 _I want to love you but I don't know how."_

 _(Neptune – Sleeping at last)_

* * *

 **AN:** Oh, guys. You have no idea the turn of events my life has been. It seems I can't get peace of mind for long enough to actually feel like I'm at peace. I don't want get into too much details of things. But it has a lot of family and health involved and it all sucks big time. No, it was not lack of time that made me take so long to upload, it was the lack of disposition. My mind was just not in the right place to write. Anyways. Here is one more chapter. Don't worry. You are about to get what you have been waiting since the beginning. There is this saying about things getting worse before getting better or something like that, right? Well, that is the case here. Hit me with your reviews, please. I wanna hear it all. Sorry for all the mistakes. I didn't proof read any of it. So, please, forgive me.


	15. Chapter 15: Let me love you

**Chapter** **15:** **Let me love you**

 _"So I tried to forget it_  
 _That was all part of the show_  
 _Told myself I'd regret it_  
 _But what do I know?_

 _About all these useless dreams of living alone_  
 _Like a dogless bone [...]"_

More than two weeks had come and gone and every day seemed to be exactly the same for Callie. Work, research and in some rare occasions home. Off days were spent basically sleeping. She got drunk once at Joe's a few days ago. That was it. What she was now calling life. There was not much to complain, if she was honest. Nothing much to be excited about either. And that was the sad part. Having no expectations in life. Nothing to look forward to. Life was not always exciting, though. For anyone.

"Dr. Torres!" Callie heard someone calling when she turned from the nurse's station to head to the locker room and change to go home. She turned around and saw Teddy walking by, stopping beside her.

"Teddy, hi." She gave her a smile and continued walking.

"What's up? I haven't seen you at all this week." The blonde doctor casually commented as she walked beside her.

"May that be because we work in different wards?" Callie chuckled.

"Is that the right way to treat an attending, Dr. Torres?" Teddy feigned annoyance, to what they both laughed.

"I'm good. What about you? Many broken hearts to fix?"

Teddy laughed ironically. "Mine, mostly." Oh, yeah. That was not the right thing to ask Teddy at the moment. She couldn't really imagine what Teddy was going through right now. Of course it didn't compare to what Owen and Cristina were both feeling. But it was still bad. How is one supposed to feel when the man you have feelings for and one of your best friends is in pain because his girlfriend just terminated a pregnancy of a baby he really wanted to have?

"That bad, huh?" Callie stopped in a quiet part of the ortho ward hall and looked straight at her work friend with a sad smile.

"Worse."

"I know. You guys are all in a difficult situation."

"Does everybody know about it?"

"You know how this place is. But that's not how I know. Cristina lives with me. I saw all the puke, the before procedure crying and the after procedure crying. She doesn't spend time with him anymore. Not for now, at least." Everyone knew Callie and Cristina were roommates. They were… friends. In a really different, weird way. But friends, nonetheless. And even though she wanted to help Teddy, she couldn't really comment on her friends' life like that. It would be inappropriate.

"I'm torn. He… He is not dealing very well with it and I can't really help more than I already am. He doesn't love me. He loves her and…"

"I understand. But it's not completely true that he doesn't love you, Teddy." Owen was definitely in love with Cristina. The fact was… it was also totally clear how he saw Teddy with another eyes. He looked at her in a way that meant more than friendship. She could see his conflict every time the three of them were in the same room.

"I know. But it's different."

"I know it wouldn't be easy, but maybe you should extract yourself from the situation. It won't make you any good to keep getting closer to be rejected down the line, when we both know they will be together again." It could sound rash to say something like that. But Callie knew. Teddy was here for months. Callie had been here for a couple years, watching Cristina and Owen's relationship develop. "Cristina and Owen… They're… one another's. I don't see it changing. Not if it is up to him, at least. Because if it is up to Cristina… We never really know what her actions will be." Cristina was just… Cristina. And to the woman, no one would ever be more important in her life than herself. If you think about it, there is nothing really wrong with that. All of the contrary. One should not leave a life they don't want to because of another person.

"Are you taking your own advice on that subject?" Teddy asked turning the object on the conversation around completely. It took Callie a minute to understand what she was in fact questioning. When she realized what it was about, she didn't really know what she was supposed to answer. "She told me about it all. Well, I forced it out of her that day when I saw you leaving the party early."

No. She wasn't extracting herself from her situation with Arizona. She all but threw at her the complete true about the nature of her feelings. She showed the right side of her face for Arizona to slap. And each and every day of the last two weeks in which the blonde hadn't contacted her had felt like the blonde had done just that. Slapped her face repeatedly. "She knows what I want, Teddy. She only needs to figure out what 'she' wants. I'm prone to endure almost anything with her. As long as it truly is "with her".

* * *

"What is it you are listening to?" Asked Alex from the door of Arizona's office. The blonde didn't bother to chastise him. It had been years and he never learned how to knock. She was past the point of getting upset about that.

"Yann Tiersen. Helps me to concentrate." She said, not taking her eyes from the computer in front of her.

"You're weird." Alex declared sitting on the chair in front of her table.

"What is weird about instrumental songs helping with concentration? There are even studies about it."

"Anyways…" He shrugged off. "I came to say that everything is finished. The most important content was already sent to the clients, Mr. Newman has finished all of this month's balance, everyone was paid for their services. The smaller things will be handled by me in the next few weeks and I'll call you if anything needs to be done and I can't do it myself. You can go as soon as friday." End of the month could be quite hectic at the company. Add to that a business trip and everyone could end up going crazy. It had been so long since she had last taken a trip for work. Nowadays, people would come to her. This was a special occasion, though, and she wanted the deal for personal reasons.

"Okay."

"Who will you be taking with you?"

"Hmpf…" Normally, Julie would come with her. She was her assistant after all. That fact brough back memories Arizona was not quite sure she enjoyed. Truth was, her relationship with Julie was strictly professional these days. She knew nothing about the other woman's life outside the walls of VOX. As much as she was relieved by that. She was also sad. Julie used to be a good friend. A great friend in who she confided many times in the past. It had been ruined, though. Arizona didn't know how to fix it. Or even if she wanted to. It was confusing.

"Julie? You will be taking Julie with you?"

"No. No… I thought about it, but..."

"Don't go there again, Arizona." He warned. It wasn't needed, though. Because even if Julie ended up going with her, there was no chance of anything sexual ever happening between them again.

"I'm not. That's why I'm not taking Julie with me. Barbara is coming. The rest of the people will go next week if they sign with us." Arizona rested her back on her chair and sighed. She really wanted them to sign with her. At this point of her career she usually didn't feel as threatened by competition. This contract, though, was something she really held close to her heart. It involved the LGBT community and she felt like she had an obligation towards it. A moral duty. Also, it would be a way of helping, since this was a case a philanthropy. She basically had to make a whole campaign for a cosmetics company. They were launching a makeup collection entirely based on the diversity flags. 80% percent of all the profit would be donated to institutions supporting the community. Her services would be done free of charge.

"Do you think there is a chance that they don't?" Alex scratched the beard starting to grow on his chin as she asked. He had seen the content she had prepared for this campaign. It was truly impressive.

"There is always a chance. But I'm confident. This is more of a formality I think." Benjamin Cox had personally called her about the content she had already sent to them last week. There was only one other company who would present to them in the next days. He had some really nice comments about what she had planned though. So, she hoped his personal call was an indication that she didn't have to worry about.

"It's been a long time since you've done something like this."

"Right?" She smiled. It was actually nice to remember the old times. She used to travel at least every other week to try and get some contracts in other states, when she was starting business and needed more clients. "I was so used to do it when we started. I needed contracts. Nowadays I only do this kind of stuff when I really like what the company is asking for, their message and stuff. It's for a nice cause."

"I know." Working closely with Arizona for several years made Alex aware of the meaning working with social causes had for Arizona. She liked helping people. "I think this little trip to New York will make you good." He commented and observed her reaction. His friend needed a break from everything. Something she would never really consider. But a trip to New York would help a little with the relaxing and having fun, bit. It was work related, sure. She would not be working the entire time, however.

"I'm fine, Karev. Don't worry." She brushed him off, taking his eyes from him and getting her attention back to the computer in a clear dismissive way. He was not needed anymore.

"Alright, okay." Karev stood up an got out. Maybe when she came back, they could talk a bit more about everything. He was never one for intimate talks and personal business, but Arizona was the closest friend he had, besides his wife.

* * *

This was not what Teddy intended to be doing in a wednesday night. Arizona had called her to hang out. Despite how unusual the invitation was, Teddy agreed. She indeed needed some distraction from the last events in her life. Stuck with lame music playing on the back ground and a friend who was clearly very conflicted with whatever it was disturbing her mind, she doubted it had been a good decision to come. At least the wine was good. "Can we please change these songs, Arizona?"

"NO." After an hour of talking nonsense and drinking wine, the blonde's voice was heavy and loud.

"Why are you listening to this, anyway?" Teddy knew Arizona liked her piano solos. It wasn't often that she listened to them, though. And she never listened to them when there were other people with her.

"Helps me concentrate."

"You don't need to concentrate while drinking."

"Teddy, just shut up and drink." Though the words seemed harsh, her tone was almost indifferent.

"What is your problem, really? I mean you basically invited me to get drunk at your house in a wednesday night." Teddy knew what Arizona's problem was. She was hurting because of Callie even though it made no sense at all. The woman beside her was being stupid and naïve. Completely stubborn. Selfish, even.

"Nothing. I have a total of ZERO problems in my life. You see, it's easy to be me." Voice lower now, Arizona put her empty glass on the coffee table and stared at the wall in front of her. She felt bad. For so many reasons. For inviting Teddy here and subjecting her friend to her own grumpy mood. For how she had handled everything in her personal life in the last month. For how she had just left Callie leave Tim's party. And how she didn't call her for two weeks now. For how she couldn't get past the nauseating feeling every time she thought about getting into a relationship. She had no idea why she was so reluctant in letting it happen. The time she spent with Callie was truly the most liberating moments she had in the last four years.

"Don't be an idiot, Arizona."

"How is she?" Arizona ignored Teddy's comment. It was a fact she was acting like an idiot.

"You should ask her yourself if you are really that interested." Teddy snapped, anger present in her voice.

"Teddy…"

"You know what, Arizona? Sometimes you are an egocentric, selfish person who can't see past your own nose. You are stupid and childish and really really up-tight."

"Really, Teddy?" Arizona questioned in disapproval, not entirely annoyed.

"You think your love life or the lack of it is so complicated and, oh my God, it is so hard to love someone, I work too much and bla bla bla..." It was a backlash of words, while angry hands pointed and danced around. "But really, try being in love with your best friend from war who has now a girlfriend who is your resident at the hospital you work at and just had an abortion with the child of said friend who you love for god knows how many years. And now try being in love with him while trying to suppress your feelings to help him get over the fact that the child he so wanted to have, but not with you, is now in some hospital garbage and the woman he truly loves doesn't talk to him because she didn't want a child and it was her right as a woman to have it or not." Where there was anger before, now there was such a raw emotion. Teddy's voice was laced with sorrow, her eyes shining with tears.

"Oh, Teddy…" Arizona lamented, getting closer to her friend on the floor of her living room, where they had been sitting. She put a hand on her shoulder and squeezed, trying to convey some comfort.

"Cristina aborted hers and Owen's child and he is… desolate. And I'm… I'm so…" Teddy couldn't finish as she started sobbing.

"Hey. Hey… Come here." Arizona hugged her. It was true, she had been egocentric and selfish and so so stupid.

"I don't know what to do." The blonde surgeon declared as she collected some air in her lungs.

"And I don't really know what to say." Arizona pulled out from their hug. "Maybe you should take some time to yourself. I don't know. Take a week off. Come with me to New York maybe?" She suggested. It was spontaneous and nothing like anything Arizona was used to do. But maybe time with her friend in New York would be good for the booth of them.

Teddy thought for a minute and nodded in agreement. "I'm sorry for what I said."

"Don't be. You are right."

"Callie is right there and she is in love with you, Arizona. And I know you are in love with her."

She was. "I am."

"There is truly nothing keeping you apart but your stubbornness. And it pisses me off to the core." It pissed Arizona off too. Maybe she should pay someone a visit before going to New York.

* * *

Callie was in a hurry walking through the hall to get changed and scrub in an emergency surgery. Hopefully she would be able to go home after. She was suposed to go home na hour ago, but this man came through the doors in a really bad shape and she was called. She had to get some water on her face and maybe na intern could get her a coffee to drink before the surgery started. She needed to be awake and focused after a night of no sleep for inumerous reasons.

"Arizona?" She stopped walking watching Arizona turn around from the nurses' station of the ortho ward as she heard her name. What was she doing here? Callie's heart instantly started beating faster. She wasn't expecting this at all. There was no indicaition of why the blonde was here. She could have come visit Teddy, acompany Julie on one of her final check ups. Or someone could be injured. Oh God. Who was injured?

"Hey…" Arizona's voice was aprehensive and small, clearly suprised too, by the sudden approach.

"Is everything okay? Are you okay? Your family?" She watched as confusion crossed Arizona's face.

"No. I'm fine. We're all fine." She finally responded when she seemed to understand what the latina had asked and why. The pink lips turned in to a light smile, the skin on the right side of her cheek dipping just a little bit and not helping at all in the matter of trying to calm Callie's wild heart.

"Oh, okay. I'm glad. Well, I should go." The brunette smiled back. She knew the smile didn't reach her own eyes. She was more nervous than excited to see the other woman. Mostly because she wasn't expecting it. But also because she had no idea of what this little visit meant. If she was honest enough, she didn't really think she wanted to find out. She didn't want to have any expectations. So, she turned to leave. Only to feel a soft but firm hand hold her by the wrist.

"Callie, wait." Arizona pleaded. Callie turned back to look at her, but said nothing. What was she supposed to say? "Can we talk?" The woman she had declared her love to weeks ago wanted to talk.

"I'm actually late for an emergency surgery." Callie was suddenly very grateful for that emergency surgery. She was not ready for a conversation with Arizona. Much less this unexpectedly.

"Oh. Alright. I can wait." The blonde seemed disappointed but determined to be heard, whatever it was she had to say.

"I don't know how long I'll be, Arizona." It felt strange to have Arizona waiting for her as the woman was always so busy. It was thursday morning, a week day.

"I have my laptop with me. I can work from the cafeteria. I really want to talk." As Callie pondered the situation, a pale hand still holding her wrist in a firm grip, she sighed. Her eyes went to were their bodies were touching and felt the grip get loose and then her wrist was released. "Please?" At the sound of Arizona insistent request, Callie looked back at her. How was it possible to be this affected by someone? The blue eyes were clouded, she noticed. The crease between her eyebrows deeper. Her lips slightly parted as the woman waited for her response.

"I'll come find you when I'm done." It was all she could say, not trusting herself to articulate anything more. She walked out and went to scrub in. A surgery was exactly what she needed right now.

* * *

"Hey. I'm sorry it took so long." Callie had finished surgery 15 minutes ago. She had scrubbed out and and talked to the other surgeon about the patient's situation. When she walked into the cafeteria she stopped at the entrance as she saw Arizona. She had her glasses on, eyes trailing the computer with a very concentrated face. The brunette had watched her for a moment before finally gathering the courage to come to her.

Arizona instantly looked up. She gave her a sweet smile and took her glasses off, hanging it on the cleavage of her beige blouse. She closed the laptop and sat straighter on the chair. "It's alright. I kept myself busy. Everything good with the patient?"

"Yeah. He fell from the second floor while working. He builds houses. 6 broken bones. All fixed now." The surgeon was still standing, debating if she should sit too. Sitting would give it the intention of a longer talk. Was she ready for a long talk with Arizona? Was this place even appropriate for a serious conversation? She didn't know what Arizona wanted to talk about. Of course, she suspected it had to do with the both of them. About the day of Tim's birthday.

"Wow. That's intense."

"Yeah. He will be fine, though." Silence took over. Callie avoided looking at Arizona's face, fixing her eyes on anything and nothing around the cafeteria. The blonde didn't find it in her to start talking, though. When Callie looked back, Arizona's gaze was on her, observantly. It burned Callie's skin. It burned her inside. "Uh. Did you want to talk?"

"Yeah. Uh…" The brunette saw Arizona hesitate and look at her hands. She sighed and looked back at Callie, locking their eyes together. "I think there is no better way of saying what I came to say so I'll just… I have really no excuse for what I did, Callie. I was a coward. I panicked and…"

"Did I do anything wrong? Because I don't remember…"

"No, Callie. No. You were perfect. You are perfect. I... I've missed you so much." Arizona's voice cracked. Callie could see her cheeks and nose getting red, a clear indication of her emotional state. It made Callie angry, for whatever reason.

"You didn't miss me that much the week before." It was selfish of the brunette to think like that. But it was easy to miss someone when you were the one left behind. It was not granted to miss them when you were the one responsible for the distance between each other. She wondered how much Arizona had missed her the entire week she had choose to ignore the latina.

"That's not true." Arizona shook her head.

"But that was what you made me think with your actions, Arizona. You at least knew what was happening. I had no idea why the hell you hadn't even answered my texts for days. I mean… Everything was so good between us. Everything felt amazing. Even though we didn't see each other that often. And then, out of a sudden, you just decided to ignore me for days. Who does that?" She knew she was ranting, but she wanted to take it out of her chest. And honestly, she needed more than what Arizona was offering. She wasn't settling for mediocre explanations. As much as her heart was conflicted between running away and skydiving head first inside Arizona's world.

"I'm sorry." It wasn't enough for Callie. I'm sorry was not enough. I'm sorry in this situation didn't mean anything.

"What did you come here for today?" She had told Arizona to look for her when she was ready for something more. This conversation didn't seem to be going in that direction. She didn't have the right to ask anything from Arizona. She was her own person. She could make her own decisions. She had her own feelings. And no one had control over those. Not even Arizona.

"I came to apologize."

"Okay. Well, you apologized. And I forgive you." She looked at the rich blue eyes. They were shinning, starting to collect some tears. She wasn't going to stay here to see it. It was the second time they were in this position. Arizona was once more speechless. And Callie was frustrated. The feeling of final resolution settled inside her. Her hopes of a future with the woman in front of her quickly vanishing. "I have some post ops to do. I should go back to work. Take care, Arizona." She nodded at the blonde and smiled at her one last time.

Callie's tired feet came to life again as she stood from the chair and turned to leave the cafeteria. She didn't know what to think. Mostly she was just exhausted. Now physically and mentally. That was a good thing. It meant that maybe, just maybe, she would be able to sleep when she got home. And sleep would be much appreciated. She needed the blank space sleep always brought to her thoughts.

Before she could disapear behind the cafeteria door's she heard loud words she just a few miliseconds ago never thought she would ever hear. It sounded desperate but timid at the same time. Either way, it was enough to make her freeze on the spot. A shiver runned over her spine and she heard it again. Lower this time, but still loud enough to make her insides twist. "I love you". She would name the feeling cursing through her right now. But she couldn't. She turned around. At this point, everyone in the cafeteria was looking at her and at the owner of the declaration of love. Arizona was standing now, in front of the table they were sat at a minute ago. Once more the pink mouth opened to repeat "I love you." A nervous smile followed right behind. Callie didn't think that in a million lives she could ever turn her back to that.

 _"[…]So come let me love you_  
 _Come let me love you_  
 _And then colour me in"_

 _(Colour me in – Damien Rice)_

* * *

 **AN:** Hi, guys. I'm sorry for the long wait. You see, my computer was not working, I borrowed my auntie's so I could deliver a little present for you guys before the year ended. So, here is another chapter. I hope you like it. And I also hope everyone has an amazing new year's eve and that 2019 brings health and happiness to all of you. All mistakes are mine.


	16. Chapter 16: Almost heaven

**Chapter 16: Almost heaven**

 _"I wonder how Agab can feel this much_

 _How Agab can feel [...] something this big..."_

"Why did you do that?" Callie asked frustrated as soon as she closed the door on the first on call room she found her way after dragging Arizona by the hand through the halls. This could only be a joke. And if she was being honest, she didn't believe it one bit. Arizona Robbins just screamed she loved her in front of everyone in the cafeteria. It would have felt much better if she had showed it along the months they were together rather than screamed it in front of unknown people, in her work place. This... had to be a big joke.

"Because I love you." The blonde's voice was firm and sure. Unfortunately, it didn't serve to calm Callie's angst.

She wanted to be happy about this. Truthfully! The things that had happened the last few weeks didn't allow her, though. It wasn't fair of Arizona to ignore her for three weeks and show up declaring love. Love was a very strong word. Arizona didn't say she was in love with her. She said she loved her. To many it could mean the same thing, but to Callie, to love someone was beyond any kind of passion filled feeling. When she declared to Arizona weeks ago that she was in love with her, she did it because it was true, of course. But she chose to say she was in love because she thought she was not prepared to declare actual love to someone. Much less someone who was clearly struggling with their feelings for her. At that time she was not prepared to say she loved Arizona. And Arizona was not ready to listen. A part of Callie doubted Arizona being ready to declare what she just half screamed in the cafeteria. Right now, she didn't quite believe her.

"Stop saying that." She declared angrily.

"Callie… Callie. Stop. Look at me. I love you." Arizona had held both her wrist firmly and looked directly at her eyes. Piercing blue penetrating her.

"And what do you expect me to do with that information?" She was still not convinced. Callie freed her hands from the blonde's grip. She watched Arizona sigh heavily, probably in realization that it wouldn't be that easy.

"I was supposed to ask you to be my girlfriend. After Tim's party. I was always supposed to invite you to come with me. And after the party I was going to bring you to my house and I say that I was in love with you. I had this entire beautiful plan in my head. I just… panicked after that. When I got home that first day and saw your text messages and the missed phone call I suddenly started doubting myself." The last sentence was said with such frustration. Arizona brought her hands to her hair and averted her eyes from the sight of Callie. She walked in the opposite direction and sat in the bottom bunk bed.

"Are you doubting yourself now? Because if you are, Arizona… Really, you should just let me be. I can't throw myself at you like people throw themselves from airplanes because I have no parachute in this situation."

"You won't need one." She readily said, looking straight at Callie's eyes again. It was strange to have Arizona acting like this about them. The entirety of their time together she was always very insecure about how she felt and about what she wanted. This was atypical and Callie was afraid it wouldn't last.

"Arizona…" Callie started, her tone calmer now.

"I promise, Callie."

"Don't do that." She pleaded. Walking closer, she sat on the bed next to Arizona and looked at her for a moment. "You can't promise things like that, Arizona. It's not how it works."

"Look at me, Callie." Arizona asked, even though Callie was already looking at her. It was a plead for her to believe in whatever she was going to say next. "I promise you. I want you to believe in me. I didn't love you starting from today. It's been months since we got to know each other, Callie. Since we met that day in the park, I've been thinking of you in a completely different way. Tim got home from deployment that day. And we had a talk about this mysterious woman he could clearly see I was falling for, without really knowing. It was strange and overwhelming. I've been trying to ignore it for a very long time."

It was good to hear all of that. It made her heart flutter and made her stomach hurt with anxiety. But things didn't happen like that. A person couldn't simply say they loved you and you would jump in their arms as if there was no tomorrow. She needed to understand where this was coming from. Arizona needed to finally say things. What she was really feeling now. What she had been feeling all this time. She was trying now. But Callie needed more. "What has changed from last week to today?"

Warm hands searched for hers, Arizona's thumb caressing her skin. "I really wish my words were enough for you to believe me. But I know they are not. And I know that my actions confused you all this time. But as much as I seemed insecure, because I was, and I might still be, it was never about you. I was always sure about you. You deserve everything I can give you or more. Actually, more. You deserve more. I was insecure about myself. Because I was not sure about what I would become after you. I'm not used to feeling like this, Callie." A chuckle escaped her lips as she paused and looked at their hands. "I've been with women. I've been in love. But I never had someone consume my every thought like this. I'm used to being in relationships. I'm just not used to caring this much. My actions were the opposite of what one would expect. And mostly, not what you expected. And I'm very sorry about that. But yesterday, after talking to Teddy, who is going through a hard time regarding love, I got thinking that I was wasting time. Wasting time with you. In my mind, I would always have a little more time to consider us and to sort my feelings out. My insecurities, the ones from yesterday and from weeks ago, are still there. I just decided not to let them keep me away from you anymore. Because it was hurting me. And I know it was hurting you. So, I came here today, without really knowing what I would say. I just really needed to at least apologize. But I ended up saying what only last night I could assume to myself. And that is the fact that I feel like this I feel for you can only be called love. And I would really like an opportunity to deal with my insecurities _while_ loving you, if you give me the chance."

There were no words in Callie's mind to respond to all of that. She felt in the way Arizona's hands had become sweaty that she was nervous and that what she had just done was something very big for the blonde. Probably something she had never really done before with any lover she had. It was scary, she could relate. But there she was, trying to do what she just said she wanted an opportunity to. Trying to deal with her insecurities while loving Callie. The brunette wanted all of the freaking insecurities gone. She wanted a light, deep, fun, calm but fierce love. She didn't want doubts and fear.

Not giving Arizona the "chance" she wanted was not an option, though. Callie's chest constricted at the thought of her. She was invaded by a wave of joy every time the blonde smiled at her and by a wave of lust every time she kissed her. Not giving herself the chance to live that was also not an option. She would live forever wondering what could have happened.

"Do you really mean all of this, Arizona?" She asked as if she needed to hear it one more time to make it real.

"I love you." She simply said. My God, Callie still couldn't believe it. She smiled Arizona's way and, using their attached hands, pulled her in for a hug. This here was good. Even with their legs preventing them to get closer, the thin uncomfortable mattress under their buts and the hospital smells. It was good in a very special way, because she didn't feel pressured to say she loved her back and she didn't feel suffocated by the blonde's declaration. She was relieved and let herself feel happy for now. Any problems she was sure they were going to have, she could think about it and work through it later. So, she inhaled Arizona's scent deeply and kissed the skin on the fair neck where her face had come to rest.

"What time does your shift end?" Arizona asked close to her ear while they were still hugging.

Callie reluctantly pulled back to look at her. "I was supposed to go home yesterday night. Cristina asked me to cover the pit for her. Then, I was supposed to leave early morning, but I had the emergency surgery and got caught up. I've been here for 30 hours now."

"Can I accompany you home?"

"I can't go right now. Those post ops are true." She chuckled, to what Arizona followed.

"I'll wait for you."

"You've been here all morning, Arizona."

"I've been here _working_ all morning while waiting. And I'll continue working, if no one has stolen my laptop from the cafeteria's table." She chuckled again, making Callie smile. "I'll wait for you. Okay?"

"Okay. I won't be that long. An hour max." Callie sighed and stood up from the bed, followed by Arizona, who held her by the wrist. The blonde looked at her timidly and pulled her in by the hand she was holding.

Her face came closer to Callie's and she looked her right in the eyes. "Can I?" She asked, her other hand coming to Callie's neck. Her intention was made very clear now. She waited patiently for a response. As Callie nodded, Arizona closed the distance and sealed their lips in a lingering peck, sighing heavy at the contact. It had been so long! Three weeks were too long to be without those lips.

Callie brought her own hands to both sides of Arizona's face and opened her mouth in a not so subtle invite. The need for the blonde, cumulated through the weeks seemed to boil up. Her skin was hot and her tongue eager as it finally met with Arizona's. And by that one kiss, she knew she was doing she right thing.

Arizona was the one who broke the contact, a few seconds later, giving her one more peck before pulling back.

"Alright. Go. I'll… I'll be waiting."

Callie sure needed to hurry.

* * *

They got to Callie's apartment around 1pm. Arizona looked around in recognition of what had been the place which held many of their encounters. It dawned on her that Callie had never been at her house. Not for any particular reason. They just were always closer to Callie's whenever they decided to just head home and enjoy their time alone.

In the last months they were dating, it wasn't always that they could freely show displays of affection. Arizona was not a celebrity, but she was still a well-known person around LA. After the whole semi nudes fiasco at the beginning of the year, the blonde had become extra cautious. Because of that, kisses and snuggles and make out sessions always happened inside these walls.

Arizona watched timidly as Callie entered the apartment and dropped her bag and keys on a side table close to the door, walking straight to the kitchen to get herself some water. It was different, entering the place now. It was like declaring her feelings gave her a new perspective on everything. Like when you come out of the closet. You feel like the weight of the world has dropped from your shoulders. It is like your entire life has a new meaning. All of your other problems seem very small and easy to solve. It is freeing and liberating to finally feel what you feel and act towards it without berating yourself or feeling guilty.

Callie offered her some water, to what Arizona said no. The brunette came closer to her and put her glass on the kitchen counter, bringing both of her hands to hold her by the hips and their bodies together. Arizona's arms immediately came to circle around the caramel neck.

"Why don't you go take a shower and I'll find something for us to eat?" She suggested. She knew Callie had to be exhausted. A 30 hours shift, an emergency surgery and the whole animosity of Arizona showing up on her work place were showing on her very tired, but beautiful, face.

"Yeah. I probably stink." The latina wrinkled her nose and loosened her grip on the blonde.

Arizona tightened her hold in response, bringing her face to Callie's neck and nuzzling her skin. "You smell like hospital. And I have to say, I never thought I would like that smell. But you make it hot."

"You're biased." She heard Callie say after snorting.

"Probably. But I like it." The blonde pulled back and smiled. "Go. I'll see what I can do." She reluctantly let go of the warm body and watched Callie walk away after depositing a kiss to her cheek.

When Callie came back, half an hour later, Arizona was on her laptop, which rested over the coffee table, sitting on the living room floor. "Hey." Her rich voice sounded as she appeared from her bedroom door. She was wearing grey sweatpants and a light purple t-shirt, her hardened nipples poking slightly through the material. Arizona had to bite her lips not to voice her appreciation.

"Hi. Well, I asked for delivery if that is okay with you. From Vineards, since you liked it so much that time you went to have lunch with me at VOX. It should be here any minute."

Arizona watched Callie walk closer and sit by her side on the floor. "Thank you. My stomach will be very happy with that." Her brown eyes were tired and her movements slow. Not able to resist, Arizona brought her face near Callie's and deposited a kiss on her cheek. Her hair smelled fruity, like peach and mango.

"Mmm, you smell good." The blonde gave her a peck on the lips and quickly turned her attention back to her computer, saving the file she was working on so she could focus on the woman beside her.

"You can keep working until the food is here, if you want. I don't mind." The latina's voice sounded close to her.

"No. It's okay. I've done the most important parts." Closing her notebook, she pushed the object further on the coffee table and looked back at Callie, noticing how her eyes were small from sleep. She could relate to that in many occasions. Maybe not in the same intensity as Callie, but there were a few sleepless nights in Arizona's life for sure. "You look very tired."

"It was a very crazy shift. When I'm at it I don't even notice how exhausted I am. Until I take a nice, hot shower." The blonde found it endearing. She had seen Callie tired before. Sometimes even tired and with a red face after crying because of one of her cases. It seemed different now, though. One more thing declaring her love had changed. The way she felt like she now didn't need to hold anything in. Not her words, not her feelings and not the way she craved to act towards the brunette.

"C'mere." Arizona raised her arm next to Callie in invitation, feeling the dark haired head rest on her shoulder without hesitation. Small fingers immediately came to caress the still slightly humid tresses. "You can sleep after we eat. The food shouldn't take long to get here."

"Oh, I plan to. I have to be back early tomorrow morning." Callie lamented. As if on cue. The apartment doorbell sounded.

"Do you want me to get it?" Arizona had planned on something for when the food arrived. Seeing Callie so tired made her question it for a second.

"No. It's okay." The brunette sighed and stood up lamenting the loss of contact and walking to the door.

"Hi. Arizona Robbins' girlfriend?" The guy asked, takeout package in hand. Callie stood in front of him without knowing what to say.

"That'd be you." Arizona said from the other side of the room. It was not the most romantic story to tell any person who would come to ask how they met and became girlfriends. But she didn't want to wait. They had waited for too long.

"Arizona…" The latina started, looking back from the man to the blonde.

"Here is your food. Have a good day." The young guy shoved the containers on her chest and went away without waiting on a tip. Either he was very uncomfortable with the situation or in a complete hurry. She didn't know.

"Arizona…" Callie repeated, but was unable to form any more words.

"Will you be my girlfriend?" It was sudden and totally out of the blue for Callie. It was fast. A few hours ago, Callie had no expectation of Arizona coming back to her life at all. And now here the blonde was, asking her to be her girlfriend. But that was what she wanted in the first place wasn't it? The brunette was very clear that day at Tim's party. Arizona should come to her when she was ready to be in a relationship. All Arizona knew was that she was ready to try. For the sake of being honest with her own feelings, she was going to try. "I want to make this the right way this time. I want you to be my girlfriend. I'm done trying to resist what I feel for you, Callie." Arizona was now almost on her knees, the weight of her body resting partially on the couch.

Callie came closer apprehensively. She put the containers on the coffee table and sat beside the blonde again. The silence was starting to make Arizona nervous. Maybe it was indeed too soon for the brunette. Even if she was the one who wanted to make this a real relationship for so long.

"Are you sure about this?" The woman expression was serious. Maybe asking Callie to be her girlfriend through a delivery guy was the worst idea someone had ever had in history. She felt kinda stupid. Callie deserved more.

"I'm sure, Callie." The blonde brought her left hand to caress the caramel cheek. "And I'm sorry that I asked you to be my girlfriend like that. It was a lame idea."

Callie chuckled and brought her own hand over the ivory one resting on her face. "For someone like you, who invited me for coffee with a card and flowers in a box, to be your date on your brother's wedding with a dress and high heels..." Callie couldn't contain her laugh when she saw Arizona pout. "It doesn't mean I like it any less. It just proved a point to me."

"What point?"

"That I'm totally screwed." She declared, bringing the small hand to her lips and depositing a kiss to her palm. Their hands came to rest on Callie's lap.

"What?"

"I'm totally screwed if someone asks me to be their girlfriend like that and I am still totally going to say yes."

Arizona laughed. "I'm sorry. I've never asked anyone to be my girlfriend before." It was true. In all of her previous relationships, all she had to do was to say yes. It was a valid reason, though. Callie had experienced Arizona's efforts and charm before and she was freaking good at it. She just… She didn't want to waste any more time. "I'm still waiting for you to say it, though."

"Do you think I can call the guy to answer it for me? You know, to maintain the pattern." She had a mischievous grin in her face. Arizona's mouth dropped in horror.

"You are terrible!" She swatted Callie lightly on the arm.

"Ouch!" The latina chuckled. "I don't think he would come back, though. He didn't even wait for us to pay or for the tip."

"That's because I've paid it already with my credit card when I called. And he gets lots of tips when he comes to deliver it at VOX."

"You scared the guy."

" _You_ scared him. He knows me for years. You were the one acting weird."

"I'm not to blame if you caught me completely by surprise."

The blonde smiled and reached for the containers on table, handing it to Callie and waiting anxiously. Tanned hands opened the paper bags and reached inside. A small white simple envelope was grabbed and pulled out by the woman. She looked Arizona's way, watching as the blondes dimples made their appearance. Inside the envelope, a small printed card read "I can't wait to share these meals with you for all the time our future lets us. Will you be my girlfriend?"

"How did you do this?" Callie asked, her fingers caressing the abstract image and the letters on the paper. "It is your hand writing."

"I called them and made our order and said I would e-mail them something to print and put in an envelope inside the paper bag. I made a quick work on my laptop. I wrote on a piece of paper and scanned it with my phone, sent it to the laptop and put some images around on Photoshop. Then I just e-mailed it to them."

"Are you serious? All of that while I was in the shower?" Arizona nodded. "Suddenly this idea doesn't seem lame at all." The brunette laughed as she looked at the paper. "Do you have the original? The one you wrote with your handwriting?" Arizona reached inside the pocket of her laptop cover and pulled the small piece of paper, handing it to Callie.

The blonde tried not to freak out as Callie still hadn't really answered her question. "So…"

"I'll be very happy to share these meals with you for as long as our future let us, Arizona. Of course, I'll be your girlfriend."

Arizona Robbins had a girlfriend. After almost three years without being in a relationship. And for the first time, she was genuinely happy about it. Ecstatic. Completely terrified, but overwhelmingly happy. Suddenly, it seemed too long since she had last kissed Callie's lips. Without notice, she brought her hands to either side of her face sealed their lips together in a searing kiss, reveling in the fact that now she could do that anytime she wanted. Because Callie was her girlfriend.

* * *

"Hey, you didn't come the whole morning. It is almost 3 pm." Barbara said from her desk, getting up when she saw Arizona getting closer. She had texted her assistant early morning saying she would be about one or two hours late. She hadn't planned on taking so long to get to work. She never thought she would end up spending her whole morning at the hospital and then the beginning of the afternoon at Callie's. She didn't regret it one bit, though.

"I know. I'm sorry. I'm here now. Any emergencies around here?"

"Not really. Only some papers from the breast cancer campaign that you have to sign. They have to be delivered until 5pm. You should take care of that now. Otherwise the delivery of all the material will be late, with you going to New York tomorrow."

"Yes. I'll do that now. Where are the papers?"

"On your office desk."

"Come with me and I'll sign them and you can send it to deliver right away." They walked inside Arizona's office and the blonde went right to her desk, taking the papers from inside the envelope and signing them in all the needed pages. "Here. Do you have everything ready for tomorrow?"

They were going to New York in the middle of the night. She would have very little time to sleep until she had do get ready and go to the airport. And as much as she was excited about it, she was now also sad about leaving Callie less than a day before 'getting her back'.

"Almost. I only have to talk with them to say at what time we will arrive so they can pick us up from the airport and right to their building. We can check in into the hotel later, I already arranged that."

"Okay. I talked to Oliver, he will pick you up at 3am and then pick me up so we can be at the airport around 4am. It's not ideal, I know. But I'm sure you will be happy with the hotel we have booked and you will have time to rest there, I promise." Oliver was the one responsible for part of the delivery service at VOX and the one she often requested as her personal driver when she needed one. She liked driving her own car and coming and going as she pleased without having anyone to do it for her. Driving was something she took great pleasure in doing. But sometimes it was convenient to have someone to drive you. Like when you have to go to the airport and don't want to leave your car at its parking lot.

"No problem, Arizona. It's my job. I'm happy to go to New York. I only went there once and I was still a kid. It will be nice to visit again." The assistant smiled her way. It was nice having Barbara with her. In the last months since the leaked pictures fiasco, she had come to enjoy the other woman's company and professionalism. It was nice to see her developing her potential. If she kept doing this good of a work, maybe there would be a good raise in her salary in the near future.

"Okay. Good. I'll finish what I have to do around here. I don't want to receive any calls for the next 3 hours unless it is my family or anything truly important." Or Callie! She smiled at herself at the thought. But Callie wouldn't call her work place. She would call directly on her personal phone.

"Absolutely." The other woman said and walked away with the signed papers in hand.

Sitting on the chair in front of her desk, Arizona sighed heavily and rested her head on the backrest, closing her eyes. Today had been so abnormal. Her whole life was looking completely different now. How could that be possible? A person wakes up some random day, makes a decision about something important, acts on it and suddenly everything was different, not for actually being different, but for being felt differently. It had never been like this. The only other woman she actually was in love with before had a similar effect on her life, but not quite like this.

This is what she was afraid of. All of the changes she knew getting in a relationship with Callie would bring. Changes on her routine, changes on her way of feeling and thinking and acting. And the worst of all, the changes and the heartbreak if it ever came to an end if they didn't work out. Not only she didn't have time for heartbreak, but being honest with herself, while she was at it, she was terrified of getting her heart broken. Because she had never ever been this in love with someone. She had never loved someone. Not like this. And it was ridiculous to see how all of the things people said about loving someone made sense. All of that crap about knowing when the person was the right one. She laughed at herself and her teenage lovesick brain and groaned. Fuck it, she thought. Callie was worth it.

Sighing again, she opened her eyes and reached for the phone inside her purse.

 ** _"_** ** _I asked her to me my girlfriend."_** She texted her best friend. The one who had kicked her ass last night about how stupid she was being. Not that anyone had never said it before. Last night it just hit her in a different way.

 ** _"_** ** _You did?"_** Came the response just a few seconds later. When they decided that the surgeon was going to travel with her, she said that she would speak with the chief today and see how soon she could go. As she was already off this weekend and only had four surgeries scheduled for the next week, the blonde was granted the right to use five of her off days.

 ** _"_** ** _She is my girl now. I can't believe it, Teddy."_**

 ** _"_** ** _There was no doubt that she would accept, Arizona. Don't screw this up, alright? Try and be happy. You both deserve it. And congrats."_**

 ** _"_** ** _Thanks, Teddy. You ready to go to New York?"_** The blonde was happy to have this time with Teddy. She couldn't remember the last time they had done something like this. Of course, Arizona was going to work, but she had all the nights free and Sunday all day.

 ** _"_** ** _I am. I need it. I can't wait. Does Callie know that you are traveling tomorrow? A day after you guys became girlfriends?"_**

 ** _"_** ** _We didn't have time to talk properly yet. I'm going to have dinner with her tonight. We will talk and I'll tell her."_** Arizona had thought about telling Callie about it when they had lunch just a bit ago, but the brunette was so tired and sleepy that she thought it would be better to talk about it another time. When she decided it was time to come to work and let the brunette sleep, after Callie's protests, they agreed that the blonde would come back later for dinner. That would be the perfect moment to tell her.

 ** _"_** ** _Alright. See you at the airport. We can talk more then. I have to go. Someone is paging me in the ER. God help it isn't surgical because I still have to pack tonight."_**

 ** _"_** ** _Go be awesome. See you at the airport. Text me when you arrive there."_**

Reading the conversation she had just had with Teddy on her phone, Arizona realized there was one more person who deserved to know about this. ** _"I think you will be happy to know that I asked Callie to be my girlfriend and she said yes. Just don't go telling everyone yet, okay? It just happened a few hours ago."_** After her brother's birthday party, it had taken her a few days to come to him and apologize. He was hurt by the fact that she had considered not going to his party and it hurt herself to know her brother was mad at her. Tim was the most important person in her life. He was her constant, her safe place. She knew there was absolutely nothing, nothing he wouldn't try and help her with. She had hugged him and asked for forgiveness. There was no pride where Timothy Robbins was involved. He had hugged her back and kissed her temple, saying it was not okay to close herself up like that. And all the things she knew already, but needed to hear. He never said anything about Callie that day, though. She was thankful for that. They never touched Callie's name since then. So she was sure he would be shocked by the sudden text.

 ** _"_** ** _YOU FUCKING WHAT? ARE YOU SERIOUS?"_** She laughed at her phone a few minutes later when he answered. Bingo! It started ringing immediately after. She picked up and lamented the fact that she probably wouldn't be able to do half of the work she was planning for this afternoon.

* * *

"Blondie." Arizona was faced with Mark Sloan as Callie's apartment door opened. It wasn't the most pleasant encounter. She didn't despise the man, but she definitely had reservations about him. He was unpleasant and nosy, cocky and very inappropriate. During the last few months in which she had been dating Callie, his presence was more constant than she would like it to be. More than once Callie had taken calls from him during their dates or had he knocked on her door when they were together at the brunette's house. There was nothing really wrong about those facts. She knew they were friends, good friends. She just didn't understand why her now girlfriend was so fond of the man. For some reason, she didn't quite appreciate his presence.

"Oh, hi, Dr. Sloan. Is Callie home?" She politely asked.

"She is. Come on in." The fact that the man seemed so comfortable in her girlfriend's apartment bothered her just a little bit. He was barefoot, wearing a burgundy short sleeved shirt and light jeans. He stepped out of the entryway to let her in. As soon as she entered the living room, she saw Callie coming from the direction of what Arizona knew was her bedroom.

"Hey." Callie smiled. "I was starting to ask myself if you were still coming." Depositing a kiss into the fair cheek the latina took her hand.

"I'm sorry. I had to go home before coming here."

"It's alright. Mark was making me company."

"I would never say no to good food." The man broke their interaction, smiling smugly while still standing close to the door.

"You're staying to have dinner with us?" Arizona asked, trying not to sound disappointed.

"No. He isn't." Callie was quick to answer. "He already ate. The food was ready half an hour ago. He was just making me company while you arrived."

"Oh. Okay."

"Well, I think that's my cue. Bye, blondie. Bye, Callie. Thanks for the food. Don't do anything I wouldn't." He smirked, walking past the door without putting any shoes. It just reminded Arizona of one more thing, the man lived just across the hall.

"That would be almost nothing, Mark."

"Exactly!" He shouted closing the door, to what Callie chuckled.

"I'm sorry about him."

"It's okay." Arizona brushed it off. She didn't want Mark present in their time together more than necessary. She just wanted to enjoy a few hours with the brunette, without any worries, about anything. The blonde brought her right hand, the one free from Callie's hold, to the tanned neck and pulled the other woman for a brief kiss. It didn't seem to be enough, though. As soon as Callie's lips parted slightly, the need for a more intimate kiss grew inside Arizona, to which she responded darting her tongue inside her girlfriend's mouth. Callie sucked on the smooth muscle and moaned at the taste, their saliva mixing together.

"Uh, this day keeps getting better." Callie declared, breathing heavily as they pulled back a few seconds later. Arizona smiled at her, pecking her lips briefly.

"I brought some wine, but forgot it in my car. I can go get it, if you think it would go well with the food you made? It is white." The women were very close still, not wanting to let go after the kiss ended. Arizona was holding Callie's arms while tanned hands gripped her sides.

"It's shrimps with some butter sauce and broccoli rice. Nothing too fancy. White wine would be perfect, but... I don't think it would be nice to drink if you are driving home later."

"Yeah. I can call a cab." The blonde suggested.

"No. It is okay. We can save that wine to another opportunity."

"You look very pretty." It was clear that the brunette had put a little more effort tonight. She was wearing black tight jeans and a white t-shirt with some black drawings and a belt. Her hair was dried and flowing around her shoulders in its natural waves. Light make up covered her beautiful face. In her hurry to get here, because she was already running late, Arizona had only put some caramel trousers and white blouse, not bothering to blow dry her hair or put any make up on.

"Thank you. And you..." The latina stopped to give Arizona a quick peck. "... always look pretty." She smiled sweetly.

"Is this a date?"

"Why do you ask?"

"Well, you put make up on. And I can see from here that the dinner table looks extra special, with candles and all."

"Would you like this to be a date?"

"I surelly would." She wasn't expecting it, but it was welcome, anyways. It warmed her heart that Callie had made this for her, even after everything she had done the last few weeks. It proved that her girlfriend had a good heart, that she was able to forgive, that she was thoughtful and considerate.

"Then it is a date." The brunette's hands caressed Arizona's side over the shirt. It was a shame her blouse was tucked in her trousers.

"I want to apologize for what I did to you, Callie. I can't promise you that I won't be scared sometimes. And I may try to push you away, but I promise that I will try my best to be what you need."

"You've already apologized, Arizona. Let's just forget about it and move on. Okay? Let's just agree that it won't happen again."

"I'm taking this seriously, Callie. I want us to work. I never wanted so much for a relationship to work like I want this one to." To be honest, Arizona had never put too much effort in any of her relationships. She was always attentive, of course. But she never felt like she needed or wanted to surprise the woman she had been with small trips to see stars. Only Callie had ever aroused that need inside her. As if you like someone so much you want to make them smile every opportunity you get.

"Me neither." Callie declared, their eyes locked for a few seconds, before the brunette smiled and pecked her lips once more. "We should eat. The food is going to get too cold."

Half an hour later, after their dinner had been eaten over light conversation about Callie's job at the hospital, it came back to Arizona's mind the fact that she was going to be traveling in just a few hours, to spend a whole week away. She had to talk to Callie about it. She knew there wouldn't be a problem. Callie wouldn't react to this in a bad way. But still, it made her a little anxious to share the news with the brunette. It wasn't an ideal situation for they very very recent relationship. But life and work weren't always fair.

"I have something to tell you." They were sitting on the sofa, now. Callie had made them some tea to have after dinner. It was autumn in Los Angeles, not exactly cold, but the temperature had definitely dropped a few degrees.

"Oh-kay."

"It's nothing bad. I mean… It is a little inconvenient right about now. But it isn't anything bad." Arizona took Callie's hand and started caressing the caramel skin with her thumbs.

"Alright." Callie sounded a bit unsure. Arizona didn't blame her, after everything that happened in the last weeks.

"I have to travel for work." She looked for any sign of annoyance, disapproval or disappointment in the brown eyes and didn't find any.

"That's it?" Doubt was replaced by confusion.

"Tomorrow." The blonde saw realization hit Callie. It took her a couple of seconds to absorb the news, but she recovered fast and answered without hesitation.

"Oh, okay. Where are you going?"

"New York. I'll be there until next saturday, probably. Initially I would be coming home this sunday morning, but if I get the deal, I'll have to spend the following week working on some filming with the commercial producers. Plus, I invited Teddy to go with me. She has been dealing with some stuff."

"I know. I live with Cristina, remember? I talked to Teddy about it yesterday for a bit. I think it will be good for her to have a little fun and distract herself from everything. I don't know… Maybe take her to a club Saturday night. She may find someone there to, you know… Take her mind out of the someone she has to get over." It was so like Callie to focus on the fact that Teddy needed some company and help dealing with her situation instead of the fact that Arizona was going to be away for a week. A week was not much. The problem was not the duration, but the timing of this trip.

"I'm sorry I have to travel so soon after we are officially together." Arizona looked for Callie's eyes and scooted closer to her on the sofa. "I had this trip planned for weeks. It is important."

"It's totally fine." The brunette eased her worries, while tucking a strand of blonde hair behind Arizona's ear. "I'm not gonna lie, I was really looking forward to have a few moments with you this weekend, if you had time. But I understand. What time is your flight tomorrow?"

"5 am! I have to be at the airport around 4am. That's why I went home before coming here. Besides the fact that I had to have a shower, I had to pack a small suitcase to take with me."

"Does that mean you have to go home in a bit?" The effort Callie put into not pouting didn't have any effect. Her bottom lip was definitely prominent, which made Arizona chuckle.

"It would be best. It's already past 9pm. I have to be ready to leave by 3:20am, which means I have to wake up before 3 o'clock."

"That is like being called into the hospital for an emergency in the middle of the night." A cute nose scrunched up in displeasure. The woman sure was the victim of 'such absurd' many times. Being a resident, and a freaking awesome resident at that, Callie was sure to be pulled out of her sleep many nights.

"Yes. Just a lot better because I can sleep during the _long_ flight there. I'll get there well rested, hopefully. With the help of a few pills."

"You take pills to fly?" Surprise took over her face.

"Sometimes. Mostly if the flight is too long. I like flying, but I get anxious at the same time." Arizona explained. She was not an addicted to sleeping pills. Nowadays she barely flied anywhere anymore. It was not often that she had a long flight. Maybe once or twice a year to visit her parents during Christmas and one of their birthdays.

"Why don't you sleep here?"

"What?" The blonde was taken completely by surprise. The conversation went from a topic to another totally different.

"We can wake up at whatever time you want and go to your house pick up your stuff and I can drop you off at the airport in time." The offer was definitely very tempting, but so inconvenient for Callie in many ways. Arizona couldn't agree to that.

"No. You won't be dropping me off. You have work tomorrow, Callie. I won't let you wake up at 3 am just to bring me to the airport and lose important hours of sleep. You need to take care of yourself." She reasoned.

"I wouldn't mind."

"I would."

"Is it a no to sleeping over, then?" Arizona didn't know what to say. The idea of sleeping with Callie felt terrifying and amazing at the same time. It had been years since she last shared a bed with a woman for the night. She started to get anxious. Her natural instinct to run boiling up from under its hidden place.

"Uh…"

"It's only sleep Arizona. You can sleep in my bedroom and I will sleep on Cristina's bed if you'd prefer. She is at Meredith's house." She looked at Callie's eyes. They were so genuine and calm. This woman in front of Arizona was beautiful and captivating.

The blonde leaned closer and touched plump lips with hers. A shiver ran on her spine at the chaste contact. It had to mean something to get such reaction from just a simple kiss. Callie brought her hands to either side of her girlfriend's face and held her in place. Arizona's mouth opened just a bit and Callie took the opportunity to suck on her bottom lip. She released a groan and deposited a peck on Callie's lips to end their kiss.

"I won't take you off your bed so I can sleep there. I'm 31, you're 29. I'm sure we are mature enough to share a bed." Their breaths were mixing together as the proximity between them was very small.

"Yeah?" The woman's smile was so big that Arizona had to smile too.

"Yes."

"Good." Callie smiled and brought her face to rest on the fair neck, nuzzling the skin she found there. "I have a baggy shirt that I'm sure will be comfortable enough for you to sleep in. And a brand new tooth brush in my bathroom cabinet." Lips close to Arizona's ear, the melodic voice sounded very arousing. "And a very very comfy bed. And hot water if you want to shower before leaving." An open mouthed kiss was deposited on the blonde's pulse point, making Arizona quiver. "And you can even get a good bye kiss." Callie pulled back and looked at her, her eyes shining with contentment.

"Well, it seems like I made the right decision, huh?" The blonde kissed the tip of her girlfriend's nose and brought her arms around Callie's neck.

"I would say so." The latina smiled before kissing the blonde on the lips again.

 _"How it multiplies in my veins_

 _And in my blood and home_

 _It triggers itself in my thought."_

 _(Beautiful Hell - Adna)_

* * *

 **AN:** Finally an update! In compensation, I think this is the biggest chapter I've posted until now. I really hope you like it. Ang guys, guess what? I'm working now, in my nursing field, which is amazing. However, I'll soon have to leave my job because I've also started a master's program and unfortunately the hospital can't provide all my shifts to be at night so I can attend the master's classes during the day. *cries* Anyways... All mistakes are mine. Let me know what you think?


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